You Think I'm Pretty?
by scarlett.speaks
Summary: She's new in town and the attraction is instant. What to do when what you want isn't anything like what you've known?
1. Chapter 1

Hauling boxes was definitely going to be her workout for the week. Adina stared up at the one she'd saved for last. It was oddly shaped, and at the time she'd thought it perfect for her resource books, but now that she had to pull it from the top of the SUV, she was rethinking her position. She balanced one tiptoe on the curb and her other foot on the wheel of the Jeep and wriggled the edge of the box on the luggage rack so it was closer to the edge.

She maneuvered it a little bit at a time so that slowly one edge of the box worked its way toward her. The house was a cute little bungalow and she was glad for the opportunity to get away from the distractions of the City so she could finish her book. Her friend had tossed her the keys, _go stay as long as you want, make yourself at home—oh hey there's a casino in town now!_ She didn't plan to gamble, but she was grateful the town wasn't as remote as she'd originally thought. The bungalow was on a quiet street but a few miles over was an honest-to-god Wal-Mart, so that meant it wasn't completely the sticks, right?

The edge of the box teetered over the side of the luggage rack at the same time a cramp pierced the arch of her foot on the curb. She let her attention waver from the box for a split second and she felt it shift under her fingers again. The thing was going to fall on her face, "Crap," she muttered, trying to get her weight under it to catch it, but her foot throbbed again, "oh…bad idea, bad idea, bad idea," the box shifted again and she knew it was going to slide right at her face, but she couldn't get out from under it fast enough, "—shit!"

"I got it!" Hands appeared from behind her, strong arms reaching around her to grab the edge of the box and keep it from her face. The person they were attached to moved so she could get out of the way and she limped from under him. He made a sound of exertion and hefted the thing down from the SUV.

"Thank you so much," Adina's attention was still on her foot, she was flexing it against the curb, but she turned to thank the person, "You saved me."

He grinned and she was struck by a pair of piercing brown eyes and a smile that was just this side of sinful. "You should be more careful."

"Would you believe that's not the first time I've heard that?" She laughed, "I'll take that from you, if you want." She made a move to take the box from him and he hefted it again.

"It's pretty awkward, you sure?" She took a split second to appreciate the way the muscles in his forearms moved.

"Yeah, I don't think it's that heavy, just awkward, right?"

"Did you get this up there yourself?" His tone was incredulous but he held it out to her and she wrapped her fingers around the box edge. She shook her head as he slowly let go and she stumbled under the weight. He lurched to take the box back from her.

"Okay it was _not_ that heavy when I left Louisiana, I swear." Although in retrospect maybe that's why her neighbor had given her such a hard time when he was helping her tie her luggage to the luggage rack. The man smirked, but he didn't say anything. Adina sighed, "Would you mind terribly bringing it inside for me? I really appreciate this."

He jerked his head at the sidewalk, "Lead on."

Adina took a step toward the path and looked over her shoulder, "I'm Adina, by the way." She opened the garden gate and stepped out of the way as the man edged his way through.

He made a sound that could have been a grunt as they walked up the two steps to the porch. Adina opened the storm door for him and stood to the side so he could get by.

"You can just put that anywhere," she said, stepping around a suitcase. "Can I get you some water or something?"

"Water would be nice," he said, bending over to thunk the box on top of the empty coffee table. He straightened, taking in the disarray that was her borrowed living room. "I'm Mathias."

She grinned, reaching into the cooler at her feet she pulled out one of the last bottles of water from her trip-snack hoard. It dripped on the hardwood floor but she held it out to him anyway. "Well Mathias, aren't you just my big, brawny hero."

His laugh was big and infectious. He took a long drink from the bottle but his eyes didn't leave her. Amusement danced in them. Adina resisted the urge to fidget. "So you gonna tell me what was in that box?"

"Books," She sat down on top of the suitcase, "please sit," she gestured at the sofa.

"Books, huh?" His mouth slid into that smirk again and he sat down on top of the box of books he'd just put on the coffee table. "You almost die hauling a box of books from Louisiana?"

"Well that wasn't the original plan," she laughed a little and nudged a box with her toe. "They're resource materials. I'm working on a book."

"Oh yeah?" He made a point to take in the piles of boxes and the few suitcases. "Must be some book."

"What makes you say that?" Adina shifted on the suitcase, the handle was digging uncomfortably into her butt.

He laughed, "You're just a long way from home."

"Oh, that," she shrugged, "I was having a hard time focusing in New Orleans. This place belongs to a friend, she's renting it to me for a while."

"Ah," his look told her he was fully aware she was dodging. "I should go."

"Right," she jumped up, running a hand through her hair. "Thank you again."

"Sure," he stood up as well, "I couldn't very well stand by while a pretty girl was hurt, now could I?" He was close to her, his hand on the door knob. She was leaning against the door jamb. This close she realized he wasn't much taller than she was. Not like Alpha-male, Captain America tall. He dipped his head so he was looking her more fully in the eye, a corner of his mouth pulling into another smirk. "Me being a big, brawny hero and all."

Adina grinned, "You think I'm pretty?" His head jerked, the slight mocking tilt shifted for a split second and she laughed. "Let me cook you dinner," she found she was a little nervous about asking. Not that it was anything like a date. "To thank you, I mean," she floundered, "For saving me."

"Right now?"

She flinched, "No, sorry, I didn't mean right this second I mean it's only like three o'clock." Adina said a few four letter words in her head. She didn't used to be horrible at this.

Mathias laughed, "When were you thinking?"

"Uhm, tomorrow?" she shrugged, "Wednesday, maybe?"

"Wednesday's good," he reached past her for the storm door latch. "Say...seven?"

"Seven's good," Adina swallowed, a little embarrassed to realize her throat was dry. Jesus, it was like she'd never asked someone out before _ever_.

"Great, see you then," his gaze slide over her and she realized she was blushing. "Welcome to Wyoming."

The storm door snapped shut behind him and Adina stumbled to the coffee table. She sank down to sit on the box he'd brought in for her and reached blindly for his half-finished bottle of water. Her hand trembled as she brought it to her lips. What the hell was _wrong_ with her.


	2. Chapter 2

Mathias left the Tribal Police Headquarters at six. He made a point to chat a bit with the officer on desk duty because six was early for him to leave. It wasn't particularly odd for him to have a date, he thought as he made his way to his cruiser, it was a little weird he was going on a date before nine o'clock, though.

Once he got to his vehicle he popped the trunk, reaching into a black gym bag for a shirt that wasn't his uniform. He wasn't going to hide the fact that he was a cop, but he didn't want to show up at Adina's house in uniform any more than he wanted to tell the people he worked with he was leaving early to drive off the rez to have dinner with a white chick.

A white chick who made him think of that line from Shakespeare, what was it, something about being little and fierce. _Midsummer Night's Dream_. He didn't feel like looking it up. He folded his uniform shirt carefully and slid it back into the gym bag before he pulled the flannel shirt on. He wasn't going to mess with going home to shave or anything. That was too much. He slammed the trunk and walked back around to the driver side of the cruiser.

He wouldn't have even been on that street if not for Cady Longmire. He'd gone to what was passing as her home office to tape a formal deposition and happened to see Adina unloading her Jeep. She was still working at it two hours later when he left, only it was just that one box. He still didn't know why he started off down the street to ask her if she needed help in the first place. But then he'd seen the box slide, and the look of panic on her face.

Big, brawny hero. Seriously. He didn't know what she was thinking trying to haul fifty pounds of books in the first place. _So you think I'm pretty_ , thing was, he did. The innocent delight on her face when she'd asked him was what made him say yes to dinner. He kept replaying that in his head, _so you think I'm pretty._

Yeah, she was pretty. Casino traffic gave him time to think about it. Her brown eyes and full lips. He wondered what she was going to cook, and then hoped she could actually cook. And if she couldn't, he hoped she was wise enough to own it and order a pizza. Traffic was moving slowly. He wondered if that was because it was slow, or because the sight of a police cruiser made everybody immediately slow down ten miles per hour.

Mathias reached for the radio dial.

888

Adina sprinkled a pinch of cayenne into the pot bubbling on the stove. The rice was ready, the cornbread was going to come out of the oven in a few minutes, and the beans were perfect, she decided as she tasted them one last time. He should be here soon. Her heart tripped a little at that thought and she laughed at herself. She was being silly. She'd met the man for fifteen minutes tops. There was no reason for her to be this nervous.

Geeze it was like high school.

She sighed, no, not like high school. It was just that it had been so long since she'd noticed anyone outside of her work. A few bad breakups and it was easy to just put her head down and focus on writing the perfect romantic hero. If she was feeling a little horny she went online and picked someone up. Not that she did that often. Maybe once a year. If she wanted to get off she'd use her vibrator. This wasn't about that.

This was about that split second look on his face when she'd challenged him, _so you think I'm pretty_. For a split second he'd looked genuinely cornered. Not terrified by any stretch, but caught. It intrigued her. That coupled with the fact that he was very good looking meant she was nervous. She'd forced herself to not go all out with makeup. She was wearing a broken in UNC tee shirt that she'd had since she was thirteen, it was so old and had been washed so many times that it felt practically silky against her skin. A pair of skinny jeans, and nothing on her feet. The only thing she'd done to her face was a little eyeliner and mascara. It was more than what he'd seen her in last time, but not nearly what she would have done back home if she'd asked someone out.

The doorbell rang at the same time her phone went off to let her know the cornbread was ready. Adina yelled over her shoulder to hang on a minute and tapped her phone to turn off the timer. She tossed her phone back on the counter, the corn bread could wait the ten seconds it would take her to get the door. She was proud of herself for not tripping on the hall carpet and for not stopping in front of hte mirror and checking her hair before opening the front door. She unlocked the deadbolt and pulled the door open, anticipation making her a little breathless. "Right on time!"

He was smiling, leaning nonchalantly against the door frame. "Yeah, I was a little worried about traffic."

Adina couldn't help the face she made. "There's traffic here?" She glanced past him to the street, the only other car on the block other than her Jeep was a police cruiser parked just behind it. Everybody else was safely in driveways. She cocked her head jerking her chin at the cruiser, "Are you a cop?"

"Yep," he smiled and a dimple appeared. "That a problem?"

"No," she opened the door wider, "come on in. I was just about to take bread out of the oven."

He chuckled as he crossed the threshold, "You've done a lot of work." Almost all the boxes were gone. Her suitcases were unpacked in the master bedroom closet, not that she was going to invite him to see that necessarily.

"Yeah, I can't stand boxes like that. So, traffic, seriously?" She walked back down the hall to the kitchen trusting he'd follow her.

"Yeah, it's not so bad in town anymore, but out near the Rez it's a little ridiculous this time of day because of the casino." He was taking in the house as he followed her. There was a set of frosted glass pocket doors off the living room that were closed the last time he was here. This time one of them was open and he could see it led to the bedroom. There were a lot of windows so the place took in the afternoon sun in a way that made the jewel toned walls practically shimmer. The place suited her. "It smells amazing, by the way."

"Thanks, I made red beans and rice, I usually make a big batch of the stuff once a week back home. I hope you like spicy."

"Spicy's good," he sat down at one of the stools under the counter.

"Would you like something to drink? I have cider, beer, iced tea or water?" She folded a hand towel a few times and used it as a potholder to pull the bread out of the oven. Her cornbread was legendary back home. She put the pan on the counter to cool.

"Water's fine," he eyeballed the cornbread and she laughed.

"There's knives in that drawer by your elbow if you want to try that," she pulled a bottle of water out of the fridge and reached for a glass from a cabinet.

"I think I will," he grabbed a plate from the stack on the drainboard.

"You may want to use a fork, it's really buttery, also, you know, hot," she added ice to his glass and cracked open the water bottle. As she poured the water over the ice she watched him slice the cornbread and take a small bite. Adina would be lying if she said watching people eat the food she made wasn't one of the best parts. She loved to cook.

He was silent for a second, but his eyes were dancing as they held hers. Finally he nodded slowly, "Yeah, that's pretty fantastic."

She laughed, "You sound relieved," she said as she handed him his water. Their fingers brushed and she was proud of herself for not shivering.

"Well you never know when someone says they're going to make dinner."

"Haha, you thought I was going to feed you burnt fish sticks and thousand island dressing?" She stirred the beans, using the spoon to mash some against the side of the pot. It was thickening nicely, maybe ten more minutes. She reached for the cabinet next to the stove for a few bowls. When she glanced at him he looked back at his water quickly and she wondered if he'd been staring at her boobs. She felt her cheeks darkening in a blush.

"That sounds vile." He took another bite of the cornbread.

"And that's why I know how to cook," she put the two bowls on the counter in front of the rice cooker and spooned some rice into each bowl.

"Who did that to you?" He was laughing with her, that was good, she reasoned.

"My mom was a terrible cook, her favorite thing to make was chicken pastry, only she liked to make her own noodles and they were too thick so it was like chicken glue." She shivered, the memory of the taste still giving her the heaves years later. "It was...pretty terrible."

"Sounds like it," he took a sip of the water. "Can I do anything?"

"Nope, beans will be ready in about...eight minutes, we have beverages, and there's ice cream in the freezer if we want dessert." She grinned, "All you have to do is enjoy."

He couldn't help the way his eyes traveled over her body when she said that. There was a pause as the deeper meaning to her words hit the room, he was pleased that rather than be embarrassed her grin turned into a warmer smile. Finally he managed to say "I think I can do that."

"Good," the kitchen wasn't that large, she was only a few feet from him. She jerked her chin at his plate of half eaten corn bread. "Can you cut me a piece of that?"

"I thought you were going to wait," he teased, but he was reaching for the plates again.

Adina leaned her hip on the counter, "I changed my mind."

Mathias cut a square of the bread and slid it onto a plate for her. "You never told me what your book was about."

"You're right," Adina turned back to the stove and stirred the beans again.

He laughed, "Why the secrecy?"

"No reason, I guess," she turned back to him and reached for the second plate of cornbread. "I write erotica." She took the second fork and helped herself to a bite of the buttery, corn goodness, but her eyes didn't leave his face. She was impressed that his expression didn't change.

"So, what like porn for housewives?" He took a sip of his water.

"No," She flicked a piece of hair behind her ear. "Porn is porn for housewives. Erotica is romance with a heavier focus on sex. I could give you a speech about female empowerment and sexuality, but I won't. It's something I enjoy and I'm good at it."

"Ah," he tipped his head, "So...the resource books that nearly killed you?"

"One of them is The Guide to Getting it On, which I highly recommend as a sex manual no matter how much you think you know. The rest is actually Renaissance history text. My latest book is set in Borgia Rome."

"Cool," he took another bite of the cornbread, "So, what you didn't say anything because you were afraid I was going to steal your sex manual?" His teasing tone made her giggle and then she immediately wondered what the hell she was doing giggling. She never giggled.

"Yes. Obviously." She turned back to the stove, the beans were ready. She ladled a few spoonfuls into each bowl. When she turned back to the counter to place one in front of him she smiled ruefully, "I'm used to people getting judgey when they find out what I write. Or saying something stupid about how easy it must be because there's nothing to it. Like, oh what so you did that in a weekend? It's not like it's _work_ like a _real_ book. So I don't make a big deal out of it usually."

"I see," he pulled some spoons from the silverware drawer and put one in front of her place. She smiled her thanks as she settled on the stool opposite him and reached for her own water glass. "So do I pass?"

"What do you mean?"

"You told me, so was my response okay?" he poured the rest of the water from his bottle into the glass and put a napkin in his lap.

"Better than expected, yeah," She put a napkin in her own lap and stirred her beans and rice together. "So why didn't you tell me you were a police officer?"

That smirk again, "You didn't ask," he lifted a spoonful of the beans to his lips and Adina was struck with how sensual watching a man eat could be. He wasn't _trying_ to put on a show, she didn't think. but the way he blew softly on the spoon, putting all his attention on it, delicately taking the piece of sausage from the end of the spoon and chewing thoughtfully. It was hot, she decided.

"It must be a tough job," she said, forcing herself to stop staring at him like he was a last meal.

Mathias nodded slowly, "It can be. Mostly it's frustrating." he took a bite from the spoon and closed his eyes in appreciation. "This is also amazing."

"Thank you," she couldn't help the grin. She realized it was warm and reached for her hair, pulling it back into an approximation of a bun. She reached with her free hand for the hair tie that was on the counter. His fingers stopped her.

"Leave it down," he said softly, his fingers gentle on her knuckles. He shook his head, pulling his hand back, "I'm sorry."

"Why," Adina murmured, her fingers sliding away from the hair tye, she let her hair tumble back around her shoulders.

"I like it down," he said, and was she crazy or were his cheeks very red?

"Uhm," she blushed herself, and took a large bite of the cornbread to hide it. "Thank you," she made herself say.

"I mean it's your hair, do what you want," he muttered, taking an overlarge bite of the red beans and rice.

Adina bit her lip to keep from laughing a little, it was cute really. Just so very unexpected. "I'll leave it down."

They ate in silence for a while the clink of the utensils in the bowls the only sounds. Eventually he coughed to break the silence. "So…"

"So…" Adina cast around for something to say, "Are you single?" And then immediately flinched, "I did not used to be this terrible at this, I swear."

He laughed, really laughed. Not, she hoped, at _her_ so much. But you never know. "It's okay, yeah, I'm single."

"Good." She took a sip of water and coughed herself, "that's, I mean, that's good."

"You?"

"Yeah," After that it was easier. Whatever awkward tension seemed to evaporate and they talked about almost everything, it felt like. Her nervousness at taking an extended vacation in Wyoming of all places when she was used to cities like New Orleans or New York. His frustration on the Rez, trying to get people to take him seriously after the corruption. Her life after her parents died, moving around like some kind of hobo and finally settling in New Orleans. His choice to return to the Reservation after college, even though it didn't really seem like a choice to him. The Casino. Her being published for the first time, then the second.

He refilled his bowl and ate more cornbread. She refilled their water glasses twice and eventually they went for the ice cream. Moving the dirty bowls out of the way and eating the chocolate peanut butter swirl ice cream straight out of the container. Eventually she got up to start cleaning the kitchen and he followed, drying when she washed, going through cabinets to find tupperware to put away the leftovers.

"Holy shit, it's two o'clock." She couldn't believe it. They'd been talking for hours. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean that like-I mean it's two o'clock."

He laughed and his fingers covered hers on the table. his hand was warm and she turned hers over without thinking, so she could lace her fingers with his. She blushed and moved to pull away but his fingers tightened in hers. "It's late. Should I go?"

"I mean…" she ran her other hand through her hair, "if you want to, I guess. It's late and it's a weeknight, do you work tomorrow?"

"Yeah," He murmured, his thumb was rubbing a gentle circle on the palm of her hand.

She realized they were speaking quietly, somehow they'd gone from talking in regular speaking voices to that tone people got right before they started kissing. And he was holding her hand. Oh god, she thought, she was going to kiss him if he didn't kiss her.

He rose, not releasing her hand, he walked the few steps around the counter and stopped in front of her. Adina got up as well, "I guess I'll walk you out," she said softly.

"Okay," he let her lead him outside to the porch. The porchlight wasn't on, but the street lights were bright enough to see. She stopped at the porch columns, leaning against one and staring at their fingers still laced together. He felt his lips pulling into another smile and he leaned against the same column, so they were inches apart. The square shape of the column and the house's high rosemary bushes meant they couldn't really be seen from the street. "Thank you for dinner."

"I'm glad you liked it," she said quietly, she was looking up at him through her lashes, there was a little light spilling out from the house, but behind the column they were thrown in shadow. Her fingers flexed in his and she rested her head against the wood column, "I should probably give you my number so you can text me you got home okay."

Mathias laughed gently, "That's what I'm supposed to say, I think."

"I'm already home," she pointed out, "And you've got a drive that includes casino traffic. They're probably all drunk by now."

"Mm, good point," with his free hand he reached up to touch her hair. It was soft under his fingers. He was suddenly very interested in curling a tendril around his finger. "I'll probably die in a fiery ball of death."

"Yep." She was grinning in spite of herself. "Fiery death. You gotta take my number."

"You're right." He was inching closer to her. He let the curl slide off his finger so he could trace her cheek.

She shivered, there was just enough of a chill in the air for her to regret not putting on shoes. Adina lifted her chin the tiniest bit, hoping he'd take the hint and kiss her. She rested her hand on his chest, the shirt was soft under her palm. She could feel his heart thudding. "Your heart's racing," she murmured, her eyebrow quirked, "you must be terrified."

He chuckled, "Impending doom does that to a person," he felt like he was drowning in her. The rosemary bushes and her perfume-something musky but floral, was a heady mix. He wasn't purposely trying to drag this out, he wanted to kiss her, of course he did. He'd been thinking about kissing her since he'd tasted the cornbread, but he was pretty sure if he kissed her they'd go straight to the bed and he didn't want to rush this. It'd been a long time since he'd been able to talk that easily to someone.

Adina's fingers on his shirt flexed, tangling in the fabric. She pulled gently so he had to bend to her. He stopped just before his lips touched hers. She looked up at him, her teeth tugged gently at her lower lip. She lifted her chin infinitesimally. Their noses brushed gently and then her lips were under his. The kiss was soft, warm. The hand that had been touching her cheek slid into her hair, holding her head steady.

He lifted his head for a moment and she sighed. Her chest brushed his as she breathed and he dipped his head again, this time he kissed her thoroughly. Starting with small, gentle kisses at the corner of her mouth. She groaned as he nipped at her lower lip. Adina opened her mouth to him, letting him explore her. She tasted him, her tongue flicking against his, then seeking. She felt her fingers tangling in his hair. She pressed herself against him, he released her hand and his fingers played along the hem of her shirt. When he touched bare skin beneath the shirt she would have fallen if he hadn't been supporting her.

The kiss was amazing, deep and thorough. Adina couldn't remember the last time she'd been kissed like this. Her hand played down his belly, then curled around his belt, pulling him gently against her. He made a sound that could have been a moan, his lips leaving her mouth to nibble a line down her jaw to her neck. She whimpered when he nipped her, her fingers sliding around his waist to cup his ass through his jeans. She squeezed gently and it seemed to inflame him. He slid his fingers over her bare belly under her shirt and played against the underside of her breasts inside the bra. When his thumbs slid beneath the bra she made a sound that was almost a cry and fell back against the column. He turned with her so that she was backed fully against it. His thumbs were nimble, circling her hardening nipples.

"Mathias," she said his name and it was a plea. She pulled his hips more firmly against her belly, she tangled her leg around his.

His hands left her breasts and his lips claimed hers again. He reached down, curling his hands around her thighs and lifting her. She wrapped her legs around his waist and groaned, rocking her hips into his. He slid his hands under her shirt, lifting it to just above her breasts so he could kiss the flesh rising above her bra. Adina craned her neck so that she could nibble his earlobe. He groaned, rocking his jean clad hips into hers.

Across the street someone activated a car alarm. The sharp double-honk had them freeze. he lifted his head, glancing quickly across the street to ensure it was all well, and then he caught her eye in the shadows. They were breathing hard, her lips were swollen. If he wasn't mistaken she was going to have a few hickies tomorrow. That was new, he hadn't done something like that since he was a teenager. "Adina-"

"I know," she smiled softly, "you're going to go."

"I want to come back."

"You could just stay," she said gently. "You don't have to leave."

"Adina," he closed his eyes, resting his forehead against hers. His voice saying her name filled her belly with something warm. She was so turned on she could hardly focus. She rocked her hips against his again and could feel his own arousal. He laughed softly, his hands went to her hips so that he could ease her legs from his waist. "Adina," he said her name again, his lips skimmed her temple, small kisses down her jaw. "I have to go."

"Okay," she smoothed her hands down his shirt. "Why?"

"You have to ask?" He pressed his hips briefly against her again.

She laughed softly, "That's sortof why I wanted you to stay."

"I'll be back," he promised, kissing her soundly again. When the kiss broke he nibbled her ear, "I want to take you to dinner, maybe dancing." he floundered, "I don't know, something."

She curled her hand around his jaw, her thumb teasing his lip, "You're trying to seduce me?"

"Maybe," he kissed her lips quickly. "Will you let me?"

"Maybe," she stood a little on tiptoe so they were at eye level. She arched her neck and her lips pulled into a smile. "You know what this means?"

"What?" He found he was smiling himself. One of those huge, shit-eating grins that showed all his teeth.

Her fingers twitched on his ass, sliding into his back pocket and pulling his hips against her again. "You really _do_ think I'm pretty."


	3. Chapter 3

Adina parked her Jeep in the half-full public parking lot just off the town square. Downtown Durant was cute, she had to admit. If she were in a better frame of mind she'd stop for coffee at the cafe or something. She'd tried to write this morning but so far wasn't able to find a good groove for her characters. She'd slammed her laptop shut, put on the slouchiest clothes she could find, and decided fuck-all she was going shopping.

She knew part of the problem was she'd gotten very little sleep before the alarm went off this morning. Of course, she wasn't sorry for the lack of sleep at all. Mathias had called her, rather than text when he'd gotten home. She'd already been in bed reading when the phone rang and something about the sound of his voice in her ear in the almost-dark of the bedroom created a kind of bubble. They hadn't chatted about anything in particular, once he'd teasingly established that he was home and in one piece, he'd asked what she was doing, she'd told him, he'd asked her to read to him while he got ready for bed- _read to him, seriously_ -and because she liked a challenge, she did.

The fact that what she'd been reading was the latest Sasha White BDSM novel wasn't really _that_ big a deal. She'd been highly amused when she got to the spanking scene and he'd made her stop, his voice cracking a little. She'd laughed, she had warned him, afterall. And then his voice had changed and she'd heard bed clothes rustle and she knew he was climbing into bed himself. _Well, read to_ _ **me**_ _, then_ ,she'd commanded softly, _if your books are so much better_.

 _I don't know about better,_ he'd laughed, _just not as charged._

 _Spanking not your thing?_ she'd teased, partly because it amused her, but also because she was genuinely curious now.

 _I think under the right set of circumstances I'd enjoy spanking you,"_ he said seriously and she immediately giggled and hid her face behind her hand even though he wasn't actually in the room.

 _Please read to me_. Adina said softly, finally, because there was no way she was going to be able to follow _that_ without turning into phone sex or something and she didn't want to rush him if he wanted to take things slower. She'd heard more rustling, she fancied she could see him moving around pillows and such to get comfortable, then reaching the sound of pages turning as he opened his book to the appropriate place.

And started reading to her about the correct procedure for cleaning a handgun. She'd called him a jerk and he'd laughed. The sound of his laughter tripped down her spine and filled her belly with warmth.

 _Seriously_ , she said, turning off the bedside light so only the light from the street illuminated her bedroom. _Tell me a story_.She settled into the blankets and turned onto her side resting the phone on the pillow next to her. _I like the sound of your voice._

 _Oh yeah?_ His tone was just slightly amused, but she could tell she'd pleased him.

 _Yeah,_ she'd sighed, snuggling a little deeper into the blankets.

And so he'd told her a story. Something about being a kid and going fishing. She didn't remember the events so much as the cadence of his voice. He talked her to sleep, she knew that much. She didn't remember how the story ended because she'd drifted off right about the time he was talking about how to find the best worms for the hooks.

There was a fabric store on the square that sold yarn, she'd seen it when she drove in yesterday. The old timey bell tinkled above the door as she let herself in. An older woman sat behind the counter and she called a hello before going back to her knitting. Adina smiled at her and then took in the shop. It was definitely old fashioned, but it was nice, bolts and bolts of fabric in the middle of the store, notions hanging on the wall, she could see the yarn in the back so she made her way there. Crochet was her thing, more specifically lace making. It was something she'd picked up in Scotland and she'd never lost the habit. Something about the minute details and keeping her hands busy made the rest of her mind able to muddle out creative problems.

It was the best thing for her writer's block usually.

The shop had a _lot_ of yarn. Floor to ceiling cubbies lined the back of the shop and it looked like they were all artisanal skeins. No acrylics here. She grinned, this was going to be so fun. She put her hand in a cubby of fine-spun wool, it was dyed a shade of bottle green that was almost emerald. Distantly she was aware that the shop bell tinkled again and there was the same greeting from the lady behind the counter. She didn't care, next to the wool in her hand was another cubby of skeins made from recycled sari silks. She loved working with those kinds of yarns even though the weight was heavier than what she needed for lacework. The colors were just so amazing. She lifted a skein of that and tapped it against her chin, debating. She could always make a shawl instead of lace-lace, she reasoned.

She could hear the new customer moving around in the yarn section as well and she stepped back from the cubbies so as to give them space while she went over possible projects in her head. Maybe she could make a purse or something to give to Trisha for the loan of the bungalow. Trisha would love the sari silk, she knew. She'd need probably three skeins, she reached for two more, trying to find three that had similar coloring.

"You fell asleep on me."

The voice was right next to her ear. Adina jumped, skeins of yarn going flying. She shouted something that was either "whaaaaat" or "holy fuck tits", probably the second one but she hoped not for the lady at the counter's sake. She whirled, Mathias was so close she could read his badge number, amusement played around his eyes and he was smirking at her.

Adina smacked him in the chest with the skein she was still holding. "I'm okay," she called to the lady behind the counter because the woman was asking if she was alright. "I thought I saw a spider!" She turned her attention back to him and he was still smirking, only now his shoulders were shaking with contained laughter. "Ass," she said, bending to pick up the skeins she'd tossed.

"I'm sorry I startled you," He bent with her, picking up the bottle-green ball of fine-spun and handing it back to her.

"You are not," she said, her heart was still pounding, but she was able to laugh with him at least. "What are you even doing here?" She leaned against the cubbies and shot a look past him, the woman behind the counter was back to her knitting but Adina could tell she was aware of the two of them.

"Sheriff's office is above this place. I had some business," He dipped his head so he was looking her more fully in the eye, "I saw you walk in-you looked distracted."

"I was," She grinned, fighting the urge to kiss him. "I was thinking about this guy who called me at two thirty in the morning."

"Poor guy," he said solemnly, "you didn't even let him finish his story."

Adina fiddled with one of the buttons on his shirt, her eyes teasing him. "Yeah, about that," she said, but then a thought occurred to her and she clenched her fingers in his shirt, "Oh god, did I snore? I was totally snoring wasn't I?"

He was laughing at her, silently, but he wasn't even trying to pretend otherwise. He leaned in, resting his forehead briefly against hers. "You did a little."

"Oh god," she groaned, lifting the sari skeins to her face to hide behind. "I'm so sorry."

"Uh-huh," He teased, "See if I ever tell you about my childhood again."

"You were telling me the plot from an episode of the Andy Griffith Show," she shot back.

"I was not," he looked affronted at the idea, but his eyes were still dancing.

"You were so," she stepped primly past him to go look at the hand carved crochet hooks on the wall. "The one where Opie and his friends decide to sell worms and cut them in half to make more money."

He threw back his head and laughed, really laughed. Adina grinned, his laughter was a heady thing. "You caught me." Mathias flicked one of the hooks on the display. "You do this?"

"Yep," she inspected one of the thicker hooks. She preferred steel to wood, but she enjoyed purchasing the hand carved wooden hooks and using them in her hair. She wasn't about to tell him that, though. "It helps me think, my book is pissing me off."

"The book you came up here to work on, or the book you were reading last night?"

Adina shot him a look out of the corner of her eye, "The first one. I'm having a hard time focusing on characters. It's frustrating."

"I'll bet," he opened his mouth to say something else, but his cell phone beeped. Rolling his eyes his mouth twisted at her as he answered. She turned her attention back to the crochet hooks to give him some privacy. He turned away from her, focusing his attention on whoever was on the line, but his hand strayed to the belt loop of her jeans, he hooked his finger there, holding her but not really. Adina smiled, it was nice to feel wanted.

She grabbed a pair of wooden purse handles to go with the sari silks and turned back to the cubbies where the green fine-spun was. She'd need another skein of that as well for the other project. His fingers didn't leave her belt loop, he continued his call, but walked the few steps back with her. It was interesting having a full-grown man attached to her hip. She eyeballed a few skeins of undyed homespun but nixxed the idea, she had at least fifty dollars in her hands anyway, no reason to go on a full scale yarn-binge. The shop wasn't going anywhere.

"Mm-hm. Yeah, no. Okay, I'll be out in a bit." Mathias ended his call and slid his phone back into his pocket.

"You need to leave," She said, reaching for a higher cubby that had a shade of the green wool in a slightly darker hue.

"I do," He sounded apologetic. "Let me take you to dinner," he put his hands on her hips, turning her gently to face him.

"Tonight?" She wondered what one wore to dinner in a town this small.

"Sure," he made a face, "is eight okay?"

"I can be ready by eight." She couldn't help that she was grinning like a crazy person. Or that she was blushing.

"Good," his lips curved into the same smirk and she was torn between wanting him to know he didn't "have" her yet and wanting to throw her arms around his neck and kiss him stupid.

It was better her arms were full of yarn so she couldn't even if she wanted to. They were staring at each other, Adina knew how they must look if the lady behind the counter was still watching. She wished she could stop the grin on her face, she really did. She laughed, shaking her head, "You gotta go."

"Yeah I do," he stepped back and she resisted the urge to sigh. He shook his head, "So eight?"

"Yep," she wanted him to kiss her goodbye, but there's no way they were there yet.

"Mathias, Sheriff's outside," the lady behind the counter called, cutting off whatever he was going to say.

Adina laughed because the whole situation _was_ comical. "Let me enjoy watching you walk away and go be a hero somewhere," she said, waving him at the front door. He shook his head, laughing with her and turned away, sauntering off down the aisle. She took a moment to actually appreciate, not even trying to hide it. It was cute the way he waved to the lady behind the counter. Not like he knew her, but fully aware she'd _totally_ been paying attention to everything that had just happened. Better than a security camera, even.

She made her way to the register and put her acquired bundle on the polished wood counter. The woman set her knitting aside and gave Adina a knowing look over her reading glasses. Adina smirked and jerked her head at Mathias through the window. "I like watching him walk away," she said almost apologetically.

The lady laughed appreciatively as she rung up Adina's purchases. "Honey, with a tight little ass like that, it'd be hard not to."


	4. Chapter 4

"Tell me I'm not an idiot for wearing this dress, Trish," Adina stared at herself in the mirror hanging on the inside of the closet door and debated.

" _Come on, Adina, you know that dress is gorgeous_ ," Trisha's voice sounded tinny over the speakerphone. Adina had texted her a few minutes ago in a panic, a quick selfie of the dress captioned _too much, right?_

"Well I mean I know it's gorgeous, but is it too much?" She was wearing a dress that was technically underwear. Well, underwear in the 19th century. One of the plus sides to living in New Orleans was the thriving thrift store culture. Even after Katrina, it seemed like cool shit just _found_ that town. She had discovered the dress in a costume bin at her favorite thrift store and bought it without trying it on for a buck twenty five. It was actually an under-dress. She liked to pretend it was owned by one of the prostitutes who populated Storyville, but she could be making that up entirely. She'd had to cut off the bottom part of it because of staining, and rehem. But the majority of the lace had survived. It fit like a chemise or a slip up top, with a few buttons and some lace work around the bodice, and then it flared just at her natural waist and had what Trish liked to call a "twirly skirt".

Adina had to wear underwear with the dress, if she spun to quickly it flared and _definitely_ showed her ass. But it was gorgeous, the silk was a delicate rose pink that made her skin look positively milky, and the lacework had probably originally been an off-white but it had aged to a nice tea-stained brown. She wore a strapless bra with it and matching underwear, sexy but understated, the dress was the star of the show and honestly she wasn't sure he was even going to see her underwear yet. Unless he took her dancing, but then everyone would, she figured.

" _It's not too much, you look like a million dollars and the man isn't going to let you out of the house. You're going to fuck on the window seat and order a pizza._ " Trisha cackled, " _But it's not like that wasn't your plan anyway._ "

"Nah-uh," Adina said, petulant. She even stuck her tongue out at the phone for good measure, not that her friend could see. "Flats?"

" _He's short, right_?"

"He's not _short."_

" _Everybody's taller than you, short stack_." Trisha laughed again, Adina hadn't called her freaking out about a date since senior year, she was enjoying this.

"Okay, fine, he's short for a guy."

" _Cowboy boots and a jean jacket._ " Trisha said without skipping a beat.

"You don't think that's pandering? Also I don't own cowboy boots." Adina wasn't going to go all "denim and lace" just because she was in Wyoming, that wasn't her style at all. "I'm trying on the brown biker thing."

" _Oh the brown biker thing! I like that!_ " Trish was chewing something that sounded like it was probably potato chips.

Adina pulled a brown jacket from the closet. It was a heavy sweatshirt material but it was cut to look like a biker jacket. She would wear a pair of gold flats to match. She finished it off with a pair of pearl studs in her ears. She went light with the makeup again. Trish was right, she looked hot. Like, _hot_. "I'm debating lipstick, what do you think if I'm going light?"

" _Nah, you did your eyes, right? Maybe some gloss._ " Trish munched more chips.

"You're right, okay I'm done. He should be here soon. I'm gonna go."

" _What the hell, you aren't going to send me a pic_?" Trisha laughed, " _You totally just used me as a focus group._ "

"Yeah, I kinda did. I look hot. You helped. Thank you!" Adina made a smacking kiss sound at the phone.

" _Okay, fine, blow him good for me_!"

She hung up the phone and shook her head, she loved Trish because they were pretty equally outspoken. Usually. Adina wasn't sure why talk like that over Mathias made her feel weird. Well, maybe not weird, more like...okay it was because she was seriously into him, she'd admit it. She considered pulling her hair up and then decided to twist it up into a sloppy chignon and use a crochet hook to hold it up. Tendrils fell around her face and it would be easy enough to take down if he wanted her to. Or, she thought with a wicked smile, she might let _him_ take it down.

She swished in front of the mirror studying the effect of the whole outfit. Yeah. Hot. It occurred to her that Trish was probably right, they might actually have sex tonight. She went back into the living room, there was an extra box from one of her bureau drawers in there with her crappy, super comfortable "no man sees these ever" panties, her Hitachi, some lotions and a box of condoms. It was probably a good idea to go ahead and unpack all that. Since she was waiting for him anyway.

Adina tossed the box on the bed and opened the bedside drawer. There was an old tv guide in there and a few napkins. She wondered if Trish had ever actually lived in this place. If it were her apartment this drawer would be stuffed full of movie theater tickets, half used lip glosses, scribbled notes, and maybe a my little pony action figure. It was good it was so empty, though, it made her job a lot easier. Adina slid the Hitachi, the lotions, and the condoms into the bedside drawer. The box with the panties she got down on her knees to slide under the bed. Then she thought maybe she should just plug in the Hitachi since she was down there anywhere. She slid out of the jacket so she could maneuver better down there and reached up into the drawer and grabbed the cord, then crawled back under the bed, fumbling for the outlet. She'd just managed to plug it in when the doorbell rang.

"Of course," she muttered, fwumping back out from under the bed, the crochet hook digging into her scalp. She got up and dusted herself off, hoping her outfit wasn't ruined. She tossed the jacket on the bed, and a quick glance in the mirror reassured her she was okay, even if she had more curls tendriling around her hair. Which, actually was probably a good thing. She smoothed her skirts and made for the door.

He rang the bell once more as she was leaving the bedroom. Adina laughed, shaking her head as she opened the door, "Impatient, much?"

"Hey…" He fell back a step and took her in from the gold shoes to the lace hem of the dress and up. His eyes stopped at her breasts and Adina glanced down, when she'd gone crawling under the bed a few of the buttons had come undone, she was showing a healthy expanse of skin. The brown jacket was still lying on the bed. She realized maybe she looked half naked and blushed.

"I have a jacket I can go get," she said, moving out of the doorway so he could come inside. She reached for the buttons of the dress, absently buttoning them back.

Mathias walked inside, she noticed he'd changed his shirt so he wasn't in the uniform any longer. The tee shirt and jean jacket suited him, she decided. "You look…" he trailed off, looking a little mystified.

"Too much? I didn't bother to ask you where we were going, have a seat, I can change," She made a move to run back to the bedroom and he grabbed her wrist.

"Adina," he pulled her gently so she was standing in front of him. "You look…" he turned his head so he could make a show of letting his eyes trail over her body, " _really_ good." He put his other hand on her hip and the silk of the dress was thin enough she could feel the warmth of his hand through the fabric. Her skin broke out in goosebumps.

"Yeah?" She smiled slowly, it was so weird that she was almost _shy_ around him.

"Oh yeah," he was still looking at her body, "wow."

Adina giggled, snaking her arms around his neck. "Thank you," he brought his other hand to her body, it curved at her waist and he slid his palms gently over her sides, seeming to enjoy the feel of the silk. "Are you going to say hello?" She asked, her lips curving into a smirk.

He shook his head as though to clear it and made himself look her in the eye. His lips were inches from hers. He leaned slightly into her, so his lips hovered over hers, "Hello," he murmured softly before covering her lips with his.

Adina sighed into his mouth, her fingers tangling into his hair. "Hi," she said, turning her head to angle closer to him. The kiss deepened and his hand slid down her side, reaching behind her to curve over her ass. She groaned, her thumbs caressing his jaw bones. He pulled her closer and she felt her nipples hardening. His other hand cupped her breast and she took a step back, guiding him slowly to the couch.

He lifted his head momentarily and she nodded at the couch, her lips finding his neck. Mathias chuckled, but let her lead him. When they reached the sofa he sank onto the cushions and pulled her on top of him. Adina kicked her shoes off and climbed up, straddling his lap. She sank down onto him and he jerked under her, his fingers sliding under her skirt to hold her hips. Her lips found the pulse beating in his neck and he moaned, his fingers tightening on her hips. Adina rocked, sliding against his jeans so that his zipper pressed against her more intimate places. He muttered a curse and kissed her shoulder, his teeth raking just the tiniest bit on her shoulder bone.

She rose up over him, gasping for breath, then falling back, rocking in a gentle rhythm against him. His hips mimicked hers, rubbing. She met his eyes and they burned. Adina swallowed, bit her lip, tried to find her voice. She groaned when his fingers slid above her hip, curving over the bones of her ribs. "Mathias," she whispered, leaning down to kiss his lips again, then rest her forehead against his. She kept the gentle, rocking pressure because it felt too good to stop just yet. If they were going out to dinner she was going to have to go into the bedroom to get a new pair of panties. She laughed softly, her lips brushing his cheek, "I thought you wanted to slow down?"

He groaned, "I did," his lips found the base of her neck and he kissed her again, a quick, open mouthed kiss. She shifted, her rhythm changing once, quick fast, then slow, long strokes. Then again, fast, then slow. He made a noise that could have been a growl and nipped her skin, a little harder than before. He licked the place his teeth nipped her and she sighed. He laughed, "I can't remember why."

"Mm," she reached, her hands sliding under his jean jacket. He leaned forward, shouldering out of it for her. When his arms were free he reached up, wrapping his arms around her and moving her bodily so she was lying on the couch. She gasped when he rose above her, arching her neck in invitation. His lips traveled down the column of her neck, sucking, nipping, licking. "God, keep doing that," she said, shaking her head against the couch cushions.

His lips traveled lower, to the skin of her chest. One of the dress straps slid off her shoulder and he followed it, his lips closing over the swell of her breast. She moaned, swiveling her hips to find his, her leg falling off the couch so she could open further. "Adina," her name was a sigh on his lips and she fought the urge to beg. She reached down, grabbing one of his fingers, pulling his hand up to her lips. He lifted his eyes briefly to watch as she placed an open-mouthed kiss on the palm, then guided his hand down, down, then under the skirt to her aching body.

"Please," she said, holding his hand against her ruined underwear. His fingers found the waistband and she moaned. She wanted to say more, to fill the quiet with words telling him what he could do to her, what he should do to her. She rocked against his hand, it'd been so long since she'd done anything like this. She fumbled her fingers in her own skirts, nearly losing it completely when he worked one of her breasts out of bra. His lips closed over her nipple and she thought she'd see stars.

Adina's fingers found his belt and she pulled his shirt free. He made a noise against her breast and pushed his hips against hers. She toyed with his belt and then slid her fingers under the waist of his jeans. He stilled above her for a second, his head lifting so that he could find her eyes. Adina watched his face as her fingers slid between his jeans and his shorts and his skin, finding him, holding him gently, then shifting him up so his arousal wasn't pressing into his jeans. She curled her fingers around him, sliding up and down, gentle, then more firmly, up and down.

He couldn't stop his hips mimicking her movement. He claimed her lips again, the kiss hard. "Fuck," Adina whimpered, his fingers were finding places, rubbing quickly, firmly. She was so wet, it'd been so long since she'd been this wet. "Please, baby," she was finding it hard to breathe. He slid his fingers inside her and she sighed raggedly.

Mathias's other hand took her wrist, gently pulling her hand from his jeans. She made a soft sound, her hips jerking in defiance and he laughed, grabbing her other wrist with the same hand and sliding them over her head. Adina thrashed on the couch, his fingers were working her, his thumb found her clit. She was going to climax soon, she could feel it. He held her hands so that she couldn't touch him and his lips found her ear. He nibbled at her earlobe. "You want that?" His voice was ragged and she sobbed an approximation of a yes. "You gonna come for me?"

She pressed her foot into the floorboards, forcing her pelvis more firmly against his hand. She could still feel his arousal through the jeans against her thigh. She thrashed her head on the couch and his fingers kept up, faster.

"Tell me, Adina."

"God," she bit her lip, "You're going to make me come." She squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head, rubbing her cheek against her arm.

"You don't want that?" He sounded amused, his teeth nibbled at her neck. She thrashed her head again. "Tell me what you want, Adina."

"I want," his thumb stopped frigging her and tapped wetly against her clit. She sobbed. "Oh god," She arched her neck and her eyes found his, "Let me come with you inside me."

His fingers flexed inside her and he kissed her lips, hard. "I am inside you, baby," his teeth tugged gently at her nipple.

"That's not what I mean," she laughed and it was a ragged sound. "Mathias," she was rocking her hips with the rhythm his fingers created. She was going to go over the edge and she wouldn't be able to stop herself. "Please."

"Hey," he released her hands and cupped her jaw, angling her head so she was looking him in the eye. She realized she was blinking back tears. "Hey, it's okay," his lips pressed against her temple and his fingers slowed, but only a little. "We've got time, okay?"

"Yeah?" She felt like she was losing it. If she didn't climax soon she was going to go crazy.

"Yeah," his lips found hers again, soft, gentle kisses. "You're so wet, Adina."

"Yeah," she laughed, "I'm almost there."

"I know," he nipped her lower lip and she whimpered. "Come for me," he kissed her forehead, then her cheek, his lips mapping her skin. "Let me watch you come for me."

She sighed when his hand cupped her other breast, working it free of the bra. His fingers tugged her nipple gently.

"What is it, Adina?" His lips covered the fleshy part of her breast, "Tell me."

She reached for his hand, the one he was playing against her bare sex. He let her pull it free, watched her as she took his fingers into her mouth, licking them clean, sucking gently.

"Fuck, Adina," his hips ground into hers and she sighed.

"That," she said, releasing his wrist and fumbling for his ass through the jeans. "Give me that." He shifted, pressing the hard ridge of his jeans against her sex. Adina gasped, her eyes piercing him. "Make me come."

One of his legs was off the couch, his knee was pressing into the floorboards. Adina curled her leg around his thigh, urging her body more tightly against his. She pulled him to her, her fingers tangling in his hair as it fell around her face, her teeth scraped his neck. When the orgasm hit her she screamed once, waves rolling through her so powerful all she could do was close her teeth over his shoulder and buck beneath him. Her whole body was shaking, He held her through it, his hips not stopping that steady rhythm. She sobbed into his shirt, pressing her forehead into his neck. He was whispering words of encouragement, she knew he was, but she had no idea what he was saying. Stars were dancing behind her closed eyes.

She fell back to earth in inches, becoming aware slowly of little things. Like how her skirts were rucked up around her waist. How he didn't actually come himself she didn't think. The way he was placing soft, gentle kisses all along her collar bones. "Mathias," she said softly and his name was a song on her lips.

"That was amazing," he said softly, kissing her lips. "Thank you."

She furrowed her brow, "But you didn't…" She tangled her fingers in his shirt, letting him lift her, letting him curl her body and settle it in his lap. She rested her forehead against the column of his neck. "I wanted you to come too," she said quietly, her thumb circling his pebbled nipple through the tee shirt. She could still feel his arousal through the jeans, but he was softening.

"I told you," he angled her chin up so he could kiss her again, long and deep. "We got plenty of time, okay?" She nodded slowly and he grinned, flicking her nose gently with his thumb. "Let's get cleaned up, I'm taking you to dinner."


	5. Chapter 5

They took her Jeep. She locked the house door and tossed him the keys, mainly because a summer night in Wyoming felt more like winter in New Orleans and Adina wanted to use her Jeep's heated seats. He laughed at her, but she didn't care. The upside to a mind-shattering orgasm. He opened the passenger door for her and saw her safely in before circling the vehicle to climb behind the wheel.

Adina's fingers curled around his bare forearm on the seat rest and her nails scratched lightly on his skin. When his hand wasn't shifting gears he let his fingertips draw easy circles on her bare knee. She darted a glance at his profile. "Where are you taking me?"

"Why you gotta know everything?" He glanced at her when he braked for a stop light and she smiled, rolling her eyes at him.

"Is it a surprise?" She asked, her voice slightly taunting.

Mathias laughed, "What if I told you we were getting takeout and eating on the mountain somewhere?"

"I'd tell you we're either making a fire, or we're turning around so I can put on pants." She reached over and ticked up her seat's warmer a few notches to punctuate her point.

"You can _not_ be that cold."

"The hell you say, you wanna know what the weather felt like in New Orleans when I left town?"

"Nope," he chuckled, shaking his head as he flipped the Jeep's turn signal. "What do you mean 'we're' making a fire."

"I mean 'we'." She shot him a look, "I mean it's been a few years, but I think I remember how kindling works."

"When were you making fires?" They were leaving the residential neighborhood and going toward the highway.

"Scotland," She rested her head against the car seat and stared out the window at the passing scenery. "We burned peat for heat."

"Ah," he was mimicking her, lightly scratching the flesh on the inside of her thigh. "Scotland?" She turned back from the scenery and grinned at him.

"Mm," she rested the heel of her foot on the car seat, her skirt puddling in her lap and covering his hand. "When I graduated college I didn't know what I wanted to do. There are some great programs for twentysomethings who want to travel but can't pay. I ended up in the Hebrides working for a farmer. I got a wage, room, and board. It was pretty great." She wiggled her eyebrows at him, "I learned stuff."

"I did not figure you for the type to work on a farm." his nails were sliding a little higher on her thigh, taking the silent invitation.

"Oh no?" Adina laughed, "I was there for two years, it was...pretty remote." Her hand snaked down from the console where his arm rested, her fingers curling around his thigh. She felt a muscle jump under her palm and she bit her lip.

"I thought you were a city girl," He was turning the Jeep into a half-full parking lot. A bar, there were plenty of people outside of it, smoking, talking.

"I am," she removed her hand from his thigh, sitting back in the seat and putting her leg down. His fingers moved from her thigh so he could park. "That doesn't mean I can't be other places sometimes."

His eyes flicked to her and he smirked nodding once, "Good to know." He turned off the car engine and unbuckled his seatbelt. She would have said something else but he kissed her, once, hard. The kiss was over entirely too quickly for her, but it was a promise. She fell back against the seat as he got out of the SUV, unbuckling her seatbelt with one hand and resting her index finger against her bottom lip. She watched him walk around the front of the vehicle, he nodded once to someone she couldn't see, then opened her door for her. Adina slid out as gracefully as she could, swishing her skirts back into place as she did.

"So can I ask you a question?" She said, leaning back into the Jeep to grab her purse.

"You can ask," he was leaning against the door, watching her. She glanced over her shoulder and grinned, more specifically he was watching her ass. She laughed, shaking her head as she slid back out of the Jeep. She stepped back while he slammed the door and slung her purse over her shoulder. When he turned back to her she stepped toward him, hooking her fingers in his jeans pockets and pulling him gently to her. Mathias raised his eyebrows, turning his head quizzically.

She bit her lip, rising on tiptoe so that her lips were next to his ear. "When are you going to let me get down on my knees and taste you?"

He laughed, crowding her back against the door of the Jeep. He put his hands on the car, his palms resting on either side of her head. He dipped his head, "Anyone ever tell you you have a one-tracked mind?"

"I prefer to think of it as being incredibly focused," her lips pulled back into a Cheshire smile. "You haven't answered my question."

"I told you," he nipped her lower lip and she gasped, her fingers flexing in his pockets. "We've got plenty of time. You scared to walk into a bar with me?"

"Scared?" She quirked an eyebrow, the smallest of edges in her voice.

"You heard me," he nudged her nose with his, "first you…" he grinned, "distract me at the house," one of his hands strayed to the buttons on her dress and his fingers flicked the top one. It slipped from it's housing easily. "Then this?"

"You're calling what happened at the house a _distraction_?" She curled a hand in his tee shirt and rose on her toes again so she was at his eye level, "You give me, hands down, the most intense orgasm I've had in the past _ten years_ without the help of a personal massager and you want to know how that's a _distraction."_

He cocked his head, "Ten years?"

"Yeah. Ten. Years." She poked his chest with her finger, "Do with that information what you want. I wasn't _intentionally_ distracting you with that."

"My mistake," he reached over and buttoned the top button of the chemise back. "You still haven't answered the question."

Adina sighed, falling back against the Jeep, "We go in there, then we're on a date."

"Lady, you've lost me," he was still leaning against the Jeep with one hand, he wiped the other over his face.

"I don't know if you've noticed, but I really like you," she lifted one of her hands to her mouth, worrying the skin at the edge of her thumbnail with her teeth. "We go in there, maybe I make an ass of myself and you realize you're wasting your time." She laughed, "We stay at the bungalow...maybe you play with my ass a little instead and I don't think there's any bad there."

He held her gazed for a moment, then, when he realized she was serious Mathias dropped his head against her neck, unable to hide his laughter.

She rolled her eyes heavenward. "Yeah, go ahead, laugh at my insecurities." She could feel embarrassment warming her cheeks and she knew if she could have she'd be hiding by now. "Funny, funny, funny."

He lifted his head, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand, "Ah, I'm sorry," he saw the look on her face and chuckled, wrapping his hand around her jaw, using his thumb to press her chin upward. "You need me to tell you I'm into you?"

"Well I know you're _attracted_ to me, I mean have you seen this dress? I look hot." She said, half petulant, half kidding. She laughed. "I'm being really ridiculous, aren't I?"

"Oh yeah," He leaned close, his chest brushing her breasts so that he could put his lips next to her ear. "To be clear? You can get down on your knees for me anytime," he feathered kisses along her jaw, his teeth scraping lightly. Adina sighed, turning her head so that her lips could find his. Her hands slid into his hair tangling at the base of his head. When he lifted his head her lips were swollen. He angled her jaw so she was looking him in the eye again, "I am going to spend a good long time playing with your ass, since you offered," she giggled and he shook her head the tiniest bit so she'd quiet. "But I want more from you than just that, okay?"

"Yeah?" Her smile was tentative.

"Yeah." He stepped back from her and she shivered, missing his body heat. Mathias smirked, his hand tangling with hers. "Come inside, pretty girl," he lifted her hand to his lips and kissed the back of it. "Trust me."

888

 _Trust him_ , he said. Adina's head was swimming a little as they walked into the bar. _Trust him_. It wasn't that she was _incapable_ of trusting someone else, of course she was. But the last time she'd trusted a man she'd ended up broke and practically homeless in Seattle. It wasn't _him_ she didn't trust. It was her own judgement.

She absolutely trusted Mathias, any person really, to do exactly what they said they were going to do. But choosing to rely on someone not to leave her vulnerable...that was harder. It had taken a long time for her to get over Kurt's cleaning her out. Not so much financially, she'd had a steady job at the time, but being awoken by the landlord pounding on the door because nobody had paid the rent in three months was a feeling a person didn't forget.

That was a time when she'd thanked God for Trish. She'd had a couch to sleep on, at least. And someone to remind her that she wasn't the asshole in the situation. But it had taken time to bounce back. And ultimately it was why she'd settled in New Orleans. Kurt had shaken her confidence in her own judgment. And it's hard to pack up and move to parts unknown when you're not sure you can make good decisions.

It was, she mused, probably why Trish had insisted she take this place. It had been her aunt's or something and while she'd paid to have the house cleaned and maintained, it was basically just sitting empty so why _shouldn't_ Adina go? She'd been in New Orleans for five years. The longest she'd stayed in any one place since her parents died. Gratitude for Trish filled her and she made a mental note to get started on the purse sooner rather than later.

Adina loved New Orleans. But she missed this, the discovery of new places. New people. She'd been letting Mathias lead her, lost in her thoughts, but not really paying attention to her surroundings at all. They'd been seated, and she took a menu from the waitress mechanically, opening it and staring at the text, but not really seeing.

She realized they were staring at her, him and the waitress, the waitress looking polite but expectant. Adina shook herself. "I'm so sorry, uhm?"

"Drinks?" The waitress prompted, "I'll give you a few minutes to figure out what you'd like to eat, Mathias you want your usual?"

"Yeah, thanks Cady," Mathias gave Adina a searching look, "You need another minute?"

She shook her head, closing the menu, "No, thank you." She forced herself to smile, "I'll have whatever he's having, thanks. And, uhm, water with lemon?" The waitress nodded, accepted the menu back and gave Mathias a pointed look before walking away. Adina wondered just how long they'd been waiting for her to respond.

He was staring at her, eyes narrowed, "Where'd you go?"

Adina shrugged, "Nowhere special." She reached up to her hair, working the crochet hook free so her hair tumbled around her shoulders. "Sorry about that."

"No need to be sorry," he put his hand over hers on the table, "sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, I was just-mm..." she broke off, suddenly not wanting to tell him. She wasn't interested in spoiling an evening just because she'd gone maudlin for a moment. She shook her head and made herself smile, lacing her fingers through his. "What did I just order?"

"Burger and fries," his eyes flicked from her and he smiled and nodded quickly to someone over her shoulder. She fought the urge to crane her neck to see who he was acknowledging. Mathias raised an eyebrow, "Being on a date seriously freaks you out."

"I did tell you," she said, "It's not the this, or you, know, you. You're great."

"I know," he grinned quickly, flashing teeth, and she blushed. "So what is it. You didn't just take a walk in your head because you're nervous."

Adina pulled her hand away from his and made a show of inspecting the crochet hook in her hand. She'd bought it in London, it was oak and there wasn't any give to it, so she could use it to hold her curly hair forest without worrying it would snap. "Okay, I'm going to say this. And you are not allowed to freak out on me, okay?"

He gave her a look like she'd asked him to slaughter a sea cow with a pen knife. "I make no promises." He said finally.

"I just mean...okay you asked so I'm going to tell you. But I am not laying this at your feet as an expectation, okay?" He furrowed his brow, but didn't say anything. Adina realized she was being cryptic and sighed, she just needed to say it outright. "You told me to trust you. And it scares me, that's all."

"...why?" He leaned forward in his seat, his chair scraping the floor. She felt his boot touch the toe of her flat and she wondered if he was doing that on purpose.

"Because the last person I trusted really, really screwed me over. And I know you weren't saying 'trust me' like," she struck a dramatic pose to make her point, "oh trust me my love that I will show you the stars and write ballads to your eyes or any of that bullshit. I'm fully aware you meant, like, if I say a thing, I mean the thing. Or more like, trust you that this place doesn't suck. And that's cool." She was twirling the crochet hook in her left hand absently, walking it over and under her knuckles and his eyes flicked to the movement, but she could tell he was still listening. "Thing is, it's not you I don't trust, it's me. And that's what I was thinking about," she finished, sounding a little miserable.

He reached over and plucked the crochet hook from her hand. She was pleased he hadn't immediately gotten up and left her. When his eyes met hers again they were kind, but guarded. "Tell me what happened," he said, his fingers toying with the hook.

"I mean it's not a _huge_ tragedy," she grinned, "I was twenty six and I moved to Seattle and I met this guitarist. He seemed really cool, but he was a flake and I thought I could fix him. So, you know, we moved in together too fast and I was giving him money to pay rent and he wasn't paying and we got evicted." She rolled her eyes, "He skipped out because he didn't want to tell me. So I was almost homeless. I mean there was other stuff too, but nothing sinister. Just stupid kid shit."

"That's a little more than stupid kid shit," he smiled at the waitress when she brought their drinks and Adina lifted her eyes, doing same. She nodded and drifted away, leaving them to privacy.

"Well yeah," Adina shrugged, "That's when I realized I need to grow up. So I put my head down and I worked on writing and I got published. And I'm in a great place now, but I've sortof avoided relationships ever since."

"Ah," he took a sip of his beer, "So you haven't dated at all in, what, five years?"

"Six," She wondered how royally she was screwing this up. "To be fair, I've had sex since then, I'm not particularly interested in being celibate, but I've never had to remember names."

"And now?" he was using the end of the crochet hook to draw light patterns on the back of her hand.

"Honestly?" she smiled tentatively, "I sortof like saying your name."

"Oh yeah?" He leaned closer, if she wasn't mistaken his ears were tinged red, and he was smiling.

"Yeah," She bit her lip when he stopped a few inches from her, her lips curving into an approximation of a grin.

"I do like hearing my name," He said solemnly, his eyes sparkling. The moment stretched, becoming charged, tinged with something else. Adina knew she should say something, anything, but she was blanking with him so close, looking at her like that.

"Mathias." The sound of his named pulled them both back to the present. He jumped, pulling away from her like he'd been caught at something. The waitress held their food, her expression barely leashed amusement. Adina had the feeling she was going to go back to the kitchen and tell _everyone_.

"Hey Cady," he managed to sound at least a little dignified but the flush was evident on his face.

"Food's ready, Mathias," Cady said innocently, placing a plate with a massive burger and fries in front of him and then another in front of Adina. Adina was having a hard time keeping a straight face. She met the waitress's eye and the woman winked.

Adina nearly choked on her water, she coughed, waving her hand. "Thank you so much."

"Yep," the waitress shot Mathias another look, he was studiously examining his meal. She snorted, not even attempting to hide her amusement. "Let me know if you need anything else, okay, _Mathias_?"

"Thank you," Adina placed her napkin in her lap, working to get her own laughter under control. Once Cady was gone she spared a glance at him. "How you doing?"

"There was no part of that that was funny," he said, his voice sounding a little strangled. His cheeks were still flaming, but his eyes were laughing.

She rolled her eyes and gave him a look of mock seriousness, "You're absolutely right. That was totally egregious."

"Yep. Egregious."

"You should tell her boss." Adina was nodding solemnly with him. She was proud of herself that she was able to hold the expression for maybe ten seconds before dissolving into a fit of giggles in her seat. He rolled his eyes heavenward, pulling a face of sheer martyrdom. When she was able to breathe she waved her hand, then shook her head, "I'm sorry," she wheezed, "your face...oh god, I need water." She reached for her glass and he nudged it with his finger, just out of her reach. She laughed harder.

"Your sympathy touches me," he said, laughing as he reached for his burger.

"I'm a very caring person," she said, munching a french fry. "Okay this is fantastic."

He shot her a look that very clearly said 'told you so'.

"So what about you?" She took a bite of the burger and closed her eyes, making a sound of total abandon.

"What about me?" He took a sip of his beer.

"What skeletons are hiding out in your closet?"

He winked at her before munching a fry, "Yeah, keeping skeletons in the closet sounds like white people shit."

"Oh totally." she sipped her water. "So tell me about 'em."

He laughed, "One-track mind."

"Highly focused," she tossed her hair off her shoulders, "can't be any worse than mine, you know."

"Valid point," he laughed, shaking his head. "I don't really have any," he said finally.

She looked at him like he was insane, "You've _never_ had a relationship."

Mathias rolled his eyes, "I've never had one blow up in my face," he corrected, "I've had relationships, they've ended, nothing serious enough to mess with my head."

"Uh huh," she resisted the urge to ask him how old he was. "Who doesn't have at least one train wreck in their lives?"

"I don't like trains," he said seriously. There was a bull-riding machine in the corner. Adina was aware of someone being thrown and cheers from the crowd. She didn't turn, she was watching him too closely.

"So metaphors aside," she said, taking another bite of her burger. When she swallowed she gave him a long look, "Are you telling me you've never had a relationship that got to you enough that you cared when it ended, or are you telling me you've never had one last for longer than, oh, say a few weeks."

"Yes," he answered, take a quick sip of his beer. He swallowed and turned in his chair to face her fully. "Look," he put his hand on her wrist, "I get around. I like spending time with women. I make sure we both have a good time."

"But," she prompted, wondering why his words weren't giving her that hopes-dashed feeling she would've gotten if Kurt had told her this. Actually, she reflected, Kurt probably _had_ told her a variation of this same speech. Bastard.

"None of the women I've been with before have made me feel like I should call them at two thirty in the morning to let them know I got home safely."

"Oh," she couldn't help the silly grin and she tried to hide it by not looking at him but she knew she was failing miserably.

"I think it's too early to make promises, Adina," he said gently, his fingers were tracing circles around her wrist bones. "I'm not going to be that asshole."

"Okay," she put her water glass back down on the table and turned her attention back to his face. "So what are you saying?"

"I'm saying I like spending time with you. I want to get to know you better. And from there…" he shrugged, "I don't know, I've never really been much for five year plans or whatever."

"Fair enough," internally she was shrieking. It hadn't occurred to her that having this conversation meant she could potentially be in a category marked _five year plan_. Could she sign on for this tiny place for that long?

"How about you?" He finished off the beer and raised his hand to gesture to the bartender. The man nodded back in acknowledgement.

"What about me?"

"Had you thought about where this was going?" He smirked, "I mean since you brought it up."

"Uhm," she fiddled with the crochet hook where it lay forgotten on the table. She really hadn't, to be frank. She thought maybe the first official date was probably an awkward time to be having this kind of conversation anyway. She was thinking back to the boys she'd dated in her twenties. She was pretty sure if she'd _tried_ to have this conversation with any one of them then, she'd have been stuck calling a cab to get home.

"I brought you another beer, Mathias," Cady was back, she took his empty and placed the new bottle on his coaster.

"Thanks, Cady," He gave her a look that was equal parts 'ha ha funny' and 'I will murder your car later with my bare hands'.

"Can I get you anything else, Mathias?" She was grinning, "Dessert menu? Check?" She actually batted her eyes.

Adina laughed. "I have such a crush on you right now." She extended her hand, "I'm Adina Jurovics."

Cady grinned and shook her hand, "Cady Longmire."

The flush was back in his cheeks. Mathias shook his head, "Yeah, you two are probably going to be really good friends," Adina cocked her head questioningly and he laughed, "Cady, Adina lives in that old blue bungalow across the street from you."

"Oh! The one that's been vacant for so long!" Cady pulled out a chair and sat down, "That is such a _great_ house."

"Right?" Adina ran a hand through her hair. "It belongs to my friend Trish, she's loaning it to me for a while."

Cady's eyes darted between the two of them, "How long a while?"

"I'm not sure?" She laughed, "I'd planned on maybe the year, but right now I think I need to see if I can survive the fall."

"The winter may kill her," Mathias said, sipping his beer.

"Where are you from?"

"New Orleans," Adina twisted her hair up into another chignon and stabbed through it with the crochet hook. "I mean temperature wise it's only twenty degrees difference, but-"

"Oh god, the humidity!" Cady made a face.

"You've been?"

"Mardi Gras, senior year college." She wiggled her eyebrows, "I have some beads somewhere."

"God, I'm going to miss Mardi Gras," Adina sighed wistfully.

"This place must be total culture shock for you," Cady said, "You know this place and like, one other pizza delivery place on the other side of town are the only places that are open past nine o'clock, right?"

"Shit, you're joking." Adina shot Mathias a scandalized look. "She's joking, right?"

"I'm not joking," Cady pulled a check from her receipt pad and handed it to Mathias. "I'll let you two get back to your date. But you should come over sometime. I work from home when I'm not here so if my car's in the driveway, please, please bother me."

"God, yes," Adina made a face, "I love working in my pajamas, but the quiet is a killer, isn't' it?"

"The other day I realized I was delivering an argument to a ficus plant." Cady gave her a meaningful look. "My house is across the street and two over from you, seriously, come by anytime okay?" She got up and shook Adina's hand again. "Have a good night, _Mathias_."

"Bye Cady," he said pointedly.

Adina grinned, "So how long have you two been friends?"

He laughed, "I don't know about friends, her dad's the sheriff," he said like that explained everything. Adina made a blank face and he shrugged, "She's okay, she's a lawyer when she's not tending bar, she does a lot of work on the rez."

"Ah," she took a final sip of her water as he tossed some bills on the table. "Total crush on her, she seems awesome."

He held out his hand to her and she got up from the table, letting him lace her fingers again. "You gonna make me compete with the sheriff's daughter for your affections, Miss Adina?"

She laughed, and tossed her head, "Not as long as you keep making me come so hard I forget English."

"Fair enough," he handed her the car keys. "Feel like going back to your place and forgetting English some more?"

She giggled as he held the door open for her, she passed so close to him his lips brushed the back of her neck. Or maybe he did that on purpose. She glanced over her shoulder and met his eyes, suddenly coy. "Just English?"


	6. Chapter 6

Adina climbed into the driver's side of the Jeep and reached down to readjust the seat. "You're going to have to tell me where I'm going," she warned, moving around the rearview mirror as well.

"Mm hm," he was fiddling with the passenger side seat heater dials. "Left out of the parking lot and then get on the main road." He said, not looking up.

"Okay," she did as he said, letting her hand trail from the gear shift to his inner thigh as soon as she was out of the parking lot. She slid her nails back and forth just above the seam of his jeans absently as she drove. He let her, the touch was tantalizing, an almost-touch because of the heavy denim.

"Were you really only thinking of staying in Durant for a year?" the question shocked both of them a little, maybe. Adina's eyes flicked back to him from the road. He was pointedly looking out at the passing scenery.

"I don't know," she said finally. "Trish offered me the place for as long as I wanted, I thought a year was a decent amount of time to start."

"Mm," her fingers had slowed to a stop, but they were high on his thigh. An inch or two further and they'd be other places. "Does it really bother you that much how early everything closes?"

"Not especially," her eyes flicked back to him again and she smiled quickly before returning her attention to the road, "If there's nothing to do, I make my own fun, you know?"

He chuckled, reaching for the crochet hook that held her hair up and working it gently free. Adina kept her eyes on the road but she was pleasantly surprised that he managed it without the hook grabbing her hair and pulling painfully. When her hair fell in a heavy coil down the back of her neck he reached for it, spreading it out and over her shoulder. Adina realized she was barely breathing. Something about his fingers in her hair filled her with a sense of heady anticipation.

She swallowed, then swallowed again because her throat was suddenly dry. Her eyes flicked to him again, he was intent on her hair, his body was leaning against the car door, but his elbow rested on the seat rest, his fingers brushing through the heavy curls gently, almost absently. "Have you always lived here?" She managed to say.

"Mm-hm," his fingers trailed down her arm, caressing the back of it. She couldn't resist the shiver that tore through her. "Turn right here," he said softly, nodding his chin at an exit sign. Adina signaled even though there was no one else on the road.

"What about college?" She asked, "I thought you said…"

"I went to the tribal community college in Lame Deer and stayed with some people. After that I transferred to a distance program with University of Wisconsin."

"So… your whole life." She shook her head, "Wow."

"I belong here," he said simply, sitting up in the seat.

"Must be nice," she said, she recognized where they were now, she turned down the street that would take them back to the house without prompting.

"You've never felt like you belonged somewhere," he sounded a little shocked. She flicked her eyes to him and back to the road, they were almost back. She parked on the street just behind his car. Her Jeep was too wide to make the drive up the narrow driveway. It was a part of the house that hadn't been updated since it was originally built in the forties. "What about when your parents were alive?"

She flinched infinitesimally, but he saw it. She turned off the ignition and the dome light automatically came on. She turned to look at him, Adina could tell by the look on his face that he caught the tiny flinch. He didn't say anything, but he saw it. She sighed, "My parents were...very different than me."

"How so?" He undid his seat belt.

"They were really, really conservative. Super religious. We just weren't very alike." She undid her seatbelt and collapsed back against her seat, "Even when I was a kid, they just didn't make very much sense to me. They died my sophomore year in college, after that there was no reason for me to go back to that town, you know? So I didn't."

"No other family?" He sounded like he couldn't wrap his head around it.

"I mean yeah, but they're all like my parents." She laughed, "They were Orthodox, right? I mean like really, really Jewish. Like, no lights on Saturday Jewish." She shook her head, "When the RA told me they died...my first thought was 'holy shit I want a ham and cheese sandwich'." His brow furrowed and she laughed, "Not kosher. Ma would have lost her shit."

"Ah," he ran his fingers through her hair, "I'm sorry."

She shrugged, "Me too. But it is what it is, I try to be a good person. If there is a God, I think that's enough." She took a deep breath, she hadn't talked about this in a long, long time. "Listen, can we go inside?" Adina raised her shoulder, rubbing her cheek against the fall of hair he'd spread over it. "I'm cold."

He smiled and it was kind, she searched his face for anything that looked like pity. She told herself if she saw pity she'd tell him to fuck off and get on a plane for New Orleans tomorrow. But it wasn't there. "You're going to need to invest in some leggings or something," he said, opening the passenger side door.

Adina shook her head and laughed as he made his way around the car, opening her door for her, helping her out. When she was on the street she stared up at him, the light from the streetlamp throwing his face in shadow. She reached up, tracing the line of his jaw with her finger. "Will you stay with me?" She asked, her body swaying slowly toward him. "Tonight, I mean."

He nodded slowly, his eyes burned in the shadows. The sight of the wide, surprised grin that lit her face made him feel something he'd never felt before. Some feeling he wasn't interested in naming yet.

"Good," she stepped back, away from the Jeep and toward the sidewalk. "I'll make breakfast tomorrow."

Mathias walked behind her, his boots scraping the pavement. "Well now I'm looking forward to tomorrow."

Adina threw a grin over her shoulder, "Just tomorrow?" She tramped up the steps to the porch and jingled the keys until she found the house key.

"Tonight's still pretty high on my list too," he teased, holding the storm door open for her so she could unlock the deadbolt. She was laughing as she walked inside, flipping on lights as she went. She tossed her purse on the couch when his phone beeped. Mathias said a word in a language she didn't understand and she suspected it was foul. She laughed silently and gestured toward the bedroom mouthing "bathroom" at him. He nodded, pulling the phone from his back pocket.

Adina walked quickly to the bathroom, relieved herself and washed her hands, hoping whoever was calling him at this time on a Thursday night wasn't going to need him to go see them. She stared at herself in the bathroom mirror as she wiped her hands on the hand towel. Talking about her parents made her feel...she wasn't sure what. Not sad, exactly. She walked back into the bedroom, flicked on the bedside light and kicked her shoes off, nudging them and the little half socks she wore to protect her feet from ballet-flat-stank under the bed with her toe. She slid the jacket off her shoulders and dropped it on the bench at the foot of the bed.

When she made it back into the living room he was standing in the middle of the room, staring down at his cell phone. "Everything okay?" She said softly. He turned back to her and the smile that lit his face made her stomach flip.

"Yeah," he lifted his phone before tossing it on the coffee table where it thudded. "My sister."

She smiled shyly, stepping away from the bedroom doors. The bare boards of the floor were cold under her feet. "I didn't know you had a sister."

He stepped to her, his hands settling at her waist, his body so close if she breathed deeply she'd be touching him. "She texts me when she gets home from work, so I know she's safe."

"You're a good brother," Adina said, her hands smoothing his tee shirt, then sliding up to lift his hair back from his shoulders.

"She wouldn't say that," he laughed.

"Yeah, well," Adina shrugged, "perspective."

"Yeah," his hands were curved around her ribs, his thumbs brushing the undersides of her breasts.

"I never thanked you for dinner," she murmured, her lips were close to his, almost brushing them. Her eyes flicked up to meet his briefly, then went back to his lips. "Thank you," the kiss was so soft it wasn't a kiss, just a brushing of lips. She swayed on her toes, her fingers curling around his biceps. She felt the muscles jump and her fingers tightened reflexively. Her calf muscles were starting to burn. "I like the way you taste," she teased.

His hands slid from her ribs, lightning fast, plunging into her hair. His kiss was scorching, his fingers were tight on her skin, angling her jaw. Adina moaned into his mouth. Her fingers dug into his arms and his teeth scraped her bottom lip. She was pulling him closer to her, his body was warm against her, she could feel the hard ridge of his belt buckle through the dress, the tense line of his erection through the jeans. She pressed herself harder against his chest and his mouth left hers, he held her still, but away from his lips. Adina heard a ragged noise and realized it was her own breathing. She looked into his eyes, the intensity in them was almost frightening.

His hands fell away from her and she slowly eased herself down from her toes. Her fingers were still curled around his arms, he towered over her, his eyes burned. Adina held his gaze and her fingers slid down his arms, finding his hands. He let her wrap her hands in his, he held perfectly still, the rise and fall of his chest the only movement. Adina stepped back again, then another step. She kept her grip on his hands and she felt a sort of vague triumph that he followed her, but then immediately wondered why. Of course he'd follow. That look in his eyes was consuming. The kiss had been claiming. They made slow progress, but when they got to the doors to the bedroom she dropped one of his hands, reaching behind herself blindly to find the edge of the door. To shove it open so that the bedroom was open completely.

Mathias's eyes never left hers. She knew if he were anyone else she'd feel like prey under those eyes, hunted, on display. With him she felt...warm. Womanly. She didn't break his gaze, but she turned her body away from him, her right hand held his, as she turned her fingers fell gently away from his. She felt the hard ridge of the heavy band he wore on his finger and her fingers curled around it, squeezing the ring tightly as she walked into the bedroom proper.

Warmth filled her belly. The way he looked at her turned her on. She'd never been aroused just by the way someone looked at her before. She stopped next to the side of the bed. The light on the table was the only light in the room. It light her body from behind so she was in silhouette. She stopped her slow walk next to the bed. Finally dropping his hand completely. Mathias raised an eyebrow and she felt her lips curving into a small, mysterious smile. her fingers reached up to the buttons of the dress and she watched him as she began slowly unbuttoning them.

Usually she just pulled the dress over her head, but the buttons went all the way down. Unbuttoning them for him, slow, one at a time felt like she was unwrapping a present. Although, she wondered distantly if the gift was for herself or for him in the end. When she'd unbuttoned the dress nearly to her waist she stopped, her fingers sliding up the two halves of the fabric. She curled her fingers around the straps of the dress at her shoulders and slid them over her shoulders, letting the dress fall open and down her body. It caught briefly on her arms and then fell away completely.

She stood before him in nothing but the strapless bra, it was a rose color that matched the dress almost exactly, and the new underwear she put on before they left the house earlier. Her hair fell around her shoulders, framing her. She didn't speak, her eyes not leaving his. She reached behind her with both hands, slowly unhooking the bra, then letting it fall as well.

His eyes flashed when the bra fell and her teeth tugged at her bottom lip. She lifted her hands to cup her breasts, her fingers closing over her hardening nipples. She offered them to him.

Mathias made a sound, a quick exhalation of breath before he closed his eyes, his hands going to pull his shirt over his head. It was a quick movement and he tossed the shirt, not looking to see where it landed. If she hadn't been holding her breasts she would have reached up to touch his hair as it fell around his shoulders. He reached for her, his fingers stopping just short of her breasts, then brushing her fingers. She let her hands fall away and his breath exhaled. He caressed the curves of her breasts and she inhaled, sharp.

His hands curved under her breasts, lifting them, his thumbs brushing her nipples. Adina felt her head fall back. One of his hands slid up, up her chest, cradling her head, his thumb curling over the column of her neck. Mathias trailed his other hand from her breast, it slid down her belly to the flare of her hips. He eased her closer to him, his lips hovering over hers. Adina's eyes were half closed but she watched him. His brow furrowed once, then relaxed, he flicked his gaze to hers and then back to her lips. His lips curved into a small, pleased smile. He place a small, tender kiss at the corner of her mouth and she sighed.

He kissed her again, his lips place more small, tender kisses on her lips. He sipped at her mouth, taking his fill. She opened her mouth to him and her hands touched his bare chest, tentative, unsure. His skin was so warm beneath her fingers. As though he had a fire burning inside him. She let her fingers slide down his chest and belly in long, smooth strokes. He groaned into her mouth.

Her fingers closed over his belt at the same moment that his fingers hooked in the waist of the lacy panties. He released her and took a small step back. Adina lifted her head, a question on her lips. He quirked an eyebrow, his fingers working the belt open, then going to the button of his jeans. The silent challenge made her own fingers go to the lace and she eased it over her hips. It slid down her legs to puddle at her feet with the dress and the forgotten bra. She stood bare before him as his hands stilled on the jeans. He lifted one foot, using the toe of his other boot to ease his foot from the boot. Then again. He kicked the boots under the bed, heels stepping on the toes of his socks so he could slide out of them.

Adina's eyes didn't leave his body. Her fingers itched to touch him, she bit her lip to stop herself from bending to his nipples. His hands went back to the jeans and her throat was dry. Her eyes flicked back to his, the intensity was still there, but now there was a tinge of amusement. He was enjoying the effect he was having on her.

When he finally unzipped the jeans and slid them and his shorts down his legs, Adina felt a little light headed. He stood before her, hands at his sides, breathing deeply. She took him in, she reached out, her fingers brushing his pebbled nipples and then grazing down, over his hard belly and lower. He bent to her touch, as her fingers slipped lower he swayed toward her. Her fingers caressed him, sliding gently against the underside of his erect penis and his head fell back. He straightened almost immediately but she smiled, appreciating her small victory.

"Mathias," she said softly, his eyes flared and he lifted his head, meeting her gaze. She lifted her hands to cup his face. She arched up, her upper body brushing his. Her nipples were hardening almost painfully. His hands were clenched at his sides. "Touch me, Mathias," she whispered, her lips inches from his.

He groaned and suddenly she was on her back on the bed. He rose above her and she whimpered, her fingers reaching for him. He bent over her, his lips finding her breasts, first one, then the other. His hair fell around him and she realized it was the first time she'd done this with someone who had hair as long as hers. The feel of his hair against her skin was almost as erotic as the feel of his lips. She sighed on the bed, her fingers grasping his body, urging him.

Mathias's lips were leaving long, open mouthed kisses in a trail down her belly. Adina's legs fell open for him and he grinned against her skin. She was shaved completely bare and his fingers closed over her mound briefly. Adina gasped and he chuckled against her inner thigh. He was placing small, soft kisses on her thighs, working his way up to the apex and she arched on the bed. Her fingers found his head and she threaded them through his hair, not directing him, just holding him against her.

When his mouth closed over her sex she _did_ cry out. His lips were sure and she knew he could make her climax just like this. Adina shook her head on the bed, her fingers flexing convulsively in his hair. He raised his head to meet her gaze and whatever he saw there had him lifting from her. He kissed her inner thigh once more and rose, bending to his jeans for a moment.

She could hear him rustling there and she wanted to tell him she had something in the bedside table, but she couldn't find the words. She wriggled on the bed so that her head was on the pillow and so she could touch him while he was fiddling for condoms. Her fingers slid down his back and he tossed a glance over his shoulder at her. She was on her side, one hand curved on the pillow, her fingers inches from her lips, the other reaching for him. It was the kind of candid pose that begged to be photographed.

His fingers found what he was looking for and he ripped the package open with his teeth. Adina lifted onto her elbow as he rolled the condom onto himself and climbed onto the bed. She lay back against the pillows as he rose over her. Her hands curved over his chest to his neck, then his jaw. She urged his lips to hers and the kiss he gave her made her glad she was lying down. His fingers found her sex and dipped, testing her. She moaned against his lips and her fingers grabbed his ass, urging him.

Mathias let her close her fingers over him, guiding him inside her. When he thrust inside her for the first time she gasped, tossing her head on the pillow. He kissed her neck, then her jaw, his lips blazing a path back to hers. She cried out when he began thrusting in earnest, his nose nudged hers, she thrashed beneath him. "Adina," he spoke and his voice was hoarse against her ear. She whimpered beneath him. "Open your eyes," he commanded softly.

She thrashed again, he was finding his rhythm. Working his body against hers. He swiveled his hips and the sensation caused her eyes to fly open. He chuckled at the look he saw in them but rose above her so he could meet her gaze more fully. Adina lay on the bed and watched his face as he fucked her. His expression was fierce, but oddly gentle. She got the feeling he'd only hurt her if she asked him to. She slid her fingers over his arms and wrapped her arms around his neck, holding him against her. "Fuck me, Mathias," she said quietly, "I want to feel you come."

"Yeah?" He quickened his pace, one of his hands going between their two bodies to find her clit. She moaned as his thumb circled it, his pace unwavering. "Like this?"

"Mm," she thrashed beneath him, "Just like that." She curled a leg around his waist, holding his body more tightly against hers. His pace was quickening. She found being with someone so close to her own height was different, more intimate. It was impossible not to look him in the eye. She tightened her legs around him and he kissed her, his teeth scraping her lips. She groaned against him. He bit her lower lip and she cried out, "Fuck, don't stop," his thumb was frigging her and he'd found a rhythm that was somewhere between heaven and maddening. His teeth closed over her collar bones and she cried out again, little cries. Her fingers dug into his ass, "Don't you dare stop," she commanded, but her voice was breathy, a hoarse whisper.

He laughed against her skin and gave up pretense, getting down to the serious business of fucking her. His lips closed over hers and he kissed her hard, as though he'd eat her from the mouth down. Adina moaned against his lips. His rhythm was going erratic. She knew he was close, she clenched her muscles around him and he made a noise like a growl against her lips. She did it again. He lost it, his body thrusting hard into her once, twice, again, He came hard with a shout against her bare shoulder. Adina's arms snaked around him as he shuddered above her.

His lips left hers and he bit the flesh above her breast. His fingers didn't stop against her clitoris, he rocked his hips gently against hers and she closed her eyes, her orgasm wasn't nearly as intense as his, it was a quiet rain, pattering around her. She gasped against his neck, arching into him as the waves ebbed. His name was a mantra on her lips. She came back to herself, her arms still around him. "Thank you," she whispered against his neck and he made a move to pull away. Adina made a negating sound in her throat, "Stay," she murmured.

"I'm just going to find a trash can," he said, his lips grazing hers. He pulled away from her and she felt bereft. He lifted her fingers to his lips and kissed them, walking away purposefully. She heard him moving around in the bathroom and she rolled onto her side. Sated. She knew she should be getting under the covers or something but she felt too marvelous to move. He left the bathroom and she lifted her head. "I'll be right back," he murmured, she heard him flipping off lights in the living room, she heard the door being locked. Adina smiled against the pillow, he was going to stay the night. He wouldn't leave stark naked.

When he came back to the bed she heard him place something on the bedside table, she suspected it was his cell phone, he slid the covers back and lifted her, edging her beneath the blankets. Adina turned over so that she could stare up at him from the nest of blankets. She lifted a hand to him and he smiled, reaching out to move her hair from her face.

"So beautiful," he murmured and she blushed, deep and red. He grinned, his other hand reaching to flick off the bedside moved further into the blankets, rolling over as she felt the mattress give beneath him in the dark. His hand snaked over her belly and she felt him settle against her back, the length of his body fully against hers. She snuggled into his chest and he laughed, "Cold?" He said, his lips against the curve of her ear.

Adina sighed, "I want to be touching as much of you as possible," she said in the darkness and she felt his lips moving in her hair.

"I could get used to this," he warned against her neck.

"Me too," she sighed, closing her eyes. She laced her fingers through his, pulling his hand between her breasts. "Pancakes tomorrow?" she said, feeling sleep closing in. He made a sound that could have been affirmation, but then his fingers left hers and cupped her breast and she slid into sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

Mathias woke as soon as she shifted away from him. He kept still, letting her think she was easing herself away from his body without waking him. He felt her leave the bed and listened as she padded to the bathroom. He'd never been the kind of person to awaken slowly, when he woke he woke. He turned over on the bed, if she wanted to believe she was letting him rest he wouldn't disappoint.

He'd woken her twice in the night, the more he explored the plains and contours of her body the more he wanted to. They'd broken into her condom stash in the nightstand. He was collecting her cries, the different noises she made when he loved her body. He was determined to know every inch of her, though he wasn't entirely sure why. He heard the click of the bathroom door and made sure to keep his breathing even.

Her touch was gentle, her knuckles grazing his jaw in a just-barely touch. Her lips brushed his ear, "Faker," she whispered and he smiled against the pillow, turning over on his back to look at her. Adina sat on the edge of the mattress. She'd donned a jersey knit robe but nothing else.

"Good morning," he murmured, his fingers trailing to the v made by the two halves of the robe.

"Hey," she said, her hair was a cloud around her shoulders, the sun was shining through the windows and the light made her hair appear so dark a red it was bloody. "I'm going to make breakfast, do you have to work?"

"Mm," he made a face, "I'll go in at one or so," the start of the weekend was always busy on the rez. Especially at night.

Her smile lit her whole face, "Good, I was worried we'd overslept."

He furrowed his brow, "What time is it?" his fingers found his phone and he pressed a button. The screen read seven thirty. He sat the phone back on the bedside table and fell back against the pillows, "What time did you need to be awake?"

She shrugged, "I work from home, I make my own hours. I was more worried about you."

"Ah," he reached for her and she let him pull her to him. She settled against his chest and slung a leg over his. His fingers brushed her hair away from her neck and she tilted her chin, her lips finding his neck. "Thank you for the concern," he said, his fingers tracing lines along the arch of her neck.

"You're welcome," she was caressing his chest in short circles. "Last night was pretty fantastic," she said, she sighed when he started to scratch her back lightly.

"I agree," he brushed his lips against her hair. He watched as she turned her head into his chest, hiding her face briefly. It was cute. He grinned, "You're blushing."

"I am not," She said, muffled against his skin. He laughed.

"Liar," his fingers tickled her neck and she tossed her head, her hair flying as she turned her face to his shoulder.

"I am not," she said again, nudging her face tighter into his shoulder so that he couldn't see it.

He laughed again, shifting beneath her so that he was on his side and she was no longer on top of him. She made a little noise in the back of her throat, her fingers tangling in his hair. He was laughing as he moved so that she was beneath him. She twisted her head, her own giggles muffled by the bed clothes. His fingers found the sensitive flesh on her side, when he started tickling her she shrieked, jerking against him.

"No fair!" She wailed, wriggling like a fish.

"You didn't tell me you were ticklish," he said, amusement tinging his voice. Both of his hands were finding any exposed place on her body. Behind her knee, her neck, her side. She yipped, twisting to get away from him but not nearly quickly enough.

"Mathias," she gasped, she was trying to get a hold of his hands to pull them away from herself and not having much success. She managed to lace her fingers with one of his hands and he let her, but he didn't stop with the other. She sobbed air, he was focusing his attention on her side. She was straining away from him, twisting her body away as much as she was able. She jerked and her head went dangerously close to the corner of the bedside table.

His hand left her side immediately, curling around the back of her head. His lips touched her forehead, "Careful," he said, still laughing but more serious now. He nudged her nose with his, "Don't hurt yourself."

Adina was panting against the pillows. "You're an ass," she said, she was working to catch her breath, but her eyes were laughing.

"You like my ass," he pointed out, his lips finding hers. She tasted like toothpaste. She sighed against his lips, one of her hands went to the hem of the robe, working it back down over her hips.

"You do have a great ass," she said when the kiss ended, she lifted her head, pushing his shoulder gently so that she could move out from under him. She grinned, "It's almost as great as mine."

He laughed as she got off the bed, he reached for her ass and she twisted away from him, giggling. Mathias shifted, moving some pillows around so he was more comfortable. Adina's face softened and she sat back down on the edge of the mattress. She reached for his hand, lifting it to her lips and brushing her lips over the knuckles.

"I'm glad you stayed," she said seriously against his skin.

"Me too," he dipped his head to catch her eye. Adina smiled against his hand and he lifted his index finger to touch her cheek. "I was promised pancakes," he said, smirking.

She tossed her head, "You were," she nipped his knuckle playfully and rose from the bed. "I'll be in the kitchen, help yourself to the shower, there's extra towels in the cupboard in there." She let his hand fall and readjusted her robe. "Coffee'll be in the pot when you're ready."

Adina walked out of the bedroom without looking back. He chuckled and pulled the blankets back. She was something else, this woman. He got out of the bed and stretched, a shower sounded like a great idea.

888

Adina was mixing pancake batter when her phone rang. She glanced at the screen and grinned, Trish didn't waste any time. She tapped the screen again and then tapped the speaker button. "Morning, sunshine," she said, placing the phone on the window sill above the sink.

 _"Hey, how was the date?_ "

"It's still good," Adina said, cracking an egg into the bowl.

" _He's still there?_ " Trish laughed, " _Girl, you slut._ "

"Yeah, yeah," Adina poured milk into the bowl. The coffee pot gurbled. "He's in the shower," she could hear the water moving through the pipes still, one of the quirks of an old house.

" _So_ …"

"So what," she started mixing the batter, the cast iron skillet was heating on the stove. The trick was to get the skillet good and hot before adding batter.

" _So...how was it_?" Trish popped her gum, " _I'm guessing pretty good, since you're making me ask_."

Adina giggled as she mixed the contents of the bowl and Trish's laughter from the phone's place on the window echoed in the kitchen.

" _That good, huh_?" She sipped something noisily. " _I'm glad_."

"Thanks," Adina said, the batter was mixed. She took a sip of her orange juice and moved to the stove top, dripping it onto the greased skillet. The sound of water had stopped, she suspected he'd be joining her in the kitchen soon. "I'm making pancakes, he'll probably be out soon."

" _You're making pancakes_." Trish popped her gum again. " _You never make **me** pancakes_."

"You've never given me six orgasms in four hours," she countered, using the spatula to flip the first pancake.

Trisha laughed, " _Well you never asked!"_

"It doesn't count if she's got to ask," Mathias said from behind Adina. He brushed his lips over her shoulder as he took an empty mug from the dish drain, reaching for the coffee pot.

"Trish, this is Mathias," Adina said, moving the first pancake from the skillet and pouring more batter. "Mathias, meet Trisha," Adina jerked her chin at the phone, "you know, so to speak."

" _Well hey, Mathias_ ," Trish's voice cooed and Adina rolled her eyes. " _So...six in four hours, huh? You must be all **kinds** of talented_."

Mathias's eyes were laughing as he sipped his coffee. He leaned his hip against the sink and watched Adina while she expertly poured, flipped, and then again. "That's what they tell me," he said finally. His hair was damp, Adina noted, clumping together in hanks down his back. His bare chest had some rogue water drops and he'd put on his shorts, but nothing else.

" _That's fantastic,_ " Trisha laughed again, " _so of course you know, you hurt my friend I'll skin you for my new saddle, right?_ "

"Trisha," Adina's voice held a warning note, but, he noted, she also sounded fairly resigned.

" _Oh what, he's not offended, are you Mathias,_ " Trish popped her gum again.

"Not at all," he sipped his coffee. Adina flicked her gaze to his and he arched an eyebrow. She rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to the skillet.

" _See? We're just making friends_ ," Trish said, laughing. " _For real, though. I'll turn you into a saddle._ "

"Noted," he put the coffee mug on the counter and touched Adina's shoulder, "what can I do?" he said softly.

She jerked her chin at the fridge. "There's syrup in there," she murmured quietly, "Sausage too, if you want to grab it."

" _Are you doing the domestic thing_?" Trish teased.

"Yes we are, can you please enjoy this a little less?" Adina's voice held a hint of annoyance. Mathias smirked into the open refrigerator as he reached for the sausage.

Trisha giggled, sounding slightly delighted she'd scored a hit. When she spoke again she was more serious, " _Listen I called to warn you. I told Jane where you were and she's going to be sending you an email_."

"Why?" Adina poured the last of the batter onto the skillet.

" _She wants some pages from you._ " Trish slurped her coffee and Adina sighed, tossing the spatula on the stove. She downed the rest of her orange juice.

"It's been like ten minutes."

" _I know, but you know how she is, I thought you'd like to know_."

"Yeah, thanks," Adina slipped around Mathias and pulled the carton of orange juice from the refrigerator. He furrowed his brow at her but opened the package of sausage, dropping them into the empty skillet. Adina sighed, murmured her thanks and poured more juice into her glass. "She's going to drive me crazy."

" _If it makes you feel any better, she's doing it to everyone else too_ ," Trish groaned, " _I've got two other writers threatening to find new representation_."

"Seriously?" Adina stretched her neck, "Is she doing okay?"

" _I think she's getting a divorce,_ " Trish sighed, " _I mean I know she's a pain in the ass, but-_ "

"Yeah, I got you," Adina sipped her juice and watched Mathias poke sausages with the spatula. They _were_ doing the domestic thing, she realized. She felt a blush coming on. "She's good at what she does."

"Exactly. So, you know…"

"I'll let her micromanage if it'll make her feel better." Adina said, Jane really was a fantastic agent. Her style was demanding, but it was a big part of the reason Adina's writing had improved so quickly. Jane had been her representation since her first book. She was willing to give her a lot of latitude. "Thanks for the warning."

" _Welcome_ ," Trish popped her gum, " _So Mathias, are you really as sexy as Adina said you were_?"

"Trisha!" Adina put her juice glass down.

He threw back his head and laughed, tossing a glance at Adina. Her cheeks were flaming. "I don't know," he said, sounding very pleased with himself, "How sexy did she say I was?"

" _Well I mean I'd repeat it but I'm pretty sure she'd shrivel up and blow away_ ," Trish said, her own laughter ringing through the phone.

"Trisha, why do you hate me?" Adina stepped behind him, her hands snaking around his waist, she buried her face in his hair.

" _I wouldn't do it if you didn't make it so easy, Dee,_ " Trish laughed again. " _Listen I gotta go, I've got a meeting_."

"Talk later," Adina rested her cheek against his shoulder blade, her fingers were tracing patterns on his stomach as he cooked the sausage.

" _Mm-hmm. Hey Mathias_?"

"Yep?" His voice held laughter. Adina was silently pleased he hadn't pulled a face and left. Trish could be polarizing.

" _Seriously. Saddle_."

"I heard you the first time," he said, lifting a few of the sausage links onto the waiting plate.

" _Just so we understand each other_." Trish's voice softened, " _Take care of my girl, okay_?"

"Trisha," Adina sighed, reaching for the phone.

" _What? I'm protective, sue me._ " Trish made a sound that Adina was pretty sure meant she'd blown a raspberry. " _Bye_!" And the phone beeped to show the call ended.

She rested her head against his shoulder and made a frustrated sound.

"She seems nice," he said, not bothering to hide the amusement.

"She means well," Adina kissed his shoulder and stepped back, letting her arms fall away from him so she could reach for plates from the cabinet. "She's just protective, we've known each other since we were kids."

He cast a glance at her, "She Jewish too?"

"No," She shrugged, "we met at school when we were in kindergarten. My parents loved her. After a few years she'd sleepover on the weekends and she became our helper goy."

At his look of confusion Adina grinned, "So Shabbos starts at sundown on Friday night, right? When that happens you can't do anything with electricity. Like at all. So if cookings not done or you haven't turned on the bathroom light, then you're peeing in the dark. No candles even. That's work and you can't work on Shabbat. So some folks have friends who aren't Jewish that will come over for Shabbat dinner, and those friends can, like, flip on the lights or whatever. Cause they're not Ortho so they're allowed. Helper goy."

"Ah," his tone said he didn't get it at all, but he believed her.

"Goy isn't the nicest word, it's actually kindof a slur for a non-Jew in yiddish." Adina used a fork to put some pancakes on each plate. He got the feeling there was more there than she was telling him. "But Trish is good people."

He smiled, switching off the stove. "She the only person from your childhood you still talk to?"

"Yep," Adina shrugged, using a knife to cut some butter for the pancakes. "She's honestly more like my sister than a friend."

"I can tell." He sat the plate of sausage on the counter between the two plates of pancakes. "She did threaten to turn me into a saddle."

Adina laughed, "Trish believes you have to be specific with your threats. Someone's more likely to take you seriously if you tell them exactly what you're going to do."

He furrowed his brow, quirking his head as though he was thinking about it. "Makes sense, actually." He poured syrup over the stack of pancakes on his plate. "So you're telling me she won't actually follow through?"

"Well to be clear, she was only going to skin you if you hurt me," Adina said, teasing. "But you're probably fine, I don't think she actually knows how to do that."

"Oh yeah?" He laughed, taking a bite of the pancakes.

"Yeah," she winked, "Trish isn't the one of us who's dad was a butcher."


	8. Chapter 8

"Do you want to order pizza for lunch today?" Cady's voice cut through Adina's revery and she glanced up from her computer screen. Cady grinned, "I'm craving carbs." Ever since Adina had taken her up on her offer of company she'd been going over to Cady's house a few times a week to work. They'd both work on their respective projects, but the presence of another person made the solitariness of working-from-home slightly more palatable.

"Sure, why not," Adina clicked over from her word document to email. Jane had replied to her most recent pages with comments. She was avoiding reading the response. Jane had been especially terse over the past few weeks and even though Trish swore it was entirely her personal problems, Adina was starting to feel it was her work instead. "I could definitely do carbs today."

Cade picked up her cell phone but shot Adina a look, "Everything okay?"

She shrugged, "My agent is being...herself," She laughed, "curse of the creative, your work is entirely subjective."

"What, you think it's great, and she doesn't agree?" Cady typed a few numbers on her phone. "What do you want on the pizza?"

"Nothing healthy," Adina said, deciding to just dive in and read the damn comments. It couldn't be that bad, right?

 _Adina-_

 _Thank you for the attached, please note I have not commented on the pages proper as I'm unable to provide helpful feedback. What's happened? Your recent submissions have been seriously lacking in all of the things that typically make your writing great. Please revise and resend._

 _On an unrelated note, Trisha tells me you've met someone. Congratulations! This is your first serious relationship since publication, isn't it? I know you'll find a way to juggle romance with your writing like a champ._

 _Looking forward to next week's update!_

 _Yours,_

 _Jane_

Adina muttered a curse in yiddish she had never actually used before. What the actual fuck. Cady glanced at her while she completed her order with the pizza delivery service. Adina rolled her eyes and slammed her laptop shut. Fuck Jane. She reached for her phone, firing off a text to Trish. _Is Jane being a monster to everyone? Because what did she actually say to you about my pages?_

Cady hung up the phone and gave her a look that was sympathetic, but also a little confused. "Everything okay?"

"No," Adina opened her laptop again and waiting for it to boot back up. "Read this email and tell me if I'm being over sensitive."

She turned the computer screen around and handed it to her friend. Cady's eyes scanned quickly and widened. "Wow. That seems really...inappropriate."

"Yeah," her phone pinged, Trish had responded. _Not especially, what'd she say?_ Adina took her laptop back and forwarded the message. _Check your email_ she tapped. "I don't even know how to respond to that without screaming at her."

"That's your agent, right? Is she always like that?" Cady finished the last of her coffee and got up, "I'm refilling, do you want?"

Adina checked her cup, it was empty actually. She handed it to her gratefully. "No, she's not. Trisha says she's going through some things personally, but she's never sniped at me like this." Her phone pinged again. _Jesus, Jane, what the hell_. Adina sighed, at least it wasn't just her. _I mean what you sent her wasn't great, but it didn't deserve_ _ **that**_.

She made a face, _Thanks Trish, you're so supportive._

"What does Trish say?" Cady handed her a fresh cup of coffee with cream.

"Thanks," she rolled her eyes as she took a sip, "Apparently what I sent her was crap but not THAT crap."

"I doubt it was crap." Cady said loyally, sitting back down at her end of the table. She shifted some files around and lifted a law book.

"Well honestly it _is_ a rough draft, so it sort of is crap. I mean nature of the first draft, right?" Adina sighed, "I don't know, I've been having a harder time with getting this book started than the other ones I've written. I can't figure out why it's not working." Her phone pinged again _Hey, I'm not the one that said your writing was crap because you're getting laid!_

"What do you think it is?" Cady made some notes on a legal pad.

"I honestly don't know." Adina threw herself back in the chair and shrugged, "Maybe it _is_ Mathias, what do I know."

Cady put her pen down. "You don't actually think that."

"No, of course not," Adina shoved her hands into her hair and twisted it into a bun on top of her head. She pushed the end through the hole in the bun and it stayed on it's own. One of the plus sides to ridiculously thick, curly hair, she mused. "I mean, he's great." She rolled her eyes, "Better than great, actually. It's just...I don't know. Jane's right, I really haven't had a relationship since I first got published so maybe it IS affecting my writing, I don't know." She tapped a response to Trish quickly, _yeah but you're sure not defending me either._

"Well it probably is, but I have a hard time believing it's in a way that's negative," Cady took a sip of coffee. "What's been going on there? You haven't been coming around the Red Pony."

Adina shrugged, "Mostly we're spending time at my place, either he brings takeout or I cook. It's all very boring and domestic and I hate that I love it." She laughed in self deprecation. "I keep waiting for something to go wrong or for him to decide to be an asshole."

Cady arched an eyebrow, "That doesn't sound like something he'd do based on so far," she pointed out.

"Oh I know, it just seems a little too perfect at the moment." She shrugged as the doorbell rang. "I mean it's hard for something to go wrong when it's just the two of us."

"Hold that thought," Cady went to the door to pay for pizza.

Adina checked her phone, Trish had responded. _Look, you know I've got your back, but Jane's right, your pages aren't as good as they usually are. Maybe it's the setting. You've never done an historical before._ She sighed, it was a valid point. She was just a little disappointed with herself because that was a time period she really wanted to explore. She typed a quick response _Okay, duly noted. I'll do some assessing today and see what I can shift around._

Cady placed the steaming pizza box in the center of the table. Adina got up to go to the kitchen and find some plates. "Can you grab some sodas while you're in there?" Cady called and Adina reached in the fridge, pulling a few cans out as she went. She resolved to not eat an entire half of the pizza just because she'd gotten some shitty feedback regarding her work. She grabbed a stack of napkins too. By now she'd been inside Cady's house enough that she felt comfortable helping herself.

When she walked back to the dining table, Cady was already working to remove coffee cups and clear a space in the center of the table so they could eat away-ish from their work. Adina handed her a plate and a can of soda. "So what did you mean earlier about it just being the two of you. You go out, right?" Cady popped her soda top.

"Actually, not so much," Adina helped herself to a slice of pizza. "I mean, his schedule is weird because of his job and I sortof like being a homebody for a change, so, you know, we hang out at my place."

"Huh. Have you been to his place like at all?" Cady took a bite of her pizza and made a sound that was almost orgasmic. "This was exactly what I needed."

"I haven't, actually." Adina took a slice of her own, "I'm not even sure where he lives, to be honest."

"Any idea why?"

Adina shrugged, "I hadn't put much thought into it, I figured he wasn't ready to share." She took a considering bite of her pizza, "Okay I know how that sounds, but it doesn't bother me." She cast around for a napkin and realized she'd left the stack at Cady's elbow. She stuck out her hand and opened and closed her fingers in an exaggerated _gimme gimme_ gesture. Cady handed her half the stack and she wiped her mouth. "Like, I get the whole Otherness thing, right? The way I grew up, I'm just imagining taking a non-Jew home and I can see how that would make waves. I figure it's similar for him with a white chick, no?"

Cady shrugged, "Could be, I mean it's not unheard of for an Indian to date a white person, though. So you may be giving him a free pass there." She made a face, "You're taking it extremely well, though."

"Well I'm not going to scream at him about it," Adina laughed. "He's done nothing to make me feel like I'm a dirty secret, if I call him he answers, he's not parking his car three blocks over, he's taken me out in public, even if that was a few weeks ago."

"Okay," Cady took another bite of her pizza.

"Besides, there's something to be said for it being just the two of us. I sortof like that it's still kindof just ours, you know? I mean based on some things he's said about how tied he is to the rez I'm a little afraid I'd be in a relationship with like five thousand people or something."

"There is no way it's that bad," she took a sip of her soda.

"What do you think, I mean you've known him longer than I have." Adina took another bite of the pizza slice and allowed herself to savor it. Cady was right, this was exactly what she needed. Her phone beeped again but she refused to reach for it. It was lunch time, she wasn't going to think about work for another twenty minutes.

Cady shrugged, tossing her hair off her shoulders. "I don't know, actually. I mean, I haven't really had much dealing with him before I took all this on," she jerked her chin at the piles of file folders.

"What's your opinion of him now?" her phone beeped a second time. She refused to look at it. "I mean based solely on all that," she tossed her head at the stacks of folders.

Cady was quiet for a long moment as she chewed. "I think he's a stand-up guy." She took a sip of her soda. "He cares a lot about the people out there and he wants to do right by them. I think his job is a lot harder than it should be." She made a face but didn't elaborate.

"How come?" Adina prodded. She picked a piece of sausage off her pizza slice and popped it in her mouth.

"Well, okay, before I started taking on these cases I never would have said this and if you repeat it I'll deny it like hell, got it?"

"That sounds ominous," Adina took another slice of pizza from the box even though she hadn't finished the first.

"It does but it isn't. Local law enforcement can be assholes to him. The feds too, but the locals make his job harder."

"Wait, isn't that your dad?" Adina's phone beeped a third time and she reached for it, but only so she could turn it to silent.

"Yeah," Cady laughed shortly. "That's why I said you don't repeat it."

"Ah, sense made." Adina's phone buzzed. So much for silent. "How is your dad ruining his life?"

"I didn't say _that_ ," She shot Adina's phone a pointed look, "You're going to have to look at that eventually."

"I know. I'm taking a lunch break, I can't with Trish and Jane at the moment." She tossed her crust onto her plate. "Back to your dad's not ruining Mathias's life."

Cady laughed, "My dad is a good man, but he's really...focused." She took a bite of her pizza and then a bigger bite when the cheese began to slide off. "He's used to being in charge and he doesn't do the whole cooperation thing well. And the last guy that had Mathias's job was an actual extortionist, so dad discards the Tribal Police more than he should. And the rest of his office takes their cue from him."

Adina blinked, "Rude."

"Yeah," Cady set her slice of pizza back on her plate and burped loudly. "Excuse me," she giggled. "Speaking of rude."

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that," Adina laughed.

"Has he not told you any of that?"

"Nope," Adina took a sip of her drink. "Although I don't know how he could bring any of it up without it sounding like he was just complaining for the sake of it. That's such a shitty situation."

"Yeah."

Adina's phone buzzed again, more insistently this time. It was ringing instead of a text alert. She made a frustrated noise. "Oh jesus, fine!" She picked it up and was surprised to find Mathias himself was calling her. She waved the phone at Cady, "Speak of the devil." She swiped to answer and lifted the phone to her ear, "Hey, what's up?"

" _Where have you been I've been texting for the past twenty minutes!"_

"Has it seriously been that long?" she shot a look at Cady, "How long have we been eating?" Cady shrugged and she made an apologetic sound in her throat, "I thought you were Trish, I was breaking for lunch, I'm sorry. What's wrong?"

" _I'm on my way over, can you be at your place?"_ He sounded off. His tone was even but his voice sounded strained.

Adina furrowed her brow. "Sure, is everything okay? Have you eaten, do you want food?"

He made a frustrated sound in his throat, " _No, I'm fine, can you just be there?"_

"Sure," she looked at Cady and shrugged, gesturing to the phone at her ear. "I'll head over now."

" _Thank you_ ," he actually sounded relieved. Adina wasn't able to reply before he ended the call.

"Everything okay?" Cady sounded as concerned as Adina felt.

"I'm not sure, he sounded off," Adina slid her computer back into it's bag and grabbed the two books she'd brought over. She scrolled through her phone but all his messages were some variation of "where are you". "I hate to eat and run."

"No, seriously, go." She waved a hand, "Text me later to let me know everything's alright."

Adina nodded, feeling a little dazed as she slid her phone into her pocket. She stepped out onto Cady's porch as he was parking his vehicle in front of her house.

"Jesus, he flew here," Cady said.

Adina nodded. They watched as he got out of his SUV, slamming the door shut behind him hard. "Oh this isn't good." Adina said, "I'll call you later."

"Okay," Cady sounded worried herself. "Be safe."

888

Mathias was having a positively _shit_ day. It seemed that everything that could possibly go sideways had. It started when his sister woke him this morning with some story about how her car wasn't working and she needed money. Which, maybe it actually wasn't, because that car was a clunker, but when he'd offered to work on it for her she'd gotten snipey and said something about how clearly he didn't have any spare change now that he had a _girlfriend_. Then he'd made his coffee so strong it was undrinkable because he was distracted, and fuck all who had time to wait for a second pot to brew. So he'd gone into work with a slight caffeine headache.

Only to be greeted with a message from a federal prosecutor letting him know they wouldn't be pursuing a case they'd basically assured him they were going to take a week ago. So he had to contact Maura Two Rivers and let her know well, just kidding about that whole justice thing. Then, the icing on the cake, on his way back from _that_ simply amazing conversation, he'd nearly rear ended Walt Longmire's vehicle. It had taken all he had in him not to take the man's head off. Instead he'd pulled over, tried for polite and gotten the usual bullshit about a county case taking precedence. By the time he'd seen the man off the rez he was seething.

He made it back to the station only to have the officer on desk duty ask "So is it true you got a new girlfriend?" And he'd nearly walked right back out again. He'd made himself calm down, forced his face to reveal nothing when he smiled and made some joke about rumors. "I got it on good authority, Mathias," Kenny had said, slurping his Big Gulp loudly. He'd laughed, said something about 'who's authority' and wanted to punch a merry hole in the wall when Kenny shrugged and said "Your sister."

Dammit. Gina. Mathias shrugged, said something about his sex life not being anyone's business and gone into his office. He'd shut the door, called his sister, and found that apparently, being seen at the Red Pony kissing Adina once two weeks ago merited big gossip amongst Gina's friends. Or, apparently, not the kissing part in itself. He got around. The "kissing her but nobody else" thing. He hadn't been making time with anyone on the rez in weeks. And people were noticing. He resisted the urge to rip the phone from the wall and dump it in the garbage. Gina's voice was deceptively innocent when she asked why it was such a big deal. _Because it was, that's why_.

Why should his life be so interesting? This wasn't the first time gossip had flown about him dating someone. He'd had a few relationships that had caused this kind of minor uproar and usually he just laughed it off. But this time...he shook his head. He added Maura's file to the pile he was collecting for Cady. She stopped by once every two weeks for new cases. Maybe she could do something about this one too. Who fucking knew anymore. He picked up his phone and texted Adina. She'd been pretty good at teasing him out of a bad mood the past few weeks.

It wasn't like this was the first time he'd had a rotten day. He was fully aware today wasn't special. When she didn't answer he tried again, figuring she was in the middle of something. Adina had never actually failed to respond to a text before.

He pulled another file from his inbox, someone was breaking into cars again. He picked up the phone so that he could call over to the casino, due diligence to see if it was just the residents or if the casino was having issues as well. Usually Jacob was good at keeping him apprised but who the fuck knew the way today was going. He tapped another text to Adina on his cell phone with one hand while he dialed from the desk phone with his other.

He was surprised how much he needed something cute from her to calm him down. What was it last time? He'd called her to tell her he had to postpone their date from Monday to Tuesday and she'd laughed _don't be a sad sack, be a glad bag_. And it had been so ridiculously juvenile he'd laughed harder than he had for weeks. She was good at that. Knowing what he needed to hear. Two weeks was such a short time for him to feel like this, he was almost sure something had to be wrong with him.

The phone was ringing when Kenny walked into his office without knocking. He had his Big Gulp in one hand and a sheaf of papers in the other. "Last night's logs, boss," he said, tossing them in the inbox. He jerked his chin at the phone in Mathias's hand, "Calling your _girlfriend_?"

Mathias smiled tightly at him and it must have been a little scary because he muttered an apology and walked back out again, shutting the door behind him. He got Jacob's voicemail. Beautiful. He could always call Malachi but that thought just made his head hurt worse. The longer Malachi worked for Nighthorse the more secretive he got. Mathias knew he was up to something but didn't have the will to deal with that right this second either.

Adina still hadn't responded to his texts.

He looked at the open file in front of him, then the pile in his inbox. His head was pounding.

Fuck. This.

He got up, storming his way out of the office. Kenny actually put down the Big Gulp as he rounded the corner. "I'm out for the day. Call my cell if there's an emergency."

"...Everything okay, boss?" Kenny actually looked a little concerned.

Mathias sighed, "I think I'm coming down with something. Flu maybe."

"Aw, man, that sucks." But Mathias was already out the door.

He got back in his SUV and pulled out of the parking lot. It wasn't until he was halfway off the rez that he realized where he was going. She still hadn't responded to his texts. He considered turning on the siren to shave a few minutes off the trip but he didn't think his head could take it. Instead he called her.

She'd been laughing when she answered the phone. He could hear Cady in the background and he forced himself not to take it personally that she'd rather talk to her friends than respond to a fucking text message. When he'd told her he was coming over she'd sounded immediately concerned. Well that was something, he figured.

He was driving just this side of reckless, and he wasn't even a little ashamed that he was abusing the big "Police" logo on the side of his vehicle. He was done for the day. He wasn't even entirely sure done with _what_ but he was done. He parked behind her Jeep, the SUV's tires practically squealing and he realized when he got out of the thing, he'd parked half on the sidewalk. Well, fuck that too. He slammed the door and stormed around her car, making his way up the drive to her house.

He made it halfway up the drive when he realized he hadn't been lying to Kenny when he left, he really _did_ feel like shit.

888

Adina made her way across the street as fast as she could. She wasn't going to go at a dead run, but she was definitely walking quickly. Something was not right, not right at all. He made it to her front door and she saw him peer inside, but rather than knock, or even ring the bell he just sortof slouched against the frame.

"Mathias," she called, she was on the driveway now. She raised her hand to wave but figured it would be best to just walk as quickly as possible. She was fishing her keys from her pocket by the time she got to the steps.

"Hey," he muttered, his arms crossed over his chest. He looked sullen.

"Hey," she said, a little breathless. "Hang on, let me just get the door open," she unlocked the bolt and stepped back so he could let himself in. She followed and sat her laptop down on the entry table, piling the books on top. He was standing in the middle of the living room staring at nothing. "Hey," she shut the door behind her and walked over to him, putting her hands on his cheeks. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"Fuck if I know," he muttered, reaching for her. Adina let herself be manhandled, he wrapped one arm around her waist and plunged the fingers of his other hand into her hair. She wrapped her own arms around him and let him bury his face in her neck. She held him, scratching light, easy patterns on his back.

She held him for a long time. She wasn't sure how long, actually, but long enough that she was aware of each of the muscles in his back, and the way each of them unknit slow, slowly as the tension flowed out of him. When he finally lifted his head Adina realized she was starting to get a cramp in her own neck. She let her hands slide from his back to his chest, "When was the last time you ate something," she asked softly.

He laughed shortly and shook his head, "I honestly don't remember."

She made a face, "That's what I thought, come on back." She took his hand and led him to the kitchen. When he sat down at the counter she went to the refrigerator and came back with a bag of baby carrots and a tub of hummus. "Eat that. I'm going to make you lunch and you're going to tell me what's wrong."

He arched an eyebrow at her and opened his mouth to say something sarcastic.

"No." She said shortly, "Eat."

She put a bottle of something bubbly and caffeinated in front of him and he didn't ask questions, just opened it and drank.

He was munching carrots as she pulled things from the fridge. Meat, cheese, lettuce, bread, tomatoes, mustard. She reached in the oven and pulled out a glass dish with a fresh loaf of bread inside. He furrowed his brow wondering why she kept bread in the oven and would have asked but when he caught her eye she simply pointed to the open container in front of him. He shook his head, dutifully shoveling another carrot into his mouth.

She cut two generous slices of the bread and put them in the toaster oven. Soon the room was filling with the smell of rosemary. His stomach rumbled ominously and he realized she was a genius. Why hadn't he thought to eat something before this second?

The bread came out of the toaster oven and she started slapping condiments and cheese and meat together. He realized she was building him a positively massive sandwich. She held it closed with one hand and sliced it carefully in half before carrying it over to him and placing it on the counter. "Now. Eat that. Every bite." She leaned across the counter from him and looked at him hard in the eye. "Aside from that soda have you had any caffeine today?"

He thought for a brief second about telling her about the mess in his coffee pot that morning and he decided not to bother, shaking his head again.

"Right. I'm going to brew a massive pot of coffee and you're going to drink it."

"If you insist," he said finally. The smell of the brisket and the bread and mustard in the sandwich was hitting his nose and while he'd never been a mustard guy, the combination was making him salivate. "You can't just shove food down my throat and expect it to fix everything." He warned.

"Honey." Adina gave him a look that said _of course I can you silly man, clearly you are famished and I'm just the one of us not being an idiot at the moment_.

"Right." He put the carrots and hummus aside and reached for the sandwich. Adina went to the coffee pot and started measuring. He took a bite of the sandwich and made a noise that made her smile as she poured water into the machine.

While the coffee was brewing she took two large green apples from the fruit bowl and placed them on a marble cutting board. He was focused on eating the sandwich, but he watched her slice the apples into slivers and started telling her about his day in between bites. He didn't leave anything out. Everything from his sister to the coffee to Maura to Longmire to Kenny to the car break ins. A few extra things that hadn't bugged him at the time, but looking back did now that he had a sympathetic audience.

Adina listened, saying nothing except to ask a point of clarification every now and then. By the time he'd nearly reached the end of the story the coffee was finished and he was through with the sandwich. Now that he'd had some food he realized he hadn't eaten since lunch the day before. No wonder he'd felt so awful. Adina took the sandwich plate away with the carrots and hummus. She placed a steaming mug of black coffee in front of him and a plate piled high with the two apples. Before he could reach for one she held up a finger, reaching into the cabinet above the coffee maker and removing a jar of honey. While he watched she drizzled the apples with it, thick, but not so thick it would be too sweet.

She took one of the apple slices and lifted it from the plate, letting it drip a little before offering it to him. Rather than taking it from her fingers with his own he leaned forward, his lips closing over her fingers as he took the entire sliver into his mouth. Adina smiled, pushing her finger gently against his tongue as he sucked it clean. "You're feeling better," she commented softly.

"Mm," he accepted another apple slice from her fingers, the tart of the Granny Smith with the earthy sweetness of the honey was a perfect dessert. "Thank you for taking care of me."

Adina grinned, "I'm not done yet, drink your coffee." She stepped away from the counter and wiped her fingers on a bar towel. He watched her walk around him and moaned when she placed her fingers on his shoulders and began to gently knead the muscles. How long had it been since someone had done this for him? He rolled his head back, leaning back on the bar stool so his back was resting against her breasts. Adina murmured something soft that he couldn't make out against his temple, but she didn't stop working the muscles in his shoulders with sure fingers.

She was working her way down his shoulders to the middle of his back when his phone beeped insistently. Mathias cursed in another language, long and low. His whole body was immediately tense again as he reached for the phone. She would have grabbed it first, but he was too quick for her. He pulled away from her, leaning against the counter, his tone terse. She sighed quietly, walking back around the counter to refresh his coffee.

"You're joking," he sounded like he couldn't decide if he wanted to murder the person on the other end of the line or if he just completely didn't believe them. "What was ruined?" He groaned and Adina watched all the lines that had smoothed from his face reappear. She glared at the coffee pot. "Okay, yeah, uh-huh, I'll take care of it. Thanks for the call." He stabbed his phone to end the call and made a frustrated noise that was almost a yell. Adina leaned against the counter, covering his fisted hands with her hands.

"Hey," she murmured, her thumbs rubbing gently against the back of his hands. "Tell me."

His jaw was clenched, his eyes closed. If she didn't know any better she'd think he was yoga breathing. In any case he was definitely trying to calm himself down. She waited. When he finally opened his eyes he looked so lost for a brief moment she nearly dove across the counter to hold him. He shook his head and the look was gone. "I don't fucking believe this."

He pulled away from her and downed the rest of the coffee, getting up from the bar stool. She stepped back to let him walk past her. "What happened, Mathias," she asked softly.

"I don't _fucking_ believe it," he tossed the coffee mug into the sink and it shattered. She flinched and he cursed again, wiping a hand over his face hard.

"Mathias." Adina was holding the counter behind her. "What. Happened."

"My apartment has flooded." He buried his face in his hands and laughed. It was a raw sound that she recognized. It was the sound of a person at the end of their rope. "That was my landlord."

"Jesus," she swore, "What's been damaged?"

"They caught it pretty quickly. The pipe from the neighbor's place burst. My kitchen is fucked." He shook his head. "I can't deal with this." He laughed again, running his hand through his hair, "I really cannot deal with this."

"Call him back," She said softly.

"Adina I can't-"

"Call him back. Tell him you're sending someone to take care of it. I'll go over and clean up." He looked at her like _she_ was the one having the mental breakdown.

"I can't ask you to do that," he said, leaning against the sink.

"You're not asking, I'm telling you. You do not have the emotional capacity to deal with this right now. I do. I've spent the past five years in hurricane alley, I'm good with cleaning up after flooding, it doesn't scare me. You stay here, you take a shower, you jerk off if you feel like it, you sleep, you read, do whatever is going to make you feel better. I'll go there, I'll fix what I can. And then when you're feeling like you can handle it, you can go back to your apartment and it won't suck as much as it does right now." She waved her hand, "Unless you can think of something better that's not going to leave you hating your life."

"Adina, that's too much." He could think of about five hundred reasons why it was a bad idea for her to drive over to his place. "You don't know where I live."

"So you give me your address. I have GPS. If I need to I'll call Cady for directions." She pushed out her chin and put her hands on her hips. "This is the best thing, you know it is."

"You don't have to do this," he said finally.

She laughed in his face, "Darlin' do you really think I do anything because I _have_ to?" She cocked her head. "Is there a reason you don't want me to go over there?"

"You mean other than the obvious?" He shook his head, "Making me lunch is one thing, cleaning up flood damage is a lot different."

She sighed, walking the few feet to stand directly in front of him. She placed a hand on his chest and stared up at him through a fall of hair. "You work so hard to take care of so many people," she used her other hand to cup his jaw, angling it down so he was looking her more fully in the eye. "Why won't you let someone take care of you?"

He held her gaze for one beat, then two, then he closed his eyes for a moment and the tension flowed from him. When he opened his eyes, they practically burned. "You're _sure_ you want this." He sighed, "You go over there by yourself … people are going to talk, Adina."

"And say what?" She sounded incredulous, "You got some white chick to clean your apartment for you?"

He laughed shortly but didn't say anything.

"Are you saying I won't be safe if I go to your apartment on my own?"

"I didn't say that," he said quietly, but, she thought, there was a lot he wasn't saying.

"If you want to come too, you're more than welcome, of course." She smiled gently, "But baby, I'm going to be using bleach. A lot of it. I'll have to air the place out because mold. Do you really want to deal with that, feeling like you feel right now?"

He shook his head and reached for his phone, dialing quickly. He put the call on speaker and met her gaze as it rang. Someone picked up on the third ring. "Hey Danny," he said, holding the phone between the two of them. "Listen I thought about it and I'm not going to be able to go over there until late. I'm sending someone over now to start cleaning up."

" _Oh sure, no problem. Who, your sister?"_

"No, my girlfriend. Her name's Adina, you'll know her when you see her."


	9. Chapter 9

Mathias stood under the shower head and let the water cascade over his face. Adina had given him carte blanche to do whatever would make him feel better in her house. He stretched his neck as he turned the water hotter. _Take a shower, jerk off if you feel like it,_ he laughed into the shower spray. He considered it, actually, but he was enjoying the shower too much at the moment. The kitchen and the bath were the only areas that the house appeared to have been updated. Her shower had a traditional shower head on either side and then a waterfall attachment from the ceiling. It was impossible not to step inside and be soaking within moments.

And the water pressure, he stretched again, resting his forearms on the tiled wall and moving so the jet could hit his lower back. If he didn't already think she was pretty fantastic, telling him to spend time in this shower would do it, he mused. His belly was full, he had a woman who was willing to take care of the mess that was his living space, and for the first time all day he was able to think without feeling like the world was going to collapse around him.

He hoped the apartment wasn't as bad as he was thinking it would be. His place was a lot smaller than this one, so hopefully it wouldn't take her very long to do whatever it was she was going to do. He made a face, thinking of the books, hoping they weren't beyond repair. Then he thought of Adina's face when she'd been putting food in front of him. The determination. He didn't doubt she'd be able to handle whatever had happened at his place

He grabbed her bottle of body wash, black soap the bottle said. He shrugged and poured a generous amount on a washcloth. It smelled almost like licorice. Not feminine at all. He didn't know what he was expecting, but he knew she wouldn't be the kind to go for fruity florals. He worked the cloth into a lather and began scrubbing himself down. He thought of Adina using this shower, this soap, and started to get aroused. He smirked, he was definitely feeling better.

The tile against his back was warm, he'd been in the shower long enough that the bathroom was good and steamed. He slid the cloth over his chest and stomach, then lower. Adina's heart shaped face at she'd stared up at him, her lazy, cat eyes opened wide, fierce but almost hurt as she asked him why he wouldn't let her take care of him. He shook his head, it still floored him that she'd even offer.

It wasn't like there was a shortage of women who'd be willing to play house with him if he asked. He knew if he'd called any of them they'd be all kinds of sympathetic about what happened at his place. They'd make sad noises and smooth his brow, and bring him food and sexual favors. And they might even clean his place for him like she was doing. But they'd make sure he remembered.

He straightened, stretching his arms over his head and squeezing the washcloth over himself, letting the soap run through his hair, over his face. He wondered if Adina would let him take care of her when she was done today. He knew she'd be tired, probably smell like bleach, be a little sore. He leaned back and let the waterfall spray wash over his body. He could picture it, drawing her a bath, easing her into that big garden tub and soaping her with the sponge in the basket over there.

He'd start with her chest, spend some time on her breasts, then move to her arms, tease her a little. Run the sponge beneath the water's surface over her belly, her legs. He was getting hard just thinking about it. He'd use that detachable shower head to wet down her hair. Her hair reminded him of velvet. He'd use her fancy shampoo and massage her head, then her neck. He leaned back against the wall again and wrapped his fingers around his dick.

He'd get her good and relaxed, maybe almost on the verge of sleep, then he'd climb into the bathtub with her. Let her relax against him. He'd have her indolent, like a cat against his chest. And then when the water started to cool, he'd lift her out, towel her dry with a big, fluffy towel. He'd wrap her in that robe of hers, then carry her to the bed and lay her down. His breath quickened, he knew she'd fall open for him then, her legs inviting him. He'd kneel between her legs and close his lips over her. He'd love her body and not let her offer anything in return. He'd hold her as she shook with it, and when she drifted off to sleep, with his name on her lips, he'd be happy.

He came with a shout that bounced off the tiled walls of the bathroom. Mathias let the water run over him for a while longer before he reached to turn off the faucets. He toweled himself off and stole one of her hair ties so he could put his hair in a tight, wet braid down his back. He put his shorts back on and stumbled out to the living room. When he lay down on the couch he put his phone on the coffee table by his head so if she called he'd wake up. Then he closed his eyes and slept for six hours straight.

888

Adina's face hurt. She dunked the ratty scrub brush in the bucket of bleach water and re-attacked the base board on the cabinet under his sink. She clenched her jaw and said another prayer of gratitude that the handyman had supplied the big, industrial carpet fans even though his apartment wasn't carpeted. It really wasn't the worst she'd ever seen. Not by a long shot.

"Miss Jurovics?" She lifted her head at the sound of the voice. The handyman, Danny, she corrected in her head, was poking his head in from the front door. He sounded apologetic. "Can we come in, ma'am?"

"Sure, honey, come on back!" Adina almost giggled. She felt a little bad, when she'd arrived she'd been in a proper snit. The GPS on her cell phone had gone wonky more than once and she refused to call Mathias to rescue her, so she'd called Cady. And Cady had been able to get her in the general direction she needed to be. But then she'd gotten lost again. And so she'd stopped to ask someone for directions at a lonely gas station.

The attendant had barely acknowledged her and all his landmarks were confusing. When she'd finally gotten to the apartment complex there was a lone workman's vehicle the tiny parking lot. Adina made a face at it, the truck said "plumber". So she'd jingled Mathias's keys and shouldered the bag of supplies she'd gotten from Wal-Mart.

The complex was small, just six apartments total in a boxy u-shape. Adina had walked over to his and been a little taken aback that the door was already open. She'd called a hello and let herself in, but there wasn't anyone in. She could see immediately that no one had done anything to this unit since the phone call notifying Mathias of the flood. His place was small anyway, a glorified studio, really, so she'd put her bags on the bed and walked back outside again.

"Hello?" she'd called, figuring if she yelled loud enough someone would come see what the ruckus was. She stood outside the neighboring unit and knocked. Finally a young guy, maybe twenty five, had walked out.

"Ma'am?" He'd looked her up and down and cocked his head, "Can I help you?"

"Hi," Adina had smiled her most winning smile, "I'm looking for Danny?"

"That's me," he'd smiled a little and leaned against the doorway. He was tall and fleshy, like a big teddy bear.

"I'm Adina Jurovics, I think you're expecting me? Mathias called?"

He stared, he hadn't tried to hide the fact that he gave her a once over. "You're Mathias's new girlfriend?"

"That'd be me," she grinned even though it felt a little forced, "Are you fixing all this yourself?"

"Oh, well, I gotta guy who's working on the pipe now, it's stopped leaking." He shrugged.

Adina stared at him, "You're the landlord?"

"Well I take care of the place, I live over there" he gestured to the end unit across the parking lot from Mathias's.

"Oh." Adina gestured to the other apartment, "When are you going to replace the sheetrock? I'm going to start cleaning but it'd be easier if that was done first."

"As soon as we're done on this side, this place is way worse than that one and we're pretty short handed-"

"You're fine!" Adina made sure her tone wasn't even slightly bothered. "I know you're crazy busy, I'll do what I can and then when you're ready I'll just take a break and get out of your way, how's that?"

He looked relieved, "Yeah that'll be fine, I'll just knock on the d-"

"Danny what the hell did you do to my house?!" A car door slammed and a very angry woman came storming up the lot. Danny immediately took a step back. Adina wondered if he was going to try and hide behind her. She moved away from the unit's doorway as the woman came barreling forward. "I got a message there's water all over?"

"Hey Gail, I was fixing the dishwasher so I was here when it happened."

The woman opened her mouth like she was going to say something snarky and her eye caught Adina. Adina smiled. She was an older woman, her hair streaked gray and her knuckles swollen. Danny jerked his head at her, "Gail this is Adina, Mathias's new girlfriend."

The woman, Gail, turned her attention back to Adina and Adina got why Danny had stepped back when she got there. That look was a little scary. She took in Adina from the top of her head to her scuffed Toms, "So what're you doing here?"

Adina laughed, trying to sound like she wasn't intimidated, "I offered to help clean up his place, he's a little busy at the moment." She offered her hand to the other woman to shake but the woman ignored it.

"I was wondering where he was spending time, this is the first month I haven't had to complain about the noise."

"Noise?" Adina cocked her head, a little confused.

"Yeah, he likes screamers. You a screamer?"

"Gail," Danny shook his head, but didn't meet Adina's gaze..

Adina forced herself to throw back her head and laugh. "I am, but you don't have to worry I have my own place."

"Good," the woman eyeballed her, "You're the first white woman I've seen him sniffing after."

"I do this thing with my back." Adina said as though that explained everything. "Grown men have passed out." She was being purposely flip, but she didn't care. This was getting painful.

The woman stared at her for a long time. Then she smacked Adina's shoulder and laughed long and raucous. "I like you" She cocked her head, "You here by yourself?"

"Yeah, Mathias is pretty swamped."

"Huh," Gail gave Danny a long look, "You like a cleaning lady or something?" Adina didn't say anything and the awkward silence stretched. Finally the older woman laughed again, "I'm just messin' with you, girlie. Danny get outta my way so I can see how bad you wrecked my place."

And that was that. Adina wasn't sure what she was expecting.

She wiped the back of her hand across her forehead. It was hot in the tiny apartment. Danny and the other workman walked in gingerly, stepping around her, the fan, and the pile of cleaning supplies she had spread around her. Adina hefted herself up and stretched, she had a pain in the small of her back from bending over for so long.

The workman gave her a look sidelong and then started talking to Danny in another language. Adina smiled tightly and moved to the other side of the half wall that separated the kitchen from the living area. She squatted down, the bookcase that ran along this wall didn't have any space between the bottom shelf and the floor. She was inspecting to see if the books had been water damaged at all.

For all her big talk to Cady about understanding the idea of Otherness, and not caring about being brought around here it still didn't feel great to know people were talking about you. She resisted the urge to call Trish while she worked. So far she'd used a shop vac she'd managed to cajole from Danny to suck up as much of the standing water as she could get to, she opened the dishwasher and got the water left in there as well, opened all the windows, turned on all the fans she could find, and started wiping everything down with bleach water.

Sometime during that time a woman came by she didn't know, but who apparently knew Mathias. She'd given Adina a onceover, then before she could say whatever it was she was going to say, the woman Gail had started in on her about keeping her up at night and the woman had left yelling something about calling _Matty_ later.

She straightened, these low bookcases weren't built-ins. They'd need to be moved and hosed down with bleach, the cardboard on the backside especially. She decided to start moving his books to the sofa and the bed. She snapped a few pictures of the shelves for documentation purposes and started the arduous process of moving the books and keeping them in the order he'd placed them. Adina thought of her own shelves, Trish was still shipping her library too her and while the study at the bungalow didn't look like much now, in a few weeks the shelves would be stacked three deep and packed sardine-tight. The thought of water damage or worse, having someone else move things and get them out of order.

While she worked Adina let her mind wander. She was no longer trying to make conversation with Danny or the other workman, they'd made it clear they weren't interested, and really, they were trying to work so she wasn't going to hold that against them. She cleared off the three cases, then moved them to lean against hte front of the couch. From there she used paper towels to dry the wood of the undersides and sprayed them down with a diluted bleach and lemon juice solution. The undersides she wiped down again, but there was nothing to be done about the cardboard backing. That just had to dry on it's own.

She did the same with any shelving he had whose underside had been in standing water. Then the legs of the tables and chairs and the couch and the bed. By the time she'd sprayed and wiped down everything, the workmen were long gone and it was just her. She breathed, glad she'd added the lemon juice to the bleach so the smell wasn't quite so noxious, she sprayed, she wiped, she repeated.

She worked her way through an entire bottle of bleach wiping down everything that needed it. Around five thirty she realized she was sweating and no amount of fans and cross breezes was going to help. She shed her leggings, having kicked off her shoes ages ago anyway. She filled the sink with simple oil soap, if she was going to mop his floors there was no reason they shouldn't shine, right?

At some point after the workmen had left and she'd lost her leggings, the neighbor Gail had poked her head in. Seeing she was still at it, the older woman had cackled, reminded her to hydrate, and informed her she was going bar hopping. Adina was grateful for the momentary reprieve, but hadn't wasted any time getting back to work. She was determined.

When the last corner of the place had been wiped clean she pulled the plug in the kitchen sink and watched the mop water drain. Adina leaned his mop against the kitchen wall, careful not to disturb the new sheetrock (she wondered if Danny would be back to paint it or if he'd leave it to Mathias). She was dripping with sweat and her muscles were screaming at her.

It was six thirty. She checked her phone, but other than a quick text back from Cady acknowledging her safe arrival, there was nothing. She was hoping Mathias had napped. This fierce feeling of protection was foreign to her and she wasn't entirely sure what to do with it. When he'd recounted to her his day, she'd found she was annoyed with basically everyone in his story.

Partly because she couldn't stand to see anyone taken for granted. Then because she could see how it pained him. And then the thought of Mathias, cocky, funny, unflappable Mathias being hurt over something as stupid as gossip made her positively murderous. Adina stood in the middle of his apartment. Books were still piled, bookcases were upended, furniture was shoved out of the way.

It looked like a tornado had been through. The sweat was cooling on her skin and she felt _grimy_. She made herself go to the sink and pour herself a glass of water. She suspected part of the reason her blood pressure was rising was because she was tired and hungry. But there was still so much to do. She refused to go back to her apartment until his was livable again. But the floor needed to dry, really dry, before she could begin to put things back.

All of the lower cabinetry in the kitchen was empty. Pots and pans and cleaning supplies and food stuffs were piled on the counters and the stove. She leaned against the kitchen sink and a wave of exhaustion hit her. God, she needed to sit down or she'd pass out. She thought she should see about food and then realized she didn't think if she left she'd be able to find her way back. Also, she didn't know if the pizza place delivered out here. There was nothing in his fridge. Or at least, nothing of substance. A half a tomato. A bottle of salsa.

She put the empty glass in the sink and hobbled back to the main part of the apartment. There was a space just wide enough on the side of the bed for her to sit down. Sitting felt so good she needed to lie down so she shifted some books from the bed to the bedside table, carefully moving a glasses case out of the way. She lay her head down on the pillow, not even bothering to pull her feet from the floor. The pillow smelled like him. But then of course it would, it was his pillow. She giggled a little wildly, she was punchier than she realized.

Adina resolved to close her eyes for a few seconds, she'd get up in a minute, when her back muscles stopped screaming at her. The blanket was soft beneath her and she turned on her hip, her fingers flexing in the down pillow. He really did smell divine, didn't he. She sighed, napping would be good for her, twenty minutes and then she'd wake up feeling like a new woman. That's it, just twenty minutes…

888

"Awful late getting back, ain't'cha?"

Mathias swung around, Danny was leaning in the doorway to his apartment, nursing a beer. Mathias waved as he headed across the parking lot to greet him. "Not that late," he called. All the lights were off in his apartment, but her car was still there and the door was open. He rubbed his chin, "How's my place?"

"We replaced the sheet rock in the kitchen, I'll paint it tomorrow." Danny took a sip of his beer. "That lady is still there."

"Adina?" Mathias watched Danny's face carefully. "She working in the dark?"

"Don't know, but she didn't walk home." Danny shifted his weight against the door frame. "Gina came by, Gail scared her off."

Mathias almost laughed. His sister was terrified of his neighbor. Actually most people were afraid of Gail. "I'll call her later. She say what she wanted?"

"Didn't get the chance. She was gonna talk to your girlfriend and Gail started in on her."

He snorted, it was probably better that way.

"She's friendly," Danny finished off his beer and sat the empty at his feet. "Your girlfriend."

Mathias nodded, "Pretty, too."

"Pretty white," Danny said. "You worked your way through the rez already?"

"I guess so," he said, suddenly tired. "Thanks for your help with my place, Danny."

"Just doin' my job."

It was just getting dark. The sun was still setting. Mathias turned back to his apartment and took off across the parking lot, choosing not to say what he was thinking. Adina hadn't called her texted him so he was hoping she was okay, all of a sudden he wanted to check on her, to make sure… something. He sighed, suddenly all he wanted was to get Adina and go back to her place.

He opened the screen door, it was darker in the apartment than outside. He flipped the lightswitch and surveyed the damage. It smelled better than his place had probably ever smelled. Like lemon and clean. He took a step inside, his books were piled everywhere. Bookcases empty and leaning against the sofa. He glanced at the bed and nearly burst out laughing.

She was sleeping on the bed, looking as though she'd sat down and just fallen to her side, generally lucky that her head had landed on the pillow. The leggings and shoes she'd left her apartment in where folded over a pile of books on the corner of the bed. Mathias felt a rush of tenderness for her flow through him.

She had to be exhausted. Her legs were dirt streaked and her knees were red. He walked to her and gently touched her cheek. She made a sound in her sleep but didn't wake. The fans blowing were making a sound like white noise. He stepped away from the bed and did a quick circuit of the apartment. He could see where Danny had cut the spoiled sheetrock from the wall and patched it. Everything from the lower cabinets was piled on his counters. The black plastic filter from the bottom of the fridge was fixed-when he'd left that morning he'd kicked it accidentally and it was half off the unit. Someone, Adina he thought, had cleaned the dust from the grating and replaced it, which meant she'd probably moved the whole refrigerator and cleaned beneath it.

The bathroom positively sparkled. He touched the shining faucet. There was no way his apartment had been under that much water. She would have taken it upon herself to just scrub everything down. He shook his head, he wasn't a slob, but he wasn't this neat. The clear plastic shower curtain didn't even have soap scum anymore.

He walked back to the bed and knelt beside her, he almost hated to wake her. "Adina," he said softly, his hand touching her shoulder. She made a gentle sound in her sleep and her lips curved into a small smile, but otherwise she didn't wake. "Wake up, sweet girl," he said, shaking her shoulder as delicately as he could.

She sighed, making a sound like a kitten as her brow furrowed and she opened her eyes. Her legs spasmed and he put his other hand on her knee, afraid she'd turn herself right off the bed. She moaned, rubbing a knuckle over her eyes. "What time is it?"

"Almost eight," he said.

"Shit," She sat up, the heel of her hand pressed against her eye. "Ow, my contact," she waved her other hand.

"What?" He put his hand on her cheek, "Let me see."

"I rubbed it wrong and it's in there," she whimpered. "It hurts."

"Okay," He stood up so that he was looking down at her and tilted her head back, "Let me see."

"Oh, ow," She said, curling one hand around his jeans pocket.

"Close your eyes for me," he touched her closed lid, rubbing in a touch that almost wasn't a touch, "Okay, open again?" She looked up at him and blinked rapidly.

"Oh god," she lifted a hand to her eye, she was blinking the contact out but she didn't want to touch it, "My hands are covered in bleach." The contact was on her cheek.

"Do you have another pair at your house?"

She made an affirmative sound, "I think so. I've got a spare set of glasses in my Jeep console."

"Why don't you go ahead and toss these, then?"

She nodded and took the lens off her cheek. She reached up and removed the other lens as well and reached blindly for the waste paper basket she'd placed on his bedside table with the stack of books. She looked up at him and her lips curved into a smile, "You're all fuzzy now."

He helped her to her feet and kissed her forehead. She tasted like dried sweat. "It looks fantastic, thank you."

"I'm not finished, I still need to put the books back and reorganize your cabinets, and-"

His lips silenced her. His lips held hers, it wasn't a kiss of desire. It was a stop-button of a kiss and it worked because she wasn't talking. When he lifted his head she smiled, leaning toward his chest and then immediately pulling back. He chuckled and put his arms around her, pulling her to him. She sighed into his shirt and let him pull her arms around his waist.

"I'm getting your shirt all dirty," She said against his badge.

"I don't care," he murmured, his lips against her hair. She sighed as she slid her hands into his jeans pockets. Mathias laughed shortly.

"What?" She said lazily.

"You're bone tired and you're still making a grab for my ass," he shook his head, laughing, "I feel so cheap."

"You want me to quote Song of Solomon while I do it?" She lifted her head, resting her chin on his chest so she could stare up at him. "I think I remember the dirtiest bits."

He leaned back, tucking his chin so he could look down into her eyes. His look was sardonic as he lifted one eyebrow. Adina smiled wider and it lit her whole face. He laughed, it was impossible to be even a little angry with her when she looked like that. "You'll feel better after you take a shower," he said.

"Oh god," she rolled her eyes, "A shower would be so amazing."

"Come on back, I'll set it up for you," he took a step to the side and she followed, not releasing her hold on him. He laughed, "It's going to be hard to get you back there like this," he pointed out.

Adina giggled, "You're right," She glanced down at his boots and then back up at him. "You'll take me, right?"

He quirked his head in question and she bit her lip, smiling mischievously. She stepped on top of his boots, slowly, first one, then the other and he laughed, "You want me to walk you to the bathroom like this?"

"You have to," she moved her head against his chest. "I can't see anything but your face clearly."

"Just my face," he took a step, then another.

"Well, and your neck," she moved her head and closed her lips over the button at the base of his collar, "And this button."

He laughed, "You're lucky you're cute."

"I'm adorable," she agreed. Then her smile fell a little, "I wanted to be done by the time you got back."

They were making slow progress around the bed. When he got her to the entrance to the kitchen he glanced down at her again. "You've done more in a few hours than anyone else has for me."

"That can't be true," she said, her fingers sliding out of his jeans pockets to slide up his back.

"You see anyone else in here?" He was almost to the bathroom. "You've done enough for today, Adina."

"Not as much as I wanted," she pouted, resting her forehead against his chest.

He chuckled, edging them both into the bathroom and reaching into the tiny metal shower closet to turn on the spigots. "You have done enough for today, Adina," he said again, "you're going to take a shower, and I'm going to order pizza, and then we're going to eat the pizza, and you're going to stay the night." He grinned and she resisted the urge to touch his dimples. "There might even be sex."

"No sex!" Adina said and her conviction was so strong he made a face, confused.

"No sex?"

"No sex," she stepped off his feet onto the folded towel he tossed onto the floor. She stood on tiptoe and brushed her lips across his. "I promised your neighbor I wouldn't be a screamer like the others."

Mathias laughed, "We can't have sex without you screaming?"

"I'm exhausted, my inhibitions are lower." She let him draw her tank top above her head. The bathroom was starting to steam. When he reached behind her for her bra hooks she leaned into his chest, "You should rub me," she said.

"Rub you?" He reached for her underwear, sliding it down her hips.

"Yeah, rub me," She grinned, "I'm sore, you care, you should rub me down so I don't get a cramp after the best shower ever."

"You're starting to sound like a horse," he reached up and eased her hair out of the knot she'd tied it in.

"I do let you ride me," she pointed out and then laughed, "oh God, I'm tired, I'm not even making sense anymore."

"Take your shower," he said helping her under the spray, "I'm going to go get your glasses and order dinner. Then we'll see."

"Okay," she stepped under the shower spray and shivered, "Mathias!"

He turned back, "What?"

She leaned out of the shower, dripping water onto the towel. "I don't have anything clean to wear."

He stepped back into the little bathroom and tweaked her nose. "You'll look good in my shirt."


	10. Chapter 10

The socks he left for her were thick and when she pulled them up went almost to her knees. It made her giggle that he'd made a point to ensure her feet didn't get cold. He'd left a neat pile of clothes on top of the toilet for her with her spare glasses case resting on top. The sweatpants were soft and the tee shirt had been washed so many times it was almost threadbare. She didn't bother to put her bra or underwear back on, they were both sweat soaked and gross. She also didn't bother to pull her hair back, when it was wet like this it could take all night to dry, and pulling it back would just take longer.

She stepped out of the steamy bathroom and into the apartment itself. He'd turned off all the fans except the one that turned lazily over the bed. He was putting the last of the books back on the last book case when she found him. "You work fast," she said, settling cross-legged on the now empty bed. He glanced at her over his shoulder.

"You did the hard bits." He nodded at her face, "Those are cute."

Adina smiled, "Thank you," her spare glasses were heavy-framed, made to look like a vintage cat eye but with a wood grain. They were different and she'd bought them on a whim. But she liked that they were heavy enough she could wear them while lying on the couch and not worry about getting them bent out of shape. She could also count on one hand the amount of times she'd let herself be seen in glasses by someone other than Trish.

"Food's on the way," he was focusing on reorganizing the books on the shelf.

"Thank you for dinner," she said, watching him shift books around. She'd taken them down in order, so if he was shifting things now, he was reorganizing. Adina almost asked him how he was categorizing but decided it was more fun to just watch his face. The faces he made as he looked at title and author and then considered the books already on the shelves were fascinating.

"You're welcome," he said, but his attention wasn't on her. She flopped on the bed, reaching behind her for a pillow and her phone and moving around to a comfortable position. She had a text from Trish wanting to know where the hell she'd been all day, so Adina started filling her in. She was sprawled on the bed, her legs splayed in what she could describe as a "goddess pose" if she wanted to sound like it was intentional, but really she was just sprawled with her legs open because it was comfortable.

He glanced at her every so often and Adina resisted the urge to smirk behind her phone. She couldn't decide if he kept checking on her to see if she was bored, or to see if she was still there. Trish was, of course, highly amused that Adina had "adopted the puppy" and taken it upon herself to clean his place. _So he's perm, then?_

Adina rolled her eyes, _I don't know, he's definitely fun to look at_ , she tapped back, refusing to fully commit.

 _Oh is he now?_ _Pics, please._ She laughed and Mathias looked at her over his shoulder.

"What're you laughing at," he put the last book on the shelf and bent to pick up another stack.

"Trisha doesn't believe your gorgeous," Adina said, "She's demanding photo evidence." He laughed and she smirked, "I would have taken a picture to send to her, but I didn't want you to feel _cheap_."

He put his stack of books on an empty shelf and turned to look at her, hands on hips. Adina arched an eyebrow, sitting up on her elbows just a little so she could look him in the eye. He opened his mouth to speak and then launched himself at the bed. She shrieked, fully expecting a tickle fit. What followed was somewhere between wrestling and extended groping. There was also a good bit of laughter. At some point he grabbed her phone, pulling her to him and positioning the phone to snap a picture of the both of them laughing as it turned into a round of keep away.

She was laughing when she managed to get the upper hand, or, rather, she found herself straddling him, her hand on his wrist while the other strained for her cell phone. He was holding it just out of reach. She bounced forward, almost grabbing the phone out of his hand and he flipped her on her back, his face was right against her breasts and she laughed when his lips found her nipple through the tee shirt. "You're distracting me!"

"Is it working?" He slid the phone across the bed and it ended up against the pillow.

"No," she giggled, shoving his chest. He made a move to kiss her and there was a knock on the door. Adina laughed when he collapsed against her, making a frustrated sound against her breast. "Your pizza's here."

"Your pizza," he said pointedly, climbing off the bed to answer the door. Adina flipped over and grabbed her phone. There was actually a string of pretty decent pictures on her camera roll, she sent it to Trish, _here you go, quit your whining_.

When he returned to the bed she was sitting on the edge, her feet on the floor, sitting expectantly like a good student. He laughed, putting the pizza box on the bed next to her and the two liter of soda at her feet. Adina kissed his belly through his shirt, "Are you going to stop to eat?" She said, resting her chin on his belly and staring up at him.

He smiled, lifting a tendril of hair from her forehead. "In a bit, I'm almost done."

"Want me to wait?" She said, her eyebrows lifting in question.

Mathias bent, catching her chin with his finger, "No," he said against her lips, "Enjoy your-"

"Oh for fuck's sake, she really is your girlfriend." He froze over her, clenching his jaw and closing his eyes, Adina wondered if it was in resignation or defeat. He straightened slowly and looked coolly at the woman on the other side of the screen door. She looked disgusted. Adina realized it was the woman from earlier.

"What do you want, Gina?" Mathias walked the few steps back to the screen door and put a hand on the handle, but made no move to unhook it and let her in.

"What you're not going to introduce me?"

Adina's stomach growled and she looked sadly at the pizza box. She wondered if it would be rude to start eating. She glanced back him and she could tell by the set of his shoulders he wasn't happy. He darted a quick glance at her over his shoulder and she shrugged. He sighed. "Adina, this is my sister. Gina."

"We met earlier, actually," Adina said softly. She looked past him to the woman on the other side of the door. She was a little taller than Mathias, but she could be wearing heels. She wasn't unattractive, by any means. Adina could see the resemblance when she was looking for it. They had the same eyes. She smiled at her, "Hello again."

Gina sniffed, crossing her arms under her breasts. "You wanna tell him I'm not going to rip your hair out, white lady?"

Adina laughed, "Mathias," he looked back at her and the look on his face stopped her. He rolled his eyes and turned back to the screen door. His sister stared back him looking nine thousand percent done with his bullshit. He flicked the hook on the screen door and stepped back so Gina could enter.

The screen door creaked as she stepped into the apartment. Adina had been right, she was wearing heeled boots. If it was slightly less tense, Adina would ask her where she got them because they were cute. Adina's phone buzzed, Trish was responding to her text, but she didn't move to get it. She was a little worried if she moved something disastrous would happen.

"Looks good in here," Gina nodded at Adina, "better than usual."

"Thank you," Mathias said pointedly. "What do you want, G?"

"Kenny said you were sick. I came by earlier but she was here," she shoved her hands in her back pockets. "So what gives? You sick?"

"I was," he nodded at Adina, "I was at her place."

Adina coughed, "I'm gonna...yeah," they weren't paying attention to her anyway. She opened the pizza box and grabbed a slice, then got up from the bed and went to the screen door. If they were going to fight she wasn't going to be in the middle of it. She pulled the apartment's door closed behind her.

As soon as the screen door slammed shut they started shouting. She jumped and shook her head. They weren't speaking in English and she wasn't sure she wanted to know anyway. She leaned against the door frame and took a bite of the pizza she no longer wanted.

"You always have that effect on people?" Adina jumped again, looking past the ring of light from Mathias's porch light. The orange glow of the cherry on a cigarette glowed, bobbing at waist level and she walked toward it. Gail was sitting in a foldable lawn chair outside of her own apartment. She nudged an empty chair with her pinky and Adina sank into it.

"Are they fighting about me?" She asked, turning toward the older woman. Gail snorted, flicking cigarette ash away from Adina. "Right," she sighed.

"You're not surprised, are you?" Gail took a drag of her cigarette. She eyed Adina and nodded approvingly, "Good." She blew the cigarette smoke toward the parking lot. "I didn't take you for the naive type."

"I'm not," Adina said, taking a bite of the pizza and chewing thoughtfully. "She telling him to dump me?"

"Go ask her yourself," Gail said. She laughed, "You didn't think it was gonna be easy."

"No, I guess not." Adina tossed her hair back from her face. Something thunked inside his apartment and she flinched. "They ever get violent?"

"I've never seen Mathias hit a woman," Gail said, eyeing Adina thoughtfully. After a while she said, "He's a good man."

Adina peeled a piece of pepperoni from the pizza and thought about eating it but the raised voices inside put her off it. She tossed the pepperoni slice into the dirt of the parking lot. "Would his being with me be less of a big deal if he were an asshole?"

Gail laughed that raucous laugh. It reminded Adina of a raven's caw. "I like you," she took another drag of her cigarette. "He cares about the tribe."

"He doesn't strike me as the type to let other people tell him what to do," Adina said, trying to take another bite of the pizza, but she couldn't do it.

"Either toss it or eat it, but don't play with it," Gail lifted the handle of a five gallon paint bucket and Adina realized it was a kind of trash can. Inside was about a carton's worth of cigarette butts and some empty beer cans. Adina tossed the half eaten pizza slice and Gail let the bucket fall to the pavement. She lit a new cigarette on the cherry of the old one. "He doesn't like being told what to do," she said, "but he can only be pulled in so many different directions before he gets pulled apart."

"Yeah," there was a hollow in the pit of Adina's stomach. She crossed her arms under her breasts and stared hard at his SUV. She tried to think of what Trish would say at a time like this and came up empty. She could feel Gail's eyes on her and she tried to get her breathing under control. There was no reason to cry. Not yet, anyway.

Gail's cigarette bobbed and she nodded slowly, "So it's like that."

"Hm?" Adina inhaled sharply, blinking hard so she could turn her attention back to the older woman. Gail's eyes glittered in the shadows but she didn't say anything. Adina forced herself not to blink or look away. She wasn't ashamed of having feelings for him. They were silent for a long time, listening to the rise and fall of the voices in his apartment.

"You got it bad," Gail said finally and she coughed into her fist and Adina wondered if she weren't also laughing at her.

"Do you blame me?" she sighed, shoving her fingers through her hair. It was damp and starting to frizz as it dried.

"No, I can't say that I do," She put out her cigarette and opened a beer. Whatever she was going to say was drowned out as Mathias's door slammed so hard the walls shook. Adina cried out, jerking in her seat and making the cheap aluminium creak. The screen door slammed shut and his sister stormed out swearing. She didn't acknowledge Adina or Gail and moments later her car peeled out of the parking lot. Gail touched her knee gently and Adina jumped. "You're okay," she said quietly.

Adina nodded, her movements jerking. She wiped her palms on the sweatpants. "I know," she said a little defensively. "I just…" she sighed, throwing herself back against the chair. "That surprised me," she said by way of explanation.

"Mm-hm," Gail took a sip of her beer.

She stood up, little pieces of gravel dug into her feet through the wool socks. Adina's arms tightened under her breasts and she stared down the breezeway, her back to the apartment. Her thoughts were swirling. There was quite a lot she wanted to say, but nothing she really could say without sounding like a crazy person. She forced herself to breathe, one of her hands slid up to her neck, the other fisted at her hip.

She heard the screen door creak open and closed her eyes. She had almost gotten her breathing back under control when she felt his hands on her hips. Adina let her head fall back against his shoulder. She didn't say anything when his hands slid from her hips to her belly, sliding under the hem of the shirt.

"Evenin' Mathias," Gail said, setting her beer at her feet and reaching for her pack of cigarettes.

"Hey Gail," he said, his lips were against Adina's ear. She let her eyes fall closed, proud of herself for not immediately demanding he tell her what his sister said. "You hungry? We've got plenty of pizza in there."

"That stuff'll kill ya," she said, taking a drag on her cigarette. "Gina was in a good mood."

He snorted, "Gina needs to mind her own damn business."

Adina turned her head so that her forehead rested against his jaw, "Maybe she's just worried about you."

He shifted, eyes darting from the top of Adina's head to Gail and back. "Maybe," he said carefully, his fingers tightened on her skin. "But her methods suck." She let her head fall back against his shoulder and he tucked his chin so he could meet her eye. The silence stretched.

"Son of a bitch," Gail said, finishing off her beer can and tossing the empty into the paint bucket. "I'm not going to get a damn bit of sleep tonight, am I?"

888

The darkness was different in his apartment than hers. It was heavier without streetlights and neighbors with headlights. Quieter too. She was settled against the pillow as he slid under the blankets. They'd stripped together and were under the sheets naked, but neither made a move for the other.

They'd gone back into his apartment and chatted about inconsequential things. She'd responded to Trish's texts by rote. He'd finished replacing books on the shelves. The crash she'd heard was the sound of his sister throwing books against the front door. Adina was more relieved about that than she wanted to admit.

He lay down facing her, pulling a pillow under his neck. The dark surrounded them but wasn't total. Adina could see the curve of his jaw, his eyes shining in the dark. She reached for him, her fingers curling around his jaw, her thumb brushing his cheekbone. Mathias blinked slowly in the dark. "Gail says you can only be pulled in so many directions before you're torn apart," she said quietly.

"You're not pulling me away from anything," he said softly.

"Okay," she lifted her hand from his cheek and her fingers traced his lips.

He sighed heavily, "This morning I had to tell a woman that the guys who sold her kid bad drugs won't see jail because the feds don't think they have time to deal with it." He reached for her in the dark, his hand curling over her shoulder and sliding down her rib cage. "Her son is dead. And it shouldn't have happened, but who cares, right?" His fingers tightened on her hip. "I had to beg her to file an official report. Out here people would rather go to a vigilante than the cops. Cause the vigilante can do more."

"Mathias," she slid her hand from his jaw to his chest. He closed his eyes and her heart ached for him.

"I can't do anything," he sighed, rubbing his chin against the arm that was shoved under his pillow. "There's so much...I'm fucked," he made a frustrated noise. "And no matter how much I do it's not enough."

"Sweet man," she murmured, sliding closer to him. Her fingers flexing on his chest.

"You're the one thing," he broke off, his fingers left her hip and he rubbed his hand hard over his face. He opened his mouth to speak again and abruptly closed it, rubbing his cheek against the pillow again. Adina stayed silent, watching the emotions play across his face. The frustration, the anger, the duty. She wanted to tell him that he deserved to feel supported. That a person could only give for so long before they needed to get back. She thought of what Cady had told her about the way he was treated, and the way he'd been at her house earlier. How he was now. He seemed so...lost.

"I'm here," she said finally, because she had to say something. There was so much more she wanted to say, but it wasn't the time. Actually, she realized, he didn't need someone else to talk at him, to tell him what he should or shouldn't be doing, it sounded like he was doing plenty of that himself. She inched toward him on the pillows, shifting on the mattress. The blankets were heavy on top of them and he shifted, letting her move closer. His arm curled around her on top of the blankets and she smiled in the darkness. "I'm here," she said again, just before her lips touched his.

He froze for a moment and then gave a great shudder, his hand grasped her back through the blankets. He kissed her and there was desperation there. She sighed into his mouth and kissed back, leaning into his body and giving him what he needed. She crowded his body, her breasts pressing into his chest as she eased him back onto the pillow. Her leg curled over his hip and she slid on top of him as he eased onto his back. He moaned against her lips and she deepened the kiss.

When she lifted her head to feather soft kisses over his forehead he kissed the column of her throat and she made a noise of pleasure deep in her throat. "I'm here," she whispered, her lips brushing his ear. Her fingers slid under the pillow on either side of his head and she shifted, rising over him as the blankets slid down her back. His clung to her, his arms tightening around her as her lips closed over the pulse at his throat.

His fingers tangled in her hair as she kissed down his body. She stopped at his chest, her lips closing over his nipples, first one, then the other. Her teeth and tongue made a gentle path and he groaned low. Adina smiled against his chest, her fingers exerting gradual pressure. She glanced up at his face as she traveled lower on his body. His eyes glittered in the dark and she met his gaze boldly, if this were any other time she'd be daring him to tell her to stop. Instead she let him see her intensity, the naked feeling.

When her fingers closed over his arousal he moaned and she gloried in the sound. She wondered distantly when was the last time he allowed someone to do this to him. Not just going down on him. She settled between his legs and her fingers caressed his thighs as her lips closed over the head of his penis. He let out a long, shuddering moan and she felt her lips curve into a smile against him. Adina closed her fingers around him and lifted her head briefly, running her tongue up the length of him. She worked him with her fingers as her mouth attended him.

Her lips and tongue were insistent and her fingers were supple. She curled one arm possessively around his thigh, her fingers gently caressing patterns in the skin there as she pleasured him with her mouth. His moans were low and hoarse, then longer, louder. Her lips closed over the flesh at the base of him and she tongued gently. He was rocking his hips into her, his fingers tangled in her hair. She kept up, not stopping even when he started begging.

She giggled against him and he jerked beneath her. Adina lifted her eyes, quirking an eyebrow as if to say _Oh, you like that_? He writhed beneath her and she giggled again, making another noise low in her throat. He tried to glare, but ended up closing his eyes and bucking beneath her as she sucked him harder. He was going to come soon. She could feel it. She lifted her head, her fingers didn't stop their pressure as they moved against him but she found his gaze and held it for a long moment.

She turned her head and placed an open mouthed kiss against his inner thigh, her eyes not leaving his. He groaned, the muscles in his thigh jumping. "You're going to come in my mouth," she said, her lips quirking into a smile. He grunted, his fingers digging into the sheets. Adina's fingers caressed the muscles in his belly and she watched as they jumped beneath her nails. "You're going to come in my mouth," she said again, her lips closing over his head and she sucked gently. He made a sound that was almost a yip and she resisted the urge to laugh. "Come for me, Mathias," she urged before her lips closed over him again. He exhaled and it was ragged, when he breathed in again it was too quick. She redoubled her efforts and let him dig his fingers into her skull.

His hips jerked beneath her and he groaned. Her pace quickened. He breathed her name and moaned long and loud. He grasped the headboard behind him, his hips jerking wildly. When he came it was on a long, loud cry. She took everything he had to give, lifting her head only when he'd fallen back onto the bed, spent, shaking. She pressed a kiss to his abdomen, just above his bellybutton and continued the slide back up his body.

Adina's lips closed over the hollow of his throat, "I'm right here," she repeated softly, laying back against the pillow. He followed, turning his body so that he was lying against her breasts. He was silent for a long time and she curled her leg over his, wondering if he'd fallen asleep. She trailed her fingers through his hair, staring up at the ceiling in silent contemplation.

"Thank you," he said finally, his voice hoarse.

"You're welcome," She said softly as his arms curled around her, his hand tightening possessively on her ass. Her fingers kept their traveling through his hair.

"Don't leave," he said quietly, so quietly she wondered if he hadn't spoken at all.

She stretched her neck, her lips brushing against the top of his head where it lay on her breast. "I'm right here."


	11. Chapter 11

The clock on her dash said 1:20 when she turned into the police station parking lot. This made the fourth or fifth time in as many weeks. When she walked in the man at the desk didn't bother to look up from his computer, just picked up the phone to let Mathias know she was there. Adina grinned, nonplussed, "Hey Kenny, how you doing?"

He grunted at her and typed a few words on his computer. She reached into her bag and put a large tupperware container on the counter. "What's that?" His eyes flicked from the computer to the container and back again.

"I made beignets," she said, winking at Mathias as he rounded the corner. "Kindof like a cross between a doughnut and a funnel cake. Those are for you."

"You okay with your girlfriend cooking for other people?" Kenny asked as Mathias walked over to her, sliding his fingers through the belt loop at her hip. Adina inclined her head toward him by way of hello. Mathias laughed.

"She makes those for me all the time," he took her bag and took a step down the hall with her. "You be a little nicer to her and maybe next time she'll bring you coffee too."

"I hope this is okay," she said when they reached his office. He shut the door behind her and pulled her in for a kiss. His fingers tangled in her hair and she giggled against his lips. He smelled like coffee. And whatever aftershave he used, something like hickory and rosemary. The kiss was over entirely too soon and she made a face that was almost a pout. "I'm early."

"It's okay," he grinned, circling the desk, "I was ready for a break." When he settled back in his seat his smile widened, "What's for lunch?"

Adina blushed, but she wasn't sure why. "I threw together some things," she pulled a glass container from the bag along with plates and forks and napkins. She peeled the lid from the container as he cleared his desk to make room for lunch.

"Is that sweet potato?"

"Yeah," she glanced up, "Do you not like sweet potato?"

He made a face, "Never been my thing," he poked the mixture experimentally, "I mean, I'll _try_ it."

"Thank you," Adina spooned some of the mix of roasted sweet potato, green beans, and andouille sausage onto a plate and added a thick slice of jalapeno bread. "I think you'll like it, though." She spooned some onto her own plate and settled into the chair opposite him. "How's your day going?"

Mathias rolled his eyes and speared a piece of sweet potato with his fork, "Like I said, I was ready for a break." He chewed thoughtfully. "Huh."

Adina smirked, "So it doesn't suck?" She took a bite of the sausage and made a sound of happiness. "I always forget how much I like this."

"It doesn't suck," he took a bite of the green bean, "but it is a weird combination."

"Experimentation is good for you," she said, opening a bottle of water.

"Uh huh," he sipped his own drink. "How's the book coming?"

She made a face, she'd scrapped the historical idea weeks ago but she wasn't happy about it. She wasn't really settling on a new plot that made sense. She was getting increasingly frustrated with herself. "I don't understand why I can't make something work."

"You will," his tone said he was stating the obvious but Adina didn't believe it. It was rare she had such a hard time getting started with a new story idea and it was messing with her head. She couldn't shake the feeling that Jane had been right in that fool email and it was because she'd never been in a relationship while trying to write before.

And there was no longer any doubt that they were in a relationship. She felt his eyes on her and her lips curved into a slow smile. She flicked her eyes up from the food in front of her to look at him, "You have a scar on your knee," she said, the thought occurring to her and coming out of her mouth at the same time.

His head went back, his brow furrowing. "I have a scar on my knee." He bit a green bean cleanly in two.

"Where from?" she said, settling back in her chair.

"I fell off a horse when I was twelve." He cocked his head, "Why?"

"Just curious." She sipped from her bottle. "I was thinking about it while I was making lunch today."

"You were thinking about the scar on my knee while you were making lunch," he was leaning back in his chair, eyes slightly narrowed.

"Actually I was thinking about your body in general," she winked, "I do that sometimes."

"Uh huh," he took a slow bite of sweet potato. He was learning to let her talk herself out. Adina had a way of thinking that meant she'd say what was in her head, then what she was actually thinking, and the two weren't always the same thing, but they were usually connected.

"You're doing the thing again," she said, laughing. When he raised an eyebrow she flicked her fingers at him. "The thing. That you do. I used to have a cat that would look at me like that."

"I didn't know you were a cat person," he took a sip of his water.

"I didn't know you rode." Adina took a bite of the bread. "I was just thinking this morning, it's weird, how you can be with a person and feel like you've known them for this huge chunk of time and there's still so much you don't know, you know?"

"Yep," the phone on his desk rang and he rolled his eyes, reaching for it to turn the ringer off. "People don't really share themselves in a straight line, you know?"

"That is damn philosophical," Adina let her eyes drift over the things on the wall. She'd grown up in her father's butcher shop so the idea of dead animals had never bothered her, but trophies were an oddity she still wasn't entirely used to.

"I'm not just a pretty face," he looked so self-satisfied she couldn't help the laugh. He gave her a look of mock-indignation and she was saved from responding by the knock at the door. Mathias called for whoever-it-was to come in and Kenny poked his head inside.

"Hey Mathias, Pauly's going over to the Sparrow place, Kim called, someone broke into her car." He shot a glance at Adina and looked almost apologetic. "I tried to call in here."

"It's okay," he clenched his jaw, "that's fine, thanks for the heads up." Kenny nodded at him and slipped back out again, the door clicking shut behind him. Mathias shook his head at the closed door, "I'm getting sick of this."

"What?" Adina put her empty plate on the edge of his desk and sat back in her chair. "The car thing?"

"Yeah," he put his half eaten lunch on the desk and made made a move for an open file. "Nobody ever sees anything so all we can do is write reports."

She got up from her seat and circled his desk, stepping behind his chair. "That's gotta be so frustrating," her fingers settled on his shoulders and he leaned into her touch. Her fingers were firm, gently kneading the knots that wanted to form in his neck muscles. She leaned over the back of his chair, brushing her lips against his ear, "Finish your lunch. The report can wait."

He turned his head, quickly before she could away. "How do you know?" His tone was teasing but she didn't buy it. She knew his fingers were itching to get back to work even if he didn't actually want to.

"Because I know," she nudged her chin toward his plate, "it tastes better when it's warm."

He shook his head, but he did reach for his meal. Adina straightened and began rubbing his shoulders again. He made an appreciative sound in his throat as her thumbs inched further down his spine. Silence descended and it was companionable. Eventually he finished what was on the plate and then, what was left in the bowl. Then he leaned back in the chair, letting his head fall against the headrest so he could stare up at her. Adina smirked down at him, taking the invitation. Her fingers went to his temples, gently working the muscles there as well.

She worked her way to his jaw, then the base of his skull. This wasn't the first time she'd done this for him and she was realizing that it was possibly one of the main reasons he was so happy to see her when she brought him lunch. She slid her thumbs along his jaw, her fingers brushing his hair back from his ears so she could pay attention to those as well. He groaned when she cradled his skull with one hand, using the other to knead the column of his neck. Adina smiled, if she kept this up he'd fall asleep in the chair entirely.

She was hit with a wave of something warm, an emotion that made her want to laugh and cry at the same time. She bit her lip, the urge to give voice to it was so strong it almost hurt. Her pulse quickened. He opened his eyes lazily, the smile that curved on his lips had her fingers going to his jaw, her thumbs gently tracing the lines of his dimples. She held his gaze, an answering smile curling on her own lips. Her stomach flipped. It must have shown on her face because his smile widened.

It occurred to her that the moment was perfect, that it was the kind of moment that should be savored. She wanted to freeze it, to preserve it in amber and wear it around her neck because nothing could make it better. His fingers curled around one of her wrists and he turned his head, his lips brushing her palm. He took her hand and held it to his chest, his eyes were warm as they held hers captive. The fingers of her other hand threaded their way through his hair. Her nails scratching delicately against his scalp. "Love you," he said softly.

Adina couldn't help the beat her heart skipped. Or that her stomach dropped about five stories. Her mouth had gone dry and to cover it she leaned over him, her lips hovering just over his. "You're just saying that because I'm good at what I do," her lips touched his and he let her kiss him. When she lifted her head the smile on his face actually made her palms feel a little sweaty.

Mathias reached up, curling a tendril of her hair around his finger. "You _are_ good at what you do," he let her hair slide away and traced her cheekbone. "Doesn't mean I'm not crazy about you."

She felt her heart beat quicken. Felt her cheeks flushing. She bit her lip and leaned her hip against the desk. She reached for his hand and her fingers squeezed his ring, "Me too," she said finally. When she lifted her gaze to his, he was giving her that look again. Head cocked back, eyes slightly narrowed. She wasn't kidding, she had a cat that used to look at her like that. It was a considering look. It wasn't a _bad_ look per se, it was the face he made when he was watching to see what she'd do. She wondered if he thought she was going to bolt. She knew that she wasn't responding the way most girls would when the man they were seeing told her he loved her for the first time.

She floundered, wanting to say something, anything. Her eyes landed on his car keys. They were tossed on top of his inbox. "Did Gina ever get her car fixed?"

" _What_ now?" Whatever he'd been expecting her to say, it hadn't been that. He rose from his chair to stand over her. Adina let her head fall back so she could look him in the eye.

"I ran into her a few weeks ago and she mentioned her car was dead." She shrugged, "I just wondered if she'd gotten it fixed."

He opened his mouth, then promptly closed it. Gina hadn't said anything to him about her car since that day five weeks ago when his apartment flooded. He flashed back to that fight in his apartment. Her car was fine, she'd just wanted money. "She hasn't said anything to me," he said finally, carefully. "Was it broken down?"

She shrugged, "She said she'd borrowed a friend's for the week so I gave her fifty bucks to gas it for them. It was all I had on me."

"When exactly was this?" He crossed his arms over his chest, the calm he'd been feeling twenty minutes ago long gone.

"I don't know, a week ago… Thursday I think." She pulled her hair back from her face and tied it back with the hair tie from her wrist. "Like I said I was just curious."

"You gave my sister money two weeks ago and didn't tell me," he rubbed his jaw, turning away from her to look out the window. "We had dinner that night, didn't we?"

"I mean, yeah, I think so," she reached for him but he stepped back, going to stand on the other side of the desk. "I didn't think it was a big deal."

He shot her a look that was almost frosty. At the look on her face he sighed, forcing himself to calm down. Reminding himself that she didn't know Gina. "She shouldn't have asked you for money," he said finally, running a hand through his hair.

"Well technically she didn't ask," Adina pulled away from the desk, shoving her hands in her back pockets. "I mean she was stressing about money and I happened to have cash so I gave it to her." She went to stand next to him and tried not to let the hurt show on her face when he stepped away from her. "I didn't know it was a big deal, I'm sorry."

"It's okay," he wanted to tell her she didn't know his sister and Gina may not have come right out and asked, but manipulation was one of her talents. Instead he reached into his back pocket, fishing out his wallet. "I only have thirty on me, I'll give you the rest later."

She stared at the money in his hand, suddenly nauseated. "I don't want your money, Mathias," she said finally.

"Take it anyway," he said, sliding his wallet back into his pocket. When she didn't reach for the money he shrugged, tossing it into the open bag at her feet. "Gina doesn't need your money."

He _meant_ because she had a job, and because of the casino, and because he'd taught her how to budget at least once a year since she was sixteen. But he could tell from the way Adina reared back as though she'd been slapped that that's not how she took it. "My sister is good at seeing what she can get away with," he said, trying to explain without unloading his entire family history.

Adina bit the inside of her cheek, one of her eyebrows quirking up, "You think I let myself get taken advantage of?"

"I think you have a very generous spirit," he said carefully.

"Right," there was a small hurricane happening in her chest. She forced herself to stay very still, keeping her breathing even. She bent to pick up the bag at her feet. "I need to go."

"Adina," he reached for her and she side stepped, slinging the bag over her shoulder.

She pulled the bills he'd tossed out of the bag and folded them neatly, then wedged them in his inbox under his keys. "Keep your money, Mathias."

"Adina," his fingers brushed her shoulder and she flinched, her arm coming up to shrug him off. He felt a little like he'd been punched in the gut.

She tossed her head, turning to look at him. Her eyes snapped and she laughed shortly. She lifted a hand to her hair and pulled it out of the tie she'd just put it in. "You know," she rested her hand just under her breasts, holding her diaphragm so she could feel her breathing. It was an old trick she'd learned in a yoga class ages ago. It was a way to force herself to focus on breathing. She shook her head, "You say you love me," she put a hand on his arm, "And I believe you. I really do."

"But." he prompted, wishing he could do this entire conversation over again.

"You don't want me anywhere near your life, Mathias." She touched his jaw and he pulled back. Adina closed her eyes and nodded once, as though it was exactly what she expected. "I've been killing myself trying to make friends with the people you work with. You've never once even tried to include them when I come around. And I get it, you want things separate and that's fine. But they would stop treating me like an interloper if you'd take a minute to show them _you_ didn't see me that way."

"I do not see you as an interloper." He put his hands on his hips, stepping back and then immediately stepping forward again because he'd backed into the door. "What the hell, Adina. I never asked you to make food for Kenny every week."

"No, you didn't." She clenched her jaw, "These people? This place? They mean a lot to you. I'd be an idiot if I didn't see that." She adjusted the strap of the bag on her shoulder, her hands were clammy and the only reason they weren't visibly shaking was because one was in her pocket and the other had the bag in a death grip. "And you mean a lot to me," she said finally. "So we can't really have a relationship if we can't make space for them, can we? But we end up hiding away and baby… You won't let me in." She blinked, then immediately dashed the heel of her hand against her eye so she wouldn't cry.

"I thought we were talking about my sister," he said, eyes narrowed, face giving nothing away. Adina sighed, glancing up to the ceiling briefly before looking him in the eye again.

"We are. I am not naive, I knew what she was doing and I gave her money anyway. I should have told you and I'm sorry I didn't, but I was flattered she went for it." She closed her eyes and shook her head, "I need to leave."

"You're just going to drop a bombshell like that and leave?" He stared at her for a long moment.

"Yeah, I'm going to leave," she tossed her hair off her shoulders. Wanting to tell him she didn't trust herself when she felt like this.

"Sounds about right," he took a step away from the door and reached behind him to the knob.

"What's that supposed to mean?" She flicked her eyes to the rainbow trout on the wall above his head. The office wasn't large and they were only a few feet from each other. Her fingers itched to reach for him, but she wouldn't cave. She meant everything she said and she knew she wasn't wrong, but she hated feeling like someone was angry with her. And he _was_ angry. She could feel it coming from him in waves.

It was admirable he wasn't yelling. He was considerably more controlled than she was. His anger wasn't fire, it was stone. "This is what you do, right? Things get too intense and you bail?"

"That's not fair," her eyes were shining. She was going to cry if he didn't get out of her way.

"No?" He laughed shortly, "That's not exactly what you're doing right now?"

She didn't say anything because she couldn't. There was a lot she _wanted_ to say. If she were Trish she would. She'd cut him to pieces with her words. But she couldn't make the words form. She knew if she said those things whatever fragile, beautiful thing they were making together would blow away. And the absolute bitch of it was he was actually right. She _was_ bailing because it was too intense.

"Right." he flicked open the door and stepped away from it, crossing his arms back over his chest. There were two officers talking over a file in the hall. They froze when the door opened. Adina felt her face flush with heat. She felt her mouth twist, but she didn't say anything. She was afraid if she spoke her voice would crack and she'd lose it. It was one thing to cry in front of him, it was another to do it in front of him and his entire office. He held her gaze then looked pointedly at the open door, dismissing her.

Adina crossed her arms under her breasts, feeling a little like a drowned kitten. She knew she needed to get moving but she didn't trust herself. She chewed her bottom lip, hating herself for being frozen in place. She was aware that the two people in the hall were moving on, that someone else was coming. She could hear boots scraping.

"Kenny!" Mathias's voice was like gunshot and she flinched hard. The desk clerk poked his head in the door, a full cup of coffee in his hand.

"Yeah boss?" His eyes flicked from Mathias to Adina and back. "Everything okay?"

"Walk her out, will you?" He wouldn't even look at her. She felt sick. "I have work to do."

He looked surprised, usually when Adina left she just left, it wasn't like his office was far from the main door. But Kenny shrugged, "Sure boss," he flicked a glance at Adina and she couldn't be sure but she thought she detected a note of pity there. She needed to leave right now or she'd either dissolve in a puddle or vomit. Only problem was she felt a little glued to the floor.

She looked at Mathias and hated herself for the desperation she was feeling. He made a sound of sheer exasperation and curled his fingers around her elbow, steering her bodily out of the office. "I'll call you," he bit out, his teeth clenched. It was bullshit and they both knew it. She turned to say something to him when she made it to the hall but the door clicked shut in her face. Adina closed her eyes, counting to ten silently. But the door didn't reopen. She wondered if she'd ever hear from him again.

Kenny cleared his throat behind her and she sighed turning to look at him. He gestured toward the reception area and the door. She made herself take a step, then another. When she was almost to the door Kenny opened it for her, stepping back so she could walk through. "Those beignets were good," he said, lifting his coffee cup, "Mathias was right, they're better with coffee."

She forced herself to smile, to pretend everything was normal and she was just going home after lunch with someone who meant more to her than anyone ever had and that was all and things were perfect. "I'm glad you enjoyed them."

"There's still one left, I'll make sure your dish is washed and give it to Mathias to give back to you."

She nodded, stepping through the door and tucking her hair behind her ear. "That'll be fine," she said, because it's all she could say. It was something, at least. Something was better than nothing.

888

He'd driven over to her house as soon as his shift was over to talk. Her car had been there, but the house was dark. Cady's car was gone so he figured they were out. He knew he was being childish for not calling, but he told himself if she was okay enough to go to dinner with Cady then she wasn't as upset as he thought she'd been when she'd left the station.

Then he'd had a screaming fight with his sister about the money and was so pissed off he flat refused to call Adina and apologize for effectively slamming his door in her face. Because he wasn't wrong. He wasn't proud of himself, but he wasn't going to debase himself for anyone. Wednesday came and went and part of him had hoped that she'd show up with lunch like nothing happened. But she didn't. Kenny had given the container to him to return to her and it was sitting on top of his book shelf. It was a constant reminder.

His phone rang and he reached for it, not looking up from his computer. "Hello?"

" _Hey sugarbutt, how you holdin' up?"_

He made a face and checked the caller ID. "Who is this?"

" _Trish Richards, answer the question."_

Mathias hit a few keys on the keyboard to save the spreadsheet he was working on and sat back in his chair. "I'm okay, how'd you get this number?"

" _Google, dumbass. There's exactly two police stations in that county."_

"What do you want, Trish," he tried to keep his tone even but suddenly he was pissed off. If Adina had gotten her friend to test the waters instead of calling him herself he was going to seriously let her have it.

" _I told you, I'm calling to check in. I heard you and my girl had an_ _ **epic**_ _misunderstanding."_

"I'm pretty sure we understood each other perfectly." He reached for his coffee, it had gone stone cold. Trish snorted over the phone and sounded a little like a horse with a sinus infection.

" _I doubt it."_ Her tone softened, " _Look, I'm being serious. I heard her side. And I know how Adina can be, so I can guess what happened."_ The sound of her voice changed and it sounded like she'd put him on speaker or bluetooth or something.

"Did she put you up to this?" He resisted the urge to ask about her. He told himself he didn't want to know. Then rolled his eyes because he wasn't a teenager and that was total bullshit.

" _Are you out of your damn mind? She'd rip my hair out if she knew I was talking to you."_

"I've been better," he said, clicking over to his email to keep his hands busy.

" _She's pretty devastated herself, since you asked,"_ her horn beeped and she cursed, " _fucking tourists, I swear to fuck."_

"You're not going to guilt me into calling her," he said.

" _Oh smooth your ruffled feathers, I honestly don't care if you call her or not."_ Trish slurped something loudly. " _I'm only calling to provide some background."_

"Such as?" He reached for his cell phone and pulled up the photos. There was a picture in there of Adina he'd taken one morning when she was sleeping. He'd been looking at it a lot over the past few days.

" _You know how some people are great people but they don't always make great parents?"_ Trish laughed.

"Uh huh," He closed his email and sat back in his chair again.

" _She doesn't do conflict very well, it fucks her up."_ Trish sighed, _"About the worst thing you can do to her is to give her the silent treatment."_

"Why?" he was curious in spite of himself. Adina didn't talk about her parents often. Not after the first night they were together. He could see her as a child, precocious, probably a little over-dramatic.

" _That was her dad's thing. He'd just stop talking. She cut her hair in ninth grade and he didn't talk to her for six weeks. Seriously. Six weeks. Her mom told her Reuban wouldn't go near her when she made him angry because he didn't trust himself not to hurt her."_

"Jesus."

" _Yeah. She's always been a force of nature. She seriously scared the hell out of her parents. They were these super conservative Jews, never raised voices, always at shul and she was...herself."_ The phone crackled and the sound quality changed again. He heard her car beeping and figured she'd gotten to wherever she was going. " _Listen, I love that girl like my sister, but I am telling you, you cannot spend your life being told there is something wrong with you for being yourself without forming some seriously fucked coping skills."_

"Yeah," he sighed, suddenly bone tired.

" _She is amazing. And she will spend her life trying to make you happy, but you're going to have to be the bigger person here. You kicked_ _ **her**_ _out."_

"That's not totally how that went down." He said, feeling like he should say something to defend himself, even though he was starting to feel like a colossal asshole.

" _I know, she told me, but that's how she's taking it."_ Trish's voice softened, " _Look, I like you, and I know you care about her. I'm not saying she gets a free pass, because she could have handled it better, but you do not know how proud I am of her for telling you what she did. She never would have done that two years ago. And from what she's told me-she's not wrong either."_

"You're going to tell me about my relationship now?" He felt a flash of annoyance.

Trish laughed, _"You're only pissy because you know I'm right. Don't disappoint me, dumbass."_ And the line went dead. He stared at the phone for a long moment, his mind churning. Gail had given him shit for it too. She hadn't known specifics of course, but she knew Adina hadn't been coming around, he hadn't been going there and, as she put it, he'd not been flashing his plumage at anyone else on the rez in the interim.

The bitch of it was he missed her.

Worse, he knew that day she'd been upset and he'd wanted to chase after her, but his pride stopped him. He wanted to be angry at Trisha but he couldn't muster the energy. Given how close he knew they were, he was more surprised she hadn't flown out here to yell at him in person. He looked at his phone again, swiping left. The next picture on his camera roll was one of Adina laughing, laying on the pillow in his bed and reaching for him. Her hair was wild on the pillow and she looked open and happy. Innocent.

He cursed and stood up, grabbing his car keys as he went.

888

She was sitting on the window seat in the living room. Curled up with the fluffiest blanket she could find and her favorite book, but she wasn't reading. She'd given up trying to read an hour ago. She was staring out the window at the gardenia bushes that grew along the side of the house. They had to be at least ten feet tall to grow halfway up the window like they did.

That day when she left the station she'd gotten about five miles down the road and had to pull over. She and Cady had dinner plans that night and rather than cancel she'd let Cady take her out to try and cheer her up. But honestly, trying to pretend like everything was fine when it wasn't had given her an amazing migraine that lasted for two days. And then when the migraine lifted all she could do was cry it felt like. She hated herself for being so upset.

Trish called every night and she sometimes around lunch time. She hid it well, but Adina knew she was doing it to make sure she ate. She wanted to say it wasn't needed but she knew that would be a lie. Every day she told herself today was the day she'd call him, or drive over there so they could talk. And every day she knew it would be bullshit. She kept picturing his face when he'd steered her out of his office. The way he wouldn't even look at her. She felt ashamed for something and she couldn't explain it. She felt herself tearing up again and she forced herself to focus on the gardenia blossom closest to the window frame. To trace every petal through the glass.

There was a sharp knock at the door and she jumped, nearly falling out of the window seat. She looked at the front door but couldn't see who it was through the frosted glass. She considered keeping still. Adina didn't want to see anyone any time soon. The person knocked again, more insistent this time. Then they started ringing the doorbell.

She sighed, crawling out from under the blanket. She was wearing leggings and the UNC tee shirt. Not actual clothes by any stretch, but not her pajamas. Trish made her promise three days ago she'd at least change her clothes every morning. It seemed like a little thing, but Trish was right, it _did_ make her feel slightly more human.

She shuffled to the door, feeling like an old woman. Whoever it was was going to have to deal with the fact that she looked like shit because she felt like shit. She closed her eyes, steeling herself before she opened the door. She wanted Mathias to be on the other side.


	12. Chapter 12

He was starting to think she wasn't going to answer the door at all when he saw her figure in the glass shuffle forward. She was moving slow. He stepped back as the locks clicked and the knob turned.

When she opened the door she blanched. She looked like she hadn't slept in days. He felt a rush of sympathy and his fingers itched to pull her to him, but he stopped himself. She was looking at him like she expected him to accuse her of something.

"Hi," she said softly, her voice was hoarse. It sounded like it pained her.

"Hey," he put his hand on the door jamb, leaning against it.

Adina leaned against the door, resting her head.

"Missed you Wednesday," he said softly. She didn't answer, but her eyes started to shine. "Adina," he reached for her and she didn't immediately pull away. His fingers curled in the fabric of the tee shirt and her face twisted hard. She swayed toward him and then she was in his arms, her face pressed against his neck. She was warm in his arms and he tightened his hold when he realized she was shaking.

She said something against his neck and it was muffled so he couldn't understand her. He made a questioning sound in his throat and she turned her head a little. "I'm not sorry," she said, her breath hitched. "I meant every word."

"I know," his arms tightened around her, "I should have come back sooner."

Adina shuddered and pressed her cheek to his chest. "You were right too," she murmured, "I was running away. I couldn't-I mean I can't-"

His lips brushed the top of her head and she sighed against his chest, her fingers tightening in his shirt.

"I've always been too emotional," she said finally. "I didn't want you to see me like that." She sniffed, "It's stupid, I know."

He furrowed his brow, fingers tightening in her hair, "What did you think I was going to do?"

"I don't know," she sighed, pulling away from him and catching his hand to pull him inside. "People just...I've always been too much, that's all."

He shut the door behind him and took in the house. It wasn't a mess by any means but it was messy by her standards. "Have you been sleeping on the couch?" There was a pile of blankets and pillows. She blushed, reaching for the blankets. He took the ends from the floor and helped her to fold the largest one. They worked in silence for a while, when the blankets and pillows were in a neat pile on the edge of the couch he sat down, grabbing her hand to pull her down next to him.

Adina sat facing him, her legs crossed between them. "I've been sleeping in the couch," she said finally. At the look on his face she rolled her eyes, "I know what this looks like, I've been pretty messed up all week."

"All because of-"

"No," she sighed, "I mean I was _really_ upset that day. And that's why I bolted. And then I didn't hear from you and I was afraid I wouldn't." She met his eyes and lifted a shoulder. "I know I could have gone to you, but honestly…" she bit her lip and let out a slow breath, her fingers toying with his ring, "I didn't think you wanted to see me."

He looked at her for a long moment, then traced her cheek with his finger. "What else happened, sweet girl?"

"I forgot my parents' yahrzeit." She tucked her hair behind her ears, "It's the anniversary of the death."

"When was it?" He wondered if Trish knew about this, Adina blinked and a tear tracked down her cheek.

"The day after we fought." She coughed, "I had a migraine, I couldn't get out of bed. And I was so focused on us it didn't even occur to me."

"What's traditional?" He cupped her jaw, his thumb brushing the tears from her cheek. Adina turned her face into his hand.

"You light a candle and let it burn for twenty four hours, say a prayer if you feel like." She shrugged, "Mainly, you remember." She wrapped her fingers around his wrist, holding his hand to her cheek. "If I lived closer I'd go out to the grave. Maybe, I don't know." She sighed, "My aunt called me and when she realized I'd forgotten she...wasn't kind."

He was silent, waiting for her to finish. Adina was quiet for a long moment, then she laughed shortly.

"She called me a tsatskele, she said I was an insult to their memory." Adina tossed her head, "So I've been a little depressed."

"You know that's not true," he turned on the couch so he was facing her more fully. She extended her legs so they were across his lap and he put a hand on her knee. Adina covered his hand with hers. "Your parents are proud of you, Adina."

She lifted her eyes to his and smirked, "Are they? I write sex for a living, and I'm good at it, so you know, what does that say? Or, I mean I was good at it, but I'm kindof sucking at it now. I go where the wind takes me and can't be bothered to remember them one day a year, I haven't darkened the door of a synagogue in at least ten years, and instead of being a grown up, I'd rather run away and hide from my boyfriend when I think he's not happy with me."

"You're feeling sorry for yourself," he said softly.

"Yeah," she sighed, "Tovia's call just happened at the right time is all."

"Mm," he traced the back of her hand, "You've got a point, though. You can't bolt every time we have a disagreement."

"I know," she bit her lip, "I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too," he turned her hand over and traced the lines of her palm. "We're going to fight, you know."

"Yeah, I know. I'll work on my flight instincts, I promise." She put her hand on his forearm, pulling her eyes away from his fingers to look into his. "Did you mean what you said the other day?"

"What I…" he smiled and it lit his face. Adina felt a blush blooming on her cheeks at the way he looked at her. He lifted her chin, "I meant what I said."

She arched her neck toward him and lifted her hands to his face, her fingers tracing his jaw bones. She felt her lips quirk into a smile that was almost teasing. "Say it again?"

He inclined his head, catching her lips with his. The kiss was slow, easy. She tasted like salt and mint tea. She scooted a little closer to him and he slid one arm under her knees. Adina yipped, catching his shoulders when he lifted her from the couch. He broke the kiss long enough to nudge her nose with his and his lips grazed her cheek, "I'm crazy about you," he said softly.

She laughed when he bounced her in his arms playfully. He lay her down on the bed and sat down next to her, reaching down to untie his boots with one hand. With the other he traced the inside curve of her arm. "I love your body," he kicked his feet free of the boots and stretched out beside her. His fingers threaded through her hair, "I love this hair," Adina giggled when his lips descended on hers. She turned on the bed to face him, tangling her legs with his. "These legs," he said, his hand skimming over her thigh to catch her knee and urge her leg over his hip. His lips kissed a line down her jaw, "This spot right here," he said, his teeth scraping the spot just behind her ear that he knew would make her shiver. She sighed, her leg tightening over his hip. His fingers slid beneath the tee shirt to graze over the flesh of her abdomen, "This skin," he murmured, his lips closing over her ear lobe. He pressed his hips against her at the same time he closed his hand over her breast. "This," he eased her onto her back and pressed against her. "Do you want this?"

He cupped her jaw and angled her face so he could look into her eyes. Adina's lips curved into a smile and she arched her neck to kiss him. "Yes." Her fingers went to his shirt working buttons free. He chuckled against her lips and his fingers went to the hem of her tee shirt. She lifted off the bed, letting him pull the shirt over her head in one fluid motion. She fell back against the pillows and her fingers went to his belt buckle. She whimpered when he climbed off the bed, stripping quickly.

Adina slid the leggings down her hips and kicked them off, turning over to crawl toward the center of the bed. She heard him rummage in the bedside table and grinned into the pillows. She turned her head to look at him and blushed. He was naked, hard for her, his knee was on the bed, his hand fisted in the blankets. His hair fell around his shoulders and his eyes were tender. He climbed on the bed and placed a hand on her lower back, at the place where her hips flared. His touch on her bare skin was warm.

She craned her neck to look at him and he grinned, leaning over to place a kiss on her shoulder. "Let me love you, okay?" His fingers crept beneath her bra, curling against the place between her shoulder blades. Adina tossed her head on the pillow, her hair flying around her. He bent, moving her hair away from her neck so he could kiss the column of her throat. She sighed into the blankets, her lips curving into a smile. Her eyes were closed.

Mathias unhooked her bra, easing it over her shoulders. She twisted beneath him and tossed the bra off the bed entirely. He chuckled against her skin, finding her lips. Adina moaned beneath him, reaching back to hold his head against hers. he reached up to retrieve her hand, lacing his fingers through hers and guiding it back to the pillow. She sighed against the pillow as his hands began gently kneading the muscles in her back. He worked his way down her ribcage, stopping to curve his fingers over her breasts, to work them briefly before returning to her back. Adina giggled into the pillow.

She moved her hips, arching back like a cat. He grinned, one hand leaving her back to curl over her ass, his fingers covering her bare sex. She tossed her head again, looking over her shoulder at him. When she met his gaze she grinned, "I missed you something awful," she said playfully, arching her hips again.

"Yeah?" he said, his fingers dipping to tease her. She bit her lip, reaching blindly behind her almost on instinct, but his other hand caught hers again, guiding it back to the pillow. She was warm and ready for him already. He smirked, "I can tell." She whimpered, her legs sliding open for him. Mathias climbed over her, his lips kissing a line up her spine to the base of her skull. His hand slid under the pillow and his fingers found hers. She let him grasp her hand and sighed when his chest brushed her back. "What?"

"I like that," she said softly, turning her head to find his eyes. "I like feeling you against me." His lips found her shoulder blade, "Skin on skin," she murmured, her eyes fluttering closed.

"Me too," he said, reaching down to guide himself inside her. He did it slowly, inch by inch, maybe teasing them both. Adina's breath caught and she let it out in a long sigh when he was fully sheathed. His fingers tightened on hers and his other hand naked up, sliding beneath her knee to guide her leg further up the bed to open her more fully. She caught her lower lip between her teeth and made a soft sound that could have been a moan.

His movements were unhurried, his hips moved almost lazily against hers. She clenched her muscles around him, there was powerlessness in this position. Usually she'd be touching him any way she could, urging his hips with her hands, tightening her legs around him, but this was all she could do now. She tossed her head on the pillow and whimpered. The things he was doing to her...he moved his hips a little differently and she cried out, surprised. She felt warm, safe in his arms, treasured. His lips found hers. She felt loved.

She pressed her hips back to meet him, groaning against his lips as her muscles clenched harder around him. His pace quickened just the tiniest bit and she felt a little bit of triumph. His hand left her knee and slid under her, grazing her abdomen and closing over her mound. Adina whimpered into the pillow, pressing harder against him. His fingers found her clitoris and instead of circling it he pressed, exerting gentle pressure. The feeling was oddly pleasing. She made a soft sound, realizing she was going to come like this.

"Oh, Mathias," she his name was a breathy sigh and he tightened his hold on her hand. His pace quickened again, just a little. She was making soft sounds, almost-moans, half-whimpers. He felt his own orgasm coming and his fingers flexed against her clit. She made another sound, clenching her muscles hard. He thrust hard into her, his forehead pressing into her shoulder, then thrust again, and again. Adina's own orgasm glittered around the edges, it wasn't earth shattering. It was soft, she gasped, it was precious.

He collapsed against her, then rolled, pulling her body with him so she was spooned against him. "Love you," he said quietly, his lips against her hair. His hand curled possessively on her abdomen. Adina's fingers closed over his and she squeezed his ring.

"I know," she said, pulling his other hand, the fingers still tangled with hers, around her body so they were holding each other. She fought the urge to tell him how much she loved feeling like this, his arms around her, him still inside her. She turned her head on the pillow and he took the invitation, his lips closing over hers.

They were silent for a while, Adina was drifting on the edge of sleep-real, restful sleep, the first she'd had really since the fight. "My sister's an addict," he said carefully, tightening his hold on her.

Her fingers flexed in his, but she said nothing. She rubbed the back of his hand gently with her thumb.

"Recovering, she goes to meetings," he sighed. "When you said you gave her money I was afraid she was using again."

She closed her eyes, "I'm so sorry." She untangled her hand from his and reached up to touch his face, curling her fingers around his jaw. He turned his head to brush his lips over her fingertips. "Was she?"

"I don't think so," he sighed, "but that's why."

"Mm," she twisted in his arms, pulling free of him so she could turn to face him completely. He let her settle against the pillows again and rested his hand on her hip. Adina placed a hand on his chest. "Thank you for trusting me with that."

He shrugged, "It's not like it's a big secret."

"No," she slid her hand up to caress his jaw. "But it's still a piece of you." He kissed her forehead, then brushed his lips over her closed eyelids. Adina sighed against his lips when they found hers.

"Did you ever do the thing for your parents?" he asked when the kiss ended. Adina furrowed her brow in confusion. He tucked a stray tendril of hair behind her ear, "Light the candle?"

"No," she fell back against the pillows, "I missed it so I thought-well," she laughed softly, "I was being selfish."

"You were hurting," he said, "come on," he sat up and Adina lay back on the pillows, her brow furrowing. He reached over to the far bedside table. She kept a collection of scented candles there. He looked at her pointedly and reached over her to place the candle and a lighter on her bedside table.

"You want me to do this now?" She sat up on her elbows to stare at him. He looked back at her, seeming completely comfortable with being fully nude, recently sexed, and about to complete a holy ritual for someone else's religion. She gestured between their bodies. "Like...now."

Mathias shrugged, catching her wrist and pulling gently so she was forced to sit up. When she was upright he turned her hand over and considered her palm. "Now's better than never," he said, quirking an eyebrow at her. Adina sighed, turning on the bed to reach for the candle. She crossed her legs as she did so, facing the bedside table completely.

He shifted behind her, rising up to move closer, then settling back down in the blankets. Adina cast a glance behind her, still slightly disbelieving. The look on his face was expectant. Also, slightly amused. Adina laughed, a little self conscious, but she reached for the lighter. He'd grabbed one of the unused candles and she was glad. This was still the opposite of traditional, but it was better than nothing, he was right. She glanced outside, it was actually almost close to sunset, so score another point for him, she thought. She flicked the lighter and held it to the wick. When the flame caught she put the lighter back on the bedside table and sat back, she could feel him behind her and she leaned into his chest, glad to feel his arms come up and his fingers caress up and down her forearms.

The touch was gentle, reassuring. She leaned back, resting her head briefly against his shoulder. She closed her eyes, taking a moment to center. To find the words. She opened her eyes, sitting up a little straighter. "My mother would spend all day Fridays cooking for the weekend," she said, "She'd make challah. The whole house would smell like baking bread. When I was old enough she taught me how to braid it. And she'd let me help her make it. There were always two kinds of loaves, my mother's and mine. Hers were always plain, maybe with some raisins mixed in. Mine were always more experimental." She glanced over her shoulder at him. "Once I kneaded in garlic and I didn't know about using cloves so I used the whole bulb," she felt him chuckle and she allowed herself to laugh at the memory. "She didn't warn me because she said the best way to learn was to make mistakes. The whole house reeked."

"Was it edible?" He brushed her hair back off her shoulder and kissed her temple. Adina laughed.

"Oh no." She leaned into him, "Táte tried, he ate a slice for dinner and I'm pretty sure he cried the whole time."

"How old were you?"

"Seven?" She pulled his arm around her, letting him rock her gently.

"How did they die?" Her fingers tightened on his arm at the question, but she didn't pull away.

"Drunk driver," she closed her eyes, turning her face into his neck. "They'd gone to the synagogue for shabbat dinner that Friday night. You don't drive when you're shomer shabbat, right? So they were walking home-it was only about a mile." She coughed, "If I close my eyes I could tell you every crack in the sidewalk on that route. Anyway, drunk driver went up over the curb and hit them from behind. He died instantly. She was dead by the time they got to the hospital."

He felt the first tear when it fell off her chin and hit his chest. His arms tightened reflexively around her.

"The rabbis say when you return home from Friday night shabbat an angel follows you home to be sure you get there safely." She made a sound that was almost a sob. He made an encouraging sound in his throat, fingers threading through her hair. She was silent for a long time, watching the candle flame. Finally she blinked, sitting up a little. "I remember she had to leave for a few days one summer. I think Tovia was sick? She left me with táte and he tried to use a comb on my hair." She laughed shortly, "It was one of those thin combs men keep in their back pockets, you know?"

He lifted his head to consider her hair, "How'd that go?"

"It got stuck, he tried peanut butter to get it out. It was a gross mess." She laughed, "We called Trish's mom. She ended up having to cut the comb out and she showed him how to braid my hair. That's how I wore my hair for two years after that."

He laughed with her. "Where did you get your hair from?"

"The milk man," she met his eyes and shrugged, "The color is hers, but they could never figure out where the curls came from. I mean I know the stereotype, but nobody in my family really had the hair. My grandmother said my hair was God telling them early I was going to be different."

He made a show of giving her a considering look, "I can see that."

She chuckled, "Táte would have liked you, I think."

"Yeah?" He tickled his fingers down her side and she squirmed in his arms.

"Yeah," she grabbed his hand, turning it over in her lap. She covered his hand with hers, flexing her fingers against his. "Thank you for this," she said finally. He made an affirming sound in his throat and she turned a little in his arms so she could look him more fully in the eye. "I know I haven't said the words...but I need for you to know how much you mean to me."

He grinned, "I know, I'm amazing."

Adina pushed his shoulder, "Don't be an ass, I'm being serious."

"So was I," he angled her jaw up and captured her lips with his. The kiss was easy, comforting. When he lifted his head he nodding to show acquiescence, "I know."

"Good," she sighed, resting her head against his chest. "I'm trying."

"I know," he rested his chin on her head.

"I don't want you to think I take any of this for granted," she reached up, resting her fingers against his cheek. "You mean the world to me."

He smiled, brushing his lips over her forehead. "I know."

They were silent for a long time.


	13. Chapter 13

"You've got to come see this," he was sipping coffee, staring out of his apartment window at something in the parking lot. Adina could hear a dog yapping. She looked up from the bed, a skein of yarn looped around her feet as she rolled it into a ball.

"What?" She reached down to twist the strand of yarn from beneath her toe.

"Get up and come see," he reached for the mini-blinds, fiddling so they rose a little higher. "Gail adopted a dog a few days ago."

"Really?" She set the small ball aside and reached down to remove the yarn from her feet. "In that little place?"

"It's a little dog," he held out his hand and she scooted off the bed, going to stand beside him at the window. When she was close enough he set his coffee mug aside, pulling her against him. "There," he stepped back a little so she could see around the side of her Jeep.

"What...kind of dog is that?" It was short and squat. It was wagging it's tail, or at least, it's rump, it didn't appear to have an actual tail. It's coat was wiry but patchy, as though someone had cut out mats and left the rest. Gail stood over it, a piece of something in her hand as she patiently tried to get the dog to… something. It looked like maybe "sit", but the way Gail was gesturing made it hard to tell. The dog was cocking it's head first one way, then the other as though that would help it understand.

"I think it's a terrier pug cross." He chuckled behind her, "It's missing one eye and the other one has a cataract."

"So it's blind."

"Basically." He rested his chin on her shoulder.

"And she's trying to teach it to sit." Adina turned her head an inch to look at him out of the corner of her eye. His lips quirked up in the faintest of smirks. She bit her lip to keep from bursting out laughing. "Where did she find that dog?"

"Somewhere on the rez." He shrugged, "She came back the other day with the back of her truck full of puppy pads and kibble and who knows what all."

"I think it's sweet," Adina had long suspected Gail was a little lonely. In the weeks since she and Mathias had fought, she'd been spending more time at his place and it was interesting to her how many different ways Gail had managed to visit them without actually coming over to visit. He didn't seem to mind, if anything he actively encouraged it.

"It'll be sweet when she's got it house trained." He reached for his coffee and Adina scratched the back of his other hand lightly. He had it curled possessively around her waist.

"It's good she's not so alone all the time." She glanced at him sidelong, "Nobody seems to know what to do with her."

He snorted, "She doesn't make it easy."

"She's a big softie," Adina murmured, Gail had given up trying to get the dog to sit, instead she reached down and gently fed it the piece of whatever it was in her hand. The dog finished it off and then promptly rolled over, presenting it's belly for rubbing.

"You're the only one who thinks so," Mathias shot back, finishing off what was in the mug and returning it to the side table. "Everyone else is afraid she'll take their face off."

"You're not," Adina turned in his arms and squirmed when he slid his hands in her pockets.

"I've known her for a long time." He brushed his lips against her jaw and she sighed.

"How long?" She giggled when his lips closed over her ear lobe.

"Longer than that dog's been alive," he squeezed her ass through the jeans and she jumped her body pressing against his.

"You're also a big softie," she said snaking her arms around his neck. He leaned forward to kiss her and she pulled her head back, "Why don't _you_ have a dog?"

He quirked an eyebrow and made a show of looking around, "In this little place?"

"Ass," she tugged a lock of his hair playfully, allowing him to kiss her soundly. When he raised his head she giggled, following him on tiptoe.

Mathias tweaked her nose, "We're not getting a dog."

"We?" She raised her eyebrows.

"Uh, yeah, we." He looped his finger through her belt buckle and pulled her gently to the door. "As much time as you spend over here-"

"You saying I spend too much time over here?" She lifted her chin. "What about all the time you're at my place?"

"See? There you go, we'd be at your place and the poor thing would be lonesome." He opened the door, "Come on, let her introduce you."

Adina was laughing as they walked outside. The sound carried, the mutt lifted it's head and then promptly rolled over, wriggling behind Gail's ankles. Gail turned, lifting a hand to shield her eyes from the setting sun. "Hey, I was wondering when you two were going to stop twitching at the curtains."

"I heard you found a new friend," Adina shot back, stopping at the side of her Jeep. Gail and the dog were only a few feet away. The dog cocked its head past Gail's ankle then curled its lip in an almost growl. "Friendly little guy."

Gail laughed her crow-caw laugh. "He doesn't like men. He's already snapped at Danny."

"Well that just shows he has good taste," Mathias said, "you name him yet?"

"He doesn't have a name yet?" Adina sounded positively scandalized. She crouched down, putting her hand out slowly. Not in the dog's face, but near enough he could smell her if he felt like. "Everybody should have a name," she crooned as the dog snuffled a step around Gail's ankles.

The older woman took a step to the side, nudging him forward gently with her toe. It was the encouragement he needed, he took another step toward Adina. Gail laughed shortly and reaching into the vee of her shirt to pull her cigarette case out of her bra. She met Mathias's eyes as she snapped the case open and fished out out a cigarette and her lighter. "I've been calling him Useless since yesterday. I think he's starting to respond to that."

"Useless?" Adina looked up, incredulous. The dog sniffed her hand experimentally, then quirked his head at Gail. When Gail didn't say anything he turned his attention back to Adina and licked her finger.

"Useless sounds about right," Mathias said, the dog lifted its head to sniff the air in Mathias's general direction. He made the almost-growl face again before returning his attention to Adina.

"That's terrible," Adina said, laughing as the dog let her use two fingers to scratching behind his ears. Up close he was even funnier looking than from a distance. She'd thought his coat was patchy before, but really it just stood up in some places and lay flat in others. He had the face of a pug, but had long scraggly fur hanging from his ruff and around his neck. He looked like the world's most grizzled pekingese. But oddly not like a peke at all. His tail was docked.

"Did you see about getting him fixed yet?" He made no move to the dog and Adina wondered if it was because he'd already tried and the poor thing had snapped at him or because he genuinely wasn't a dog guy.

"I called over to the vet's office in Durant. He's got an appointment in a week." Gail took a drag of her cigarette. "He doesn't like the collar you brought over."

"Probably never had to wear one before, he'll learn." Mathias put a hand on Adina's shoulder and leaned over her as though he were going to try and pet the dog. Thinking better of it he straightened, "The vet going to microchip him too?"

"It's extra," Gail said pointedly, then flicked the ash on her cigarette. "But he's going to do it."

"Good," he toyed with Adina's hair. "How's he taking the kibble?"

"Likes the soft stuff better, but we're working on it." Gail lifted her boot and stubbed her cigarette out on it, then walked the few steps to her apartment so she could drop the butt in her makeshift garbage can. "He looks a hundred times better now that he's clean."

Mathias made a sound to the affirmative and Adina lifted her head to them, the dog's coat was soft even though it was wiry. "Where'd he come from?"

"This one didn't tell you?" Gail jerked her chin at Mathias. When Adina shook her head, Gail guffawed. "Just around, plenty of stray animals around here if you know where to look."

"Uh huh," Adina shot Mathias a hard look and he stared back at her, pointedly implacable. "Well I think he's adorable."

"He's bloody useless, is what he is," Gail said. The dog's ear's perked up and he wagged his butt. Adina laughed and accepted Mathias's hand so she could rise from her crouch. "But he's learning his name, so that's a start." Gail bent from the waist, rubbing Useless's head roughly. The dog's tongue lolled and it made a sound somewhere between a yip and a bark.

"We're going to the Red Pony for dinner, you want anything?" He asked as Adina slid a hand in his back pocket.

"Nah," Gail reached down to pick up the dog and it wriggled in her arms until it's forearms were slung over her shoulder. "I can't eat that shit." She jerked her chin at Adina before turning back to her apartment, "You two have fun though."

Adina smiled and lifted her hand, Mathias stepped back to allow Gail space to pass. The old woman shot them both another look before stepping into her apartment. Useless yipped as the door closed. Adina shot him a look, "You gonna tell me where she got that dog?"

888

The bar was busy, but not so busy they couldn't find a table. By the time they were seated a waitress was ready with menus, but they waved them away. Burger and fries was perfect. She waited until their drinks had been delivered before she gave him a long, pointed look. He held her gaze for a moment, then laughed once into his beer bottle. "Danny found the dog behind the apartment building. There's a ditch back there he was clearing out."

"Uh huh," Adina took a sip of her water. He rolled his eyes at her.

"We got him inside and got the worst of the burrs off him. I tried to get him to eat but he was too scared, so he snapped at me. I woke up Gail and had her watch him while I went to Wal-Mart for some basic dog things." Adina's knee nudged his under the table and he raised his eyebrows at her, "By the time I got back they'd pretty well chosen each other."

She laughed, "Aww, I'm sorry baby."

He poked her hand, "Like I said, the dog doesn't like the men, and I'm not looking to adopt anything. And like _you_ said, Gail's a little lonesome. She can use someone to take care of." 

"Uh huh." She didn't try to hide her amusement. "Who's paying for the vet?"

"I'd already told him to bill me," he said and she threw back her head and laughed. "Yeah, go ahead and laugh," he was smiling even though his ears were tinged a little pink.

Adina covered his hand with hers, "Softie," she said, affection pulling her lips back into a smile. "Is that Kenny and Gina?"

He lifted his head in the direction she was pointing. There was a couple at the pool table, the man very carefully positioning the woman so she could make a shot. He shrugged, turning back to the table. "Looks like," the waitress was placing their food in front of them and he reached for a bottle of ketchup.

"Are they dating?" Adina took a bite of a french fry. She had a pretty good view of his sister. Gina looked confident, but weirdly shy at the same time.

He shrugged, "If they are Kenny better watch out." At her questioning look he winked, "Gina's got a nasty right hook."

"You don't care if you're sister's dating someone?"

"I didn't say _that_ ," he took a bite of his burger. "He's a good guy and they've been friends for a long time. If they want to go out, who am I to judge?"

She smirked, "Well good for them." Gina turned away from the pool table as Kenny leaned in for his own shot. She happened to catch Adina's eye and Adina winked. Gina craned her neck to see who was at Adina's table, then shrugged, waving once at Adina and turning back to the pool table, putting a hand on Kenny's back, a little lower than a friend would.

"Yep," he wiped his mouth, "Besides, he knows if he hurts her I'll kill him with my bare hands."

Adina laughed, flicking his hair playfully off his shoulder. "You're a good brother."

"Tell her that," he said, laughing. He sobered, "When do you leave?"

She made a face, "Early. The flight leaves at eleven and then I've got a two hours layover in Salt Lake."

"Are you sure you don't want me to drive you to Casper?" He finished his beer and reached for the water glass.

"Of course I want you to drive me," Adina rested her chin on her hand, "I'd love it if you came with me, even." She raised her eyebrows meaningfully, "You could meet Trish."

He gave her a long look, "You know I can't do that right now."

"I know," she made a face, "I don't want to make you do that drive that early and then turn around and go to work."

"It's only an hour and a half."

"At seven in the morning."

"I'm not the one who sucks at mornings," He polished off his burger and sat back in his chair, "besides, you really want to pay to park your car for a week?"

"Okay fine," she waved her hand, "Save my life why don't'cha." She took a sip of her water. "Thank you."

"What're you going to tell Jane?" he covered her hand on the table with his. Adina sighed.

"I'll give her the pages I've got from the new manuscript. It's not going to be what she wants, so she's going to be pissed, but I know it's good work. If she refuses to represent it I'll find someone else." He looked at her, raising one eyebrow and she blushed, "I mean that's what'll happen, I don't know what I'll actually say, though."

"Good." he rubbed his thumb over her wrist, "It _is_ good work. Cady and Trish both love it."

"Yeah," Adina made a face, "They're both sortof obligated to love it as my friends, though...what?"

"You do that to me when I'm not around?"

"What?"

"You just completely negated their opinions, you know that right?" He was laughing at her. Adina straightened, twisting her hair up off her neck.

"I did not," she pulled the ends of her hair through the knot she made so it stayed put. "I just said they're my friends."

"Right. And implied that because they're your friends they can't think the sun doesn't shine out of your ass."

She glared. Then opened her mouth to disagree. Then promptly shut it. He raised his eyebrows in challenge, lifting his chin. She deflated, "Okay fine you're right."

"So they think it's good, how about trusting them a little?" He fiddled with the bracelet on her wrist.

"You're right," she turned her hand over so she could lace her fingers through his. "They'd tell me if it sucked." She snorted, "Trish especially."

"Why are you so nervous about it?"

"It's nothing like I usually write." In the past weeks she'd decided to forget writing erotica altogether and had tried a few character exercises she used to do in college. Between that and throwing herself into the research books she'd brought with her, a plot had started to form. It was historical, but it was vastly different than anything she'd ever written before. Also, deeply personal. "I mean any time a writer's work gets rejected it sucks-"

"She hasn't rejected it yet," he pointed out.

"Yeah," she grinned at him, "tell me that a few thousand times on the drive to the airport, okay?"


	14. Chapter 14

The first thing Adina did when she deplaned in New Orleans was lean against the airport wall and wheeze. She'd forgotten how it felt like walking through soup. By the time she got to baggage claim she was remembering every time she complained about the crisp air in Wyoming and kicking herself. Trisha was leaning against the information desk in baggage claim, when Adina wheeled her carry-on to her, her friend looked up from her phone and burst out laughing. Adina tucked a limp curl behind her ear and raised a hand, "Get me the hell to a place with central air."

888

"So tell me _all_ about this guy," Trish said, waggling her eyebrows as she sipped her root beer float. They were at a cute little ice cream shop on Prytania. One of the places they used to avoid like the plague when Adina lived in town, because tourists. Adina used her spoon to poke her banana split right in the walnuts.

"You've heard most of it," she took a bite and rolled her eyes. At Trish's glare she giggled, "I mean he's...pretty great."

"Uh huh," Trish wiped her mouth. "Cute too, I'll bet."

"Yeah he is that," Adina unlocked her phone and pulled up the photo app, sliding the phone across the table to her friend. Trish swiped a left a few times. Once or twice she glanced at Adina and raised her eyebrows. Adina chose not to think about the things that were on her phone, but she didn't think there was anything particularly scandalous. The worst was maybe the picture she'd snapped of him posing in the bathroom mirror after a shower. But then, that was on his phone not hers. And the mock wrestle fight that had ensued when he'd realized he'd been caught had been almost worth it.

After a while Trish stopped and looked at one picture for a long time. "You look stupid happy," she said, sliding the phone back to her. Adina glanced at the screen and felt her lips pull back into a smile in spite of herself. That picture had been taken on the mountain. They'd gone for a hike and he'd taken her to a to a natural pool off the trail. The water had been frigid, so she couldn't be coaxed to swim, but they were sitting on a blanket on the rocks, she'd been leaning back against him, her head on his shoulder. Honestly she'd almost been asleep it had been that kind of peaceful day. He had one arm wrapped around her and she had her arms wrapped around it. He'd taken the picture and not told her, she'd discovered it a few days later.

Adina tapped the phone and the app disappeared. "I was there," she shrugged, "I am." She chuckled, "He's a shockingly good photographer," she winked, "best pictures of me I've ever seen."

Trish rolled her eyes, "I know that's right," she ducked her head as Adina tossed a balled up napkin at her in mock indignation. "It's good you're happy." She flicked her fingers, "I wasn't looking forward to turning him into a saddle."

"I'm pretty sure he'd have seven fits if he had to live the rest of his days dressage." She spooned some of the sundae into her mouth and chewed thoughtfully. "Has Jane said anything about my pages yet?"

"Nope," Trish slurped her float. "She's been a bear ever since you sent that package, girl."

"She hasn't been returning my calls." She hadn't been entirely honest with Mathias. This visit wasn't to present her work, she was pretty sure it was to defend it.

"That's not good," she pulled out her phone and scrolled through her messages. "Her divorce is getting nasty."

"Shit."

"Yeah," she put her phone back inside her bag, "she's probably worried you'll need new representation, she's never done anything that wasn't mature audiences before."

"You think?" The thought that Jane may not be able to represent her had honestly never occurred to her. She'd thought Jane would just cut her loose entirely.

"I mean, yeah, think about it. All her contacts are in contemporary romance and erotica. She's not going to know how to handle an historical. _Especially_ not an historical Young Adult." Trish made a face, "I don't think anyone at our agency is really qualified even."

"Well fuck," technically Adina worked for herself. When she had a specific book deal with a publisher she was a contract employee. So if her agent cut her loose it wasn't like she was unemployed, she just didn't have representation. That said, she hadn't been without representation in eight years and the idea of having to start from scratch in another genre was daunting. She curled her hand over her throat. "Tell me not to panic."

"Dee. Do not panic." Trish fiddled with her straw, "It's not ideal. But it doesn't suck. You know the business. Even if Jane can't do anything with the book, she'll shop it to some other agents for you. She loves you. You don't think she's going to pretend not to know you at parties, do you?"

"No," Adina rolled her eyes. "Okay, thank you, that helps."

"And it's _really_ good. Like, really. I don't even give a shit about ruffle-corset white people and I want to know what happens." Her eyes twinkled over her glass.

"Thank you," Adina blushed, "I'm really excited about it."

"Has _he_ read it yet?"

"No," she shook her head laughing. "I mean he probably would if I offered, but not yet." Trish furrowed her brow and Adina waved her hand, "Bubbe used to tell me stories about the old country, you know? All those books I brought with me, I've been reading about the conversos and the Inquisition and the things that happened and, like… my people, you know?"

Trish gave her a pointed look, "Pretty sure he can relate. Hell, I can relate and you let _me_ read it."

"Ha," she quirked her eyebrow, "I mean I know. I don't know how to explain it."

"Okay, so he doesn't see it yet," she played with her earring, "You got any idea how much I've missed hanging out?"

"Right?" Adina grinned, "It's so weird not doing Sunday breakfast!"

"Thank you! Nobody knows how to thrift store hop!" Her grin turned sly, "You know...You're not meeting with Jane until tomorrow around three…"

"Let's go," Adina took one last bite of her Sunday and grabbed her purse. "If we hurry we can make Love me Two Times before Night Shift opens."

"Yes!"

888

It was close to three in the morning when she climbed into the guest bed at Trisha's house. The phone was ringing before she'd really settled herself under the blankets. She told herself it was okay she was calling him this late because there was an hour time difference.

" _Hey_ ," he picked up on the second ring. He didn't sound like she'd woken him, but she'd learned that didn't actually mean anything. She turned over to face the french doors that led to the courtyard. Trish had a fountain out there that was subtly lit so it was a kind of night light.

"Hey," she said softly, "did you get my text this afternoon?"

" _Mm-hm_ ," she heard blankets rustling.

"Did I wake you?" She rolled over onto her back and took her glasses off, dropping them in what she hoped was her glasses case on the bedside table.

" _Nope. How's Trish?"_

"She's good, we only just got in." Adina reached up and gave her scalp a good scratch. It was much less hot in the city at night. But it was still humid as all hell.

" _Oh_?" He made a noise that could have been a laugh, " _What've you been up to all day?_ "

"Shopping mostly," Adina laughed, "we had some really spectacular gumbo for supper and then went to hear some friends of hers play." She sighed happily, "Good blues, you know? The kind that sounds like sex."

He laughed out loud, " _I wouldn't know anything about that. You'll have to introduce me sometime."_

"I think you'd enjoy it. We're in party season now. There's a parade tomorrow night for something, I can't even remember what." She stared up at the ceiling in the darkness. She could hear him breathing on the line. She rested her hand over her diaphragm. Feeling her breath. "It's so weird." She said finally.

" _What, parades?"_

She shook her head against the pillows, then remembered he couldn't see that and laughed softly. Snuggling deeper under the covers. "No, being in an empty bed."

The sound of his laughter made her smile. " _We don't spend every night together."_

"No, just most of 'em." She giggled, "Besides, if I'm at home and I miss you, I get in my car and I drive over to your place."

" _Home, huh?"_ He paused and Adina's breath caught. _"I guess you'll just have to hurry back."_

She bit her lip in the darkness, That was the first time she'd called Durant 'home' and actually meant it. But, she realized, she'd been thinking that way for a while. Her fingers flexed on her belly and she sighed. "I wish you were here."

" _Why is that?"_ She could hear his smile and it made her skin prickle into goose flesh.

"Because if you were _here_ ," she grinned in the dark, "you'd be here."

" _...That is true_ ," she heard rustling again and wondered what he was doing.

"What were you doing before I called you?" She asked, genuinely curious.

" _Thinking about you, obviously_ ," he chuckled, _"I was reading."_

"What?"

" _Doesn't matter,"_ she heard his blankets rustle again.

"How was your day?"

" _Frustrating,"_ he sighed, _"Someone thinks the saw a kid trying to break into their car but they chased him off."_

"Is this the person you've been looking for?"

" _It was some white guy_ ," he made a sound and she could see him rubbing a hand over his face in frustration, " _so I hope not._ "

"Jesus, darlin', I'm sorry," he never told her much about his job. At least not specifics. She'd spent a pretty generous amount of time googling when they first got together-specifically after Cady told her about the tension between him and the local sheriff, so she had an idea of the limitations of his position.

" _I'm so sick of this."_ There was the clink of glassware and she could see him in her mind's eye, ambling around his place, pouring himself something, glaring out of the window over the sink. " _You know, with the way things are going for every one person who comes in and fills out a report, there are maybe ten others with the same problem who don't say anything?"_

She made a sympathetic sound. Her fingers itched to be running through his hair, or rubbing his back. Something comforting. Something.

" _It was a little better for a while, and then Standing Bear decided to help."_ He snorted, _"At least Hector only worked for money."_

"What you do isn't easy," she said softly.

" _No, it's not."_ He laughed, _"I'm a damn good cop. I thought after Malachi was arrested things would get easier."_

"It sounds like you're burnt out." She wished silently he'd agreed to come with her on this trip even though it was last minute. If he'd been able to leave for a while, maybe he'd be able to breathe easier. She bit her lip, worry for him making her stomach queasy.

" _I don't get to be burnt out._ " He sighed, _"I can't fix something this broken with just Band-Aids and spit, you know?"_

"You're such a good man," she said softly. He snorted and she rolled her eyes, "I'm serious, Mathias. You think just anybody would be able to do what you do?"

" _Somebody would,_ " he shot back.

"Yeah, they probably would. But would they do it the way you do?" She closed her eyes, wondering if she was saying too much. "You think just anybody would worry like you do? Fight as hard as you do? How did the last guy who did your job run the place?"

" _Yeah, I know_ ," he sighed again.

"Do you?" She chewed her bottom lip. "People depend on you, baby. And it's a thankless job, and I'm so, so sorry that so much of it is shitty. But no one would do it like you."

He grunted and she sighed.

"This is the part of the conversation where I'd normally give you a morale boosting blow job, you know that, right?"

He laughed, " _Is that right_?"

"Uh, yeah." She let her voice drop a little, "I'd back you up against the counter-you're in the kitchen, right?" She didn't wait for a response before she plowed on, "I'd get down on my knees in front of you, and I'd slide your boxers over your hips-"

" _Adina-"_

"I'd put my mouth on you," she giggled softly in the dark, "do you know how much I love feeling you get hard against my tongue?"

" _Adina,"_ his voice sounded a little strangled. She waited a moment and he grunted again, she could hear rustling and she wondered if he were getting back into bed. _"What else?_ " he said finally.

"You're the only man I've ever been with who was uncircumcised, did you know that?" She put a hand on her belly, focusing on her breathing. "I love wrapping my fingers around you, putting my lips on your head and sucking-just a little." He made a sound and she groaned, her fingers sliding under her tee shirt to trace teasing patterns on the skin of her belly. "If I were there, on my knees in front of you? I know you'd reach down to play with my tits and I'd let you because the way your fingers feel drives me crazy." She bit her lip, "I like to look up at you when I'm down there. The look on your face when I take my mouth off your cock and go lower?" She giggled, "The first time I took your balls in my mouth I thought you were going to jump off the bed."

He laughed, _"I appreciated your initiative,_ " he said, but his voice was breathy.

"Sweet," she chuckled, then sighed, "I miss you so much, Mathias." her hand drifted lower, under the band of her panties. "Just thinking about having you next to me is making me wet."

" _Yeah?"_ he groaned long and low.

"I love it when you're in my mouth and you put your fingers in my hair," her fingers slid against her bare sex and she gasped. "I love it when it's goes from me fucking you with my lips to you fucking my mouth."

" _You like it when I come in your mouth?"_ He asked and there was urgency in his voice.

"I do," her fingers played with her clit and she sighed, "I like it when you take control, so I can fuck myself while you fuck me."

" _Fuck, Adina,"_ his breath caught and she knew he was close.

"Come for me, baby," she said softly, "I love the sounds you make when you come."

He laughed and it was just this side of ragged.

Her fingers quickened on her skin and she gasped, "You have no idea what you do to me."

" _Tell me,_ " he said, she heard his breath hitch again. " _Fuck."_

"I'm going to come soon," she threatened, "because I'm thinking about all the ways you know how to touch me. You touch me like you know my body better than I do. Like you know exactly where is best-and what's funny is you do." She moaned softly. "Mathias-"

" _Fuck_ ," he bit out and made a sound somewhere between a shout and a groan. She closed her eyes, the sound of his orgasm pushed her over and she came herself in a rush of little groans. She tried to muffle the sound.

She rolled onto her side, knowing she should get up and wash her hands but not wanting to break the stillness yet. She could hear him breathing on the line. She bit her lip, the weight of all the things she wanted to say pressing against her.

" _When do you come home?"_ he asked finally.

"Thursday afternoon. I get in pretty late, around midnight I think."

" _I'll be there_ ," he said softly.

"I know," Adina smiled gently, "how do you feel?'

He laughed, " _Surprisingly good. When you get back I'm taking a few days. We can spend some time together, sound okay?"_

"So much better than okay." She wriggled on the bed , finding a more comfortable position. "Promise me you're going to sleep now?"

" _I'm going to sleep now."_ There was a sound of rustling blankets and she could see him giving her an indulgent smile that said he thought she was being a little ridiculous but he'd do what she wanted anyway because it was easier.

"Good," she sighed, "I'll see you soon." She told herself all was well. That she'd done what she could and he was calmer, more centered now. It was a small thing, but it was all she had to give him. It was a long time before she actually fell asleep. And the feeling carried through, giving her dreams that were tense and left her wakeful. When she rose the next day she'd have the sense that something wasn't right but no clear reason why.


	15. Chapter 15

They had breakfast at a hole-in-the-wall place on the back side of Tchoupitoulas Street called The Goat. From the outside it looked a little like a river shack, but inside it was straight seventies. The walls were mirrored, but had that gold leaf design that was made to look as though the mirror was aging even though it wasn't. The floors were gold linoleum and the place was cash only. It should have been terrifying, but it had the best biscuits and gravy in New Orleans. Trish swore by it.

Adina preferred their Caprese omelette.

"Been a long time, cher," Their waitress poured Adina another helping of coffee.

"Hey Beverly, how're the twins?" She took her coffee gratefully.

"Rachel's startin' at Tulane in the Fall and Robbie's workin' on a scholarship to Alabama. Did you know you could get a scholarship to be on the bowling team?"

"You're joking!" Adina looked at Trish and she ducked her head behind a biscuit.

"I don't care as long as it's paid for, I'll say 'roll tide' with the best of 'em." Bev squeezed Adina's shoulder, "It's good to see you again, girl. I know this one is glad you're back." She jerked her chin at Trish as she poured coffee for the table next to theirs.

"That's for damn sure," Trish agreed, buttering her biscuit from the little packets they kept in the basket in the center of the table.

"You back for good or just visitin'?"

"She's a tourist now, Bev, she's got a happy-ever-after in Wyoming," Trish said, teasing.

"You got a man!" Beverly batted Adina's ponytail playfully.

Adina blushed and ducked her head.

Beverly threw back her head and laughed. "Well g'on, cher! He treatin' you good?"

Adina's blush deepened and she opened her mouth but all that came out was a giggle.

"That good, huh?" Bev gave Trish a meaningful look, "Well congratulations. That's what I like to hear," she lifted the coffee pot in the direction of the kitchen window and winked at the fry cook, who just happened to be her husband, "lovin' so good this one's got a _song_ in her heart."

"Oh my god," Adina put her hands over her face and Trish laughed so hard she choked so Bev had to whack her on the back.

Bev slung her free arm around Adina's shoulders once Trish was alright again and leaned down to hug her. "I'm happy for you, bebe," she said, "I'll remember you in my prayers."

"Thank you, Bev," It was hard to feel off when they were going to places where she was known. She'd forgotten how much she loved this city. When she first moved here The Goat was the place she worked while she looked for real, full time work. And then it was the place she went back to when she'd been published and could quit her job, but still needed occasional income to supplement advances and royalties. Bev and JR (the fry cook) were family. "I'm glad I got a chance to see you."

"Me too, sugar," Beverly fluffed her ponytail again and squeezed Trish's shoulder on her way to the next table. "Y'all be sweet, hear?"

"Yes m'am!" They said in unison, then giggled like school girls into their coffee cups.

888

Foster & Richards had an office in a converted warehouse off the docks on Tchoupitoulas. Trish had been Jane's assistant when she'd been at another agency, and then, three years ago when Jane had decided to branch out on her own she'd offered Trish the partnership. It was a savvy business decision and they made a great team. Jane and a few junior partners represented the talent and Trish ran the business end of things.

Trish was a tiger about the agency and she was Jane's match so as much as the older woman may be terrorizing her clients at the moment, she didn't mess with Trisha. Actually, not many people messed with Trisha. She was featured in the _Times-Picayune_ 's annual 30 under 30 feature the year she and Jane had opened the firm, and had mentored a new girl from Tulane's business school every year since. Adina was fiercely proud of her.

When they got to the agency the receptionist greeted them both warmly and had a coffee tray at the ready when they stepped into Trish's office. Adina made a face that was suitably impressed. The receptionist was new, but clearly she was good at what she did. Trish rolled her eyes as she shut the door behind her. "Shelby's fantastic but if my door's open she hovers."

"You're her _role model_ ," Adina said playfully.

"Shut up," Trish sat down behind her desk. "Momma told me to tell you you're welcome to come visit for Thanksgiving."

"Oh shit, that's in, like, a month." Adina laughed.

"You could bring your man…"

"Yeah, I doubt that's gonna be a thing." Adina laughed.

Trish furrowed her brow for a second then laughed, "Yeah, I'll tell her maybe Christmas."

"Good call." She sipped her coffee, "Did she like the shawl I sent her?"

"Girl, she said to tell you she needs another one in purple and Miss Ruthie at the church wants one in red, if you please." Trish's office phone rang and she glanced at it before muting the ringer.

"I'm glad," she glanced out of the bank of windows, "I cannot get over this view." There was an unobstructed view across the river and the buildings themselves were all exposed brick and glass.

"It's pretty great, right?" She laughed, "Daddy says you owe him somethin' since you're always sending momma things. He suggests a hat, but nothing with pom poms, they lack gravitas."

Adina laughed, "I'll see what I can do." Trish's father was a tenured professor of philosophy at Duke and her mother was a civil rights attorney. "No pom poms." She cocked her head, "Did he say anything about fringe?"

Trish giggled, "Please let there be fringe."

"I can do _all_ the fringe." She opened her mouth to say something more and there was a discreet knock on Trish's office door. After a moment it opened soundlessly and the receptionist poked her head in.

"I apologize for interrupting Ms. Richards. Ms. Jurovics? Ms. Foster can see you now."

"Thanks," Adina smiled at her and took a last sip of her coffee. "Can you tell Jane I'll be just one minute? We're just going to finish up here."

"Of course! I've taken the liberty of providing an extra copy of your manuscript for you during your meeting." Shelby bobbed her head and slid back out again, closing the door behind her.

Adina looked at Trish, "She reminds me of you right after college."

"Bright eyed and bushy tailed?" Trish fluffed her curls and readjusted the flower comb in her hair. "I wish I was as together as she is. She's probably going to create an app in her spare time and buy and sell us all."

"That's so fantastic," Adina resisted the urge to duck out to the bathroom and call Mathias. Partly because her stomach was still a little in knots from that feeling she had last night, and partly because the sound of his voice calmed her more than anything else. "Tell me not to panic."

"Don't panic." Trish got up from her desk and took her cell phone with her. She slung her arm over Adina's shoulder and lifted the phone. "Quick, sister selfie for momma. She doesn't believe you're actually in town."

Adina forced herself to smile as naturally as possible as Trish snapped the photo. Then again as she took another one. She knew what she was doing. Trish used selfies like Adina used breathing exercises to calm frazzled nerves. She had to admit it did help, something about the feeling of misdirection and vanity. She laughed, letting herself enjoy for the moment being back in town with her best friend and a fantastic view of the city behind them.

"Now, go in there like the gorgeous queen you are and don't let her intimidate you." Trish fluffed Adina's ponytail and adjusted her necklace like she was a kid on her first day of kindergarten. "Power pose. Do it, you know it works."

Adina rolled her eyes but did it, lifting her shoulders to her ears then letting them drop, then standing with her feet shoulder width apart, hands on her hips Peter Pan style. She held the pose for a second then caught Trish's eye and fell out of it, giggling. "I feel like Wonder Woman."

"Good, go be Wonder Woman, she kicked ass!" Trish laughed with her and ushered her to the office door. "As soon as you get out there Shelby's going to take you to Jane's office so don't worry about remembering where it is. Once your meeting is over we're going out to get our nails did to celebrate."

"Okay," Adina took a deep breath and let it out. "This is going to be good."

888

"Adina!" Jane got up from behind her desk and circled it to hug Adina hard. "You look fantastic!"

"Thank you!" Adina hugged her back, genuinely happy to see her. Jane led her over to the meeting table by her own window bank and gestured to the water pitcher and glasses. Adina shook her head no, but took the fresh copy of her manuscript and the red and black pens as well as a yellow highlighter. Shelby was seriously good at her job. Jane took the seat opposite her and put her hand on her own copy of the manuscript. It was obviously notated and had post-its sticking from it haphazardly.

Jane smiled warmly and Adina took a minute to take her in. Her hair was cut in a pixie and it look like swan down because it was snow white. Jane wore a pair of perfectly round tortoiseshell glasses that should have been hopelessly old fashioned but on her looked impossibly hip. She was a dancer in her youth and she still carried herself like a ballerina. She wore all black except for her cherry red pumps, chunky bangles, necklace and lipstick. Her nails were even matte black. "It's your best work," she said without preamble.

Adina felt her stomach drop and then she was immediately flooded with relief.

"I mean really, I know it's still rough, but Adina...I'm so proud of you."

She bit her lip, then laughed out loud. At Jane's quizzical look she waved her hand, "I'm sorry, I was so worried you'd hate it."

"Why would I hate it? It's brilliant." Jane sighed, "I know I was unfair about the other things you've sent since you went out to Wyoming." She flicked her eyes to the window, "I suppose Trish told you about Adam."

"She mentioned something," Adina reached for Jane's hand on the table and Jane held it gratefully. "I should have called you but I didn't want to pry."

"I appreciate that," She rolled her eyes, "I've been trying to keep it as quiet as possible, it...hasn't been the cleanest of processes."

"Jane, I'm so sorry," Adina squeezed her hand.

"He was cheating," she said, waving her other hand as though it was obvious, "and that violated our pre-nup so I took him to court. And now he's countersuing. I've been worried about the company because it's my only real asset."

"Oh Jane," Adina furrowed her brow, "A judge isn't going to award him your share of F&R!"

"Of course not, but we're very successful, more successful than his business ventures. I'm worried he'll be awarded alimony." She snorted, "I can't decide if, as a feminist, I'm okay with that because equality now, or if I want to punch his lights out at the audacity...so I've been a bitch around the office."

"I'm sure everyone understands," Adina was wondering how a man whose net worth was more than a million dollars was going to dare ask for alimony.

"Trish is reminding them all that she's scarier than I am when she's hormonal." Jane took her glasses off and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.

"That sounds like her." She poured them both glasses of water and handed one to Jane. "Is there anything I can do?"

"Finish this!" Jane removed her hand from Adina's and reached for her water glass. "To be perfectly honest with you I have no experience representing something like this." She grinned, "But there's a first time for everything. I have a list of places I want to contact and a few agents with experience whose brains I'd like to pick. If you'll let me, of course." She bit her lip, looking unsure for the first time, "I'll understand if you want to be represented by someone with actual experience in this genre."

"Jane!" Adina was floored. She took a sip of her water, "I'm sorry I'm a little overwhelmed, this is the opposite of how I thought this was going to go." She cracked her knuckles, "Of course I want you to represent it! I was worried you were going to cut me loose!"

"Cut you loose? When you have this?! I'm old, I'm not senile," she grinned, "It's raw, and it's honest, and it tells a story that hasn't been told. Adina this is really special. We may even be able to option a movie deal." She held up her hand, "I know that's incredibly premature, but that's how serious I am about this project."

"Well then we need to get started, don't we?" Adina was so relieved her fingers were tingling. She was also a little in shock.

"Right. So, turn to page three, I have a question about the pronunciation of your main character's name."


	16. Chapter 16

"I can't believe she loved it!" Trish sipped the champagne she'd been given by the spa attendant and flexed her feet in the water they were soaking in.

Adina laughed, "It does feel a little anti-climactic."

"I mean don't get me wrong, I'm not surprised, like I said it's brilliant, but you've been worried for _so long_." Trish rolled her eyes. "You should call your man."

"What, right now?"

"Yeah, right now, tell him the good news." She waggled her eyebrows suggestively, "Unless there's too many people around."

"Trisha," Adina put her tongue out at her but she reached in her bag for her cell phone. The call went to voicemail and she made a face, "Well so much for _that_."

"Oh whatever," Trish grabbed the phone before Adina could hang it up. Adina made a grab back for it, but couldn't because of the sides of the pedicure chairs. Trish laughed. "Hey sugarbutt. The love of your life wants you to call her as soon as you can, she's got great news. Also, she said she wants to do a few things to you that are just downright _nasty_ and I can't repeat because I'm a lady, so call her back and she'll tell you all about them. Bye!"

"Trisha!"

"What?" Trish handed the phone back to her looking totally innocent. "He likes it."

888

Mathias leaned back in his desk chair, listening to Trish's voicemail a second time. It didn't get less funny. He rested his head against the back of the chair and stared up at the ceiling, shoulders shaking with silent laughter. He could hear Adina's indignation in the background.

He was guessing this meant her meeting went well. He'd missed the call because he'd been getting coffee, but that voicemail actually made missing her call almost worth it.

Last night's phone conversation replayed in his mind and he grinned, hearing Adina say she missed him did all kinds of amazing things to his ego. Couple that with the rest of the conversation, and then what Trish said, even if it was bullshit, and Gail would say it was a wonder he could walk straight at all when he was feeling this cocky.

He chuckled, scratching his belly lightly.

"Mathias?" Kenny poked his head in the office. "Sorry to interrupt, a call just came in, there was a shooting over by the gas station."

"Any injuries?" He was already reaching for his keys.

"Yeah, I called for an ambulance already, it's pretty bad it sounds like."

888

"Okay I love that color," Trish said, lifting Adina's hand to the light. It was a kind of iridescent, turquoise that went with her coloring perfectly.

"I'm a fan," Adina giggled, "I think the last time I had my nails professionally done was the last time I was in town."

"There's a nail salon in Durant, isn't there?" Trish cocked her head, "I'm sure there is."

"There is, I've just never used it."

"You and Cady never made it a thing?" Trish sounded shocked.

"No," Adina made a face that was comically sad, "It's not the same!"

"Aww, bebe!" They laughed together and continued down the street. Trish nudged her side, "Did he get back to you yet?"

"He texted, there was an emergency on the rez, it sounded pretty serious. He's going to get back to me when he can."

"Shit," Trish sighed, "I'm sorry girl."

"It's his job. I mean as long as he's safe I'm good," Adina grinned. "Let's go shopping!"

888

Mathias felt sick. The feeling of impotent rage wasn't new. He realized his hands were shaking so he crossed his arms over his chest. Half of his department probably thought he was crazy now, he really didn't give a shit.

The Sheriff was talking to him but he'd stopped listening. His chin itched and he lifted a hand to scratch it only to realize it itched because there was a thin layer of a loved one's blood on his face. He closed his eyes for a moment to steady himself.

Longmire was still talking but he couldn't hear him past the roaring in his ears. He clenched his jaw so hard he felt dizzy. A doctor entered the waiting area. The sheriff shut up, taking a step back. Mathias lifted his head, forcing himself to unclench his jaw, to quiet the raging howl inside him.

He heard the doctor's words as if through a tunnel. _Damage too great_. _Too much blood loss. Nothing we could do_.

There was no justice on the rez.

888

Adina could hear voices in the study calling her as she walked down the hall. She'd just gotten out of the shower, her hair was twisted on top of her head and she was wearing an old tee shirt of Mathias's and a pair of yoga pants. She padded down the hall to Trisha's work area and burst out laughing.

Trish was video chatting with her parents and her father was wearing a bright green frog tea cozy on his head like a hat. "Hey, Adina!" Her parents caught Adina through the webcam before Trish saw her coming up behind her and her friend swiveled in her computer chair. Her home workstation was much larger than her office one, with the home computer screen the size of some people's tv's.

"Hi Papa Sol!" Adina said, dragging an overstuffed chair over to sit next to Trish.

"Hey baby!" Trish's mother waved happily from her seat on the sofa.

"Daddy was just saying how he needs a hat for the winter, I think that was supposed to be a hint," Trish said, taking a sip of her tea. She nodded at the pot on her desk, there was an extra, empty cup next to it and Adina helped herself.

"So is the hat I'm making you supposed to be _more_ serious than the tea cozy or less? I heard you were worried about gravatas."

Sol's teeth flashed white and he took the tea cozy off his head to return to the teapot. "I think this gentleman is plenty serious," he patted the gold crown on it's head, "he's royalty."

Trish's mother laughed so hard she snorted. When she was able to breathe normally she pulled her hair off her neck and over her shoulder, "How are you doing, baby?"

"I'm doing really well," Adina said, "I'm guessing Trish told you pretty much everything?"

"She said you were having a rough time a while back," Sol said, pouring himself a cup of tea.

"I forgot ma and táte's yahrzeit. Tovia said some shitty things." Adina sipped her tea. Trish's mother cursed colorfully.

"Renata," Sol said, a hint of warning in his voice. "We've discussed this."

"That woman isn't going to be happy until she's-"

" _Renata_."

"Adina, I apologize," Trish's mother looked contrite, "Your aunt and I do not get along."

"I remember," Adina said, trying hard not to grin.

"So onto happier things!" Sol cut in, "Trisha tells us you're seeing someone."

"Trish has been telling _everyone_ I'm seeing someone," Adina shot back. She poked Trish in the ribs, "Is it seriously that notable?"

"Girl you really want me to answer that with my parents sittin' right there?" Trish took a bite of a cookie.

"I'm seeing someone," Adina said and Renata grinned, doing a kind of dance in her seat. Adina felt herself blushing.

"So tell us about him, what does he do, do we get to meet him, is he a republican?" Sol said, his accent doing beautiful things to his vowels. Sometimes Adina liked to ask Sol deep philosophical questions just to listen to the sound of Jamaica.

She looked at Trish, "Have you told them nothing?" Trish spread her hands and Adina laughed, "His name is Mathias. He's in Wyoming. He's a cop."

"A cop…" Renata did the slow nod of withholding judgement.

"Tell her where," Trish said. Adina flicked a glance at her and was a little surprised to see she looked amused. But more at her mother's expense than Adina's, which was a definite first. Adina shrugged.

"Cheyenne Reservation Tribal Police, he's the police chief," Adina said, wondering if she'd missed something.

Renata whistled. "That's a tough gig. He from the rez?"

"Mom used to be an _activist_ ," Trish said, waggling her eyebrows.

Adina looked at her like she was crazy, "That's not hugely surprising, have you met your mom? Yes, he is."

Sol laughed loudly and poked Renata's shoulder, "She just said you're a loudmouth."

"I prefer voice-of-the-voiceless, myself," Renata sniffed, playfully readjusting her bottle-green shawl. "I spent some time working with a few radical groups before I went to law school," she explained to Adina.

"She went for a _walk_ in '78," Sol said playfully and Renata smacked him.

"I'm gonna need for you to not downplay the importance of our work," she said, then turned her attention back to Adina, "I'm glad you're happy, baby."

"Thank you, Renata," Adina got the feeling whatever was being said between Trish's parents was an old conversation.

"Have you talked to him yet?" Trish asked, ignoring her parents for a second.

"No, I tried again before I got in the shower, but I got his voicemail. He'll call me when he can, whatever's going on, I'm not trying to add to his stress."

"Probably a good call," Trish said, then they got distracted because her parents pulled them into a spirited discussion of the pros and cons of gluten free beer. Joining in a debate with a lawyer and a philosopher wasn't for the faint of heart and by the end of the hour Adina was wishing the tea Trish had made was something stronger. Like bourbon.

888

" _Hey you, it's me again. Just checking in because I was thinking about you. I hope everything's okay… call me as soon as you can, I don't care what time it is._

 _...Miss you."_


	17. Chapter 17

"You could always cut the trip short if you're that worried," Trish said, not looking up from her phone. Adina continued to methodically chip away at her manicure, but she did stop pacing in front of the bay window.

"I'm not going to cut my trip short five days because he won't call me back, that would just be silly," she chewed her bottom lip. "I'm overreacting, I'm sure everything's fine, right?"

"You're not really asking me that, are you?" Trish quirked an eyebrow and gave her a pointed look over the top of her cell phone. "That's your man, I don't know what's normal behavior."

"Yeah, I know," she blew her breath out in one long gust. "It's really odd. And I'm worried." Adina pulled her cell phone out of her back pocket and tapped the screen, "I'm going to call Cady to see if she knows what's up."

888

Gina was leaning against Kenny's desk, helping herself to a bite of his sandwich when her brother slammed his way out of his office and down the hall. She nearly choked, but managed to straighten and whirl by the time he made it to the reception area. "What the hell, Matty?"

He didn't even look at her, just kept walking right out of the building. She turned back to look at Kenny and jerked her thumb at her brother squealing tires out of the parking lot.

"What the actual fuck was that?"

Kenny shrugged, but his face was concerned. "He's been like that ever since the shooting."

Gina pinched the bridge of her nose, suddenly genuinely worried. "Is he talking to anybody?"

"Nope," Kenny lifted his Big Gulp to take a sip, thought better of it, then immediately put it back down. "He spent most of the first day over in Durant with the Sheriff. They don't think anything's going to happen, though."

Her eyes flashed, "Fuck this place, sometimes Kenny."

"It's messed up," he agreed, but he didn't seem particularly surprised. Nobody was.

"Has his girlfriend been around? She brings him lunch right?" Gina didn't really have an opinion one way or the other on Adina. She thought she was nice enough-probably a little too nice to be honest if she was willing to give a perfect stranger money just because they happened to be related to someone she was fucking, but whatever, Mathias liked her.

"She's been gone since Thursday," Kenny took a sip of his Big Gulp.

" _What?!"_ Gina could have slapped him. She loved Kenny, she really did. They'd been friends since they were kids, and he was easily the sweetest, kindest person she'd ever met, but sometimes he was an absolute idiot. "What do you _mean_ she's _gone?_ "

"Business trip or something," He actually looked a little afraid of her, "he drove her down to the airport in Casper Thursday morning before his shift. He said she went to New Orleans."

She forced herself to breathe. It wasn't Kenny's fault. It was honestly just bad timing. She put her hands on his desk and leaned forward, trying very hard not to sound as bitchy as she was feeling. "Kenny, my love," she smiled and it must have looked better than it felt because he relaxed a little. "Someone is dead and my brother is clearly cracking up, and the _one_ person left on this planet he actually talks to isn't here and that's kindof a problem."

"Lemme find her number, we can call her," He reached for his computer keyboard.

She felt relief hit her in the chest. "That is why you're my favorite," she said, and she wasn't at all surprised that she actually meant it.

888

She hadn't been able to get up with Cady. She'd tried calling Mathias again, and Trish in a fit of pique had confiscated her cell and dragged her out for lunch. Then to the most touristy fortune teller on Bourbon Street. Where she'd been told she was going to win the lottery and have three babies and no stretch marks. It had at least made her laugh.

She was in decent enough spirits that after being taken to Marie Laveau's tomb and taking the obligatory selfie in supplication, Trish had given her her phone back. They were walking through the farmer's market shopping for dinner when it went off in her hand. She glanced at the caller id and made a face.

"Telemarketer?" Trish asked as she hefted a spaghetti squash.

"I don't know, it's a Wyoming area code, but that's nobody's number I recognize."

"You've been going crazy all day, answer the phone," Trish put down the squash and reached for a few sweet potatoes instead. Adina made a face and pointed to a bunch of beets instead. Trish looked at her like she'd lost her mind as Adina tapped the button to accept the call.

"Hello?"

" _Hi, is this Adina_?"

"This is-"

" _Adina? Adina_!" There was a scuffle and the sound of some kind of struggle. Adina's head reared back a little in confusion and she made a face at Trish. What the actual hell?

"Put it on speaker," Trish said, making an apologetic look at the vegetable vender and steering Adina away from the stalls to a semi-forgotten bench behind a display of potted ferns.

"Hello?" she said again after she'd put the phone on speaker. The sounds of muffled scuffling stopped for a second.

" _Is this Adina Jurovics?_ " A male voice said, and it was at least slightly official-ish. Adina caught Trish's eye and Trish made a face.

"This is, who am I speaking to?" She shrugged her shoulders to show she had no flipping clue.

" _Hi Adina,_ " The voice sounded slightly relieved and even a little relaxed now, " _This is Kenny_ -"

"Kenny!" Adina nearly jumped off the bench, "I know something's wrong. Tell me what happened."

" _Oh she knows something's wrong,_ " said someone loudly in the background. " _Then where the hell is she?"_

"Is that Gina?"

 _Who's Gina?_ Trish mouthed. Adina waved her to shut up.

Kenny said something terse in another language and whoever was speaking in the background shut up. " _Hi Adina, have you talked to Mathias recently_?"

"No, he texted me Friday to let me know there was an emergency on the rez, but I don't know what and I haven't heard from him since. Now seriously, tell me what the fuck, Kenny. Please."

He sighed deeply and the cherry pit that had been sitting in Adina's stomach since Friday blossomed into something resembling Chernobyl. " _Okay let me just start by saying he's safe."_

"That's good," Trish said quietly, she had her arm around Adina's shoulders and her other hand was laced through Adina's hand that wasn't holding the phone. "He's safe, that's good."

"Okay, Kenny, tell me," Adina held the phone between her and Trish. The odd thing about anxiety-she'd known something was wrong for days. But now that it was descending she was strangely calm. She supposed it was the eye of the storm. Once she knew what it was she'd lose her mind, but not now.

" _Remember we've been having a problem with someone breaking into vehicles?"_ Gina said something rude in the background about him getting to the damn point already, _"Well someone tried to break into Gail Blackstone's little s10 on Friday and, well...that dog was in the car, right? And she'd just gone into the gas station to pay for gas, and she loved that dog-"_

Adina was going to throw up, "Kenny, _what_ happened."

" _He got into the truck and the dog went for him and he flung it, and Gail came out and was yelling and by the time the gas station attendant got out there he'd driven off, and Gail…"_ Kenny's voice cracked a little, " _Gail died at the hospital."_

"Oh no," Adina went limp and Trish grabbed the phone.

" _Adina, you've got to come home,"_ Gina must have taken the phone from Kenny. Her voice was coming through loud and clear. " _He's not talking to anybody. He's walking around like some god damn harbinger of doom."_

"What about Useless?" Adina said finally.

" _What?"_

"The dog," Adina straightened back up and took her phone from Trish, "what about the dog."

" _Seriously, I tell you I'm worried about my brother and you ask me about a dog?"_ Gina said something else that Adina was fairly certain was foul because it sounded like Kenny was trying to wrestle the phone back. Adina cleared her throat.

"I'm not being a shit," she said, "he'd care about the dog, that's why I'm asking."

" _I think someone took it to a vet,"_ Kenny said finally, _"Are you coming back?"_

"I'll be on the first flight out. Thank you for calling me," She hung up the phone without saying goodbye. When she turned to look at Trish she was ridiculously proud of herself for not immediately bursting into tears.

Trisha's phone was already out, "Come on, I'm calling a friend at Southwest. Let's get you home and packed. We can have you at the airport in an hour."


	18. Chapter 18

She ended up flying United because Southwest didn't fly to Wyoming. And Trish talked her into flying out first thing in the morning instead of that night. That way she wouldn't be waking him up when she went over to see him because they both knew that was basically exactly what she was going to do as soon as she got off the plane.

Adina called Cady as soon as the plans were finalized, she'd meet her at the airport in Gillette and drive her back to Durant. By the time they'd gotten back to her house she'd picked the hem of her sweatshirt out completely and Cady's car had a hundred tiny ripped threads in the passenger floor board.

When they parked Adina wiped the stray threads from her lap and looked sheepish, "I'll pay to have your car detailed, I'm so sorry."

Cady smiled and it was kind, "That's not even the worst thing someone's done in my car _this week_." She furrowed her brow, "Do you want me to go with you?"

Adina shook her head, reaching for her keys. "I don't think so, I appreciate the offer. I think we're all just freaking out because he's usually so unflappable, you know?"

Cady made a face and laughed shortly, "Yeah, I definitely get that." She got out of the car and helped Adina unload her carry on and her laptop bag. "Text or call me or something to let me know everything's okay?"

"I will," Adina put the laptop in the back seat of her Jeep and slammed the door shut, tossing her purse across the driver's seat to the passenger seat and climbing inside.

"You sure you don't want to at least go inside and shower or nap or something? You've been traveling for like six hours." At the look Adina gave her Cady rolled her eyes and stepped back, "Yeah, I wouldn't either. Okay, just drive careful."

"I will," Adina started the Jeep. "Cady?" Cady ducked her head back in toward the open driver's side door. "Thank you for everything."

Cady grinned, "Be safe!" She said, stepping back so Adina could shut the door and pull away from the curb. Adina beeped the horn twice as she pulled away, feeling at once more in control just being behind the wheel of her own vehicle.

888

She drove out to his apartment and wasn't even a little surprised he wasn't there. She used her key to let herself in and was a little shocked at the state of the place. It looked like a frat house. She was shocked he'd been able to do this much damage in three days, but then, she supposed in an apartment this small it wasn't so shocking. She used the facilities and locked the door behind her on her way out.

Against her better judgment Adina's eyes strayed to Gail's apartment. The five gallon bucket and the aluminum chairs were still outside. Her feet went to stand in front of the windows. She peered through the glass and felt like she'd been punched in the gut, Half of the apartment was already packed away. The walls were stripped bare. There were open packing containers in various stages piled everywhere.

She backed away, feeling as though she'd seen something intensely private that she shouldn't have seen. _It had only been three days_. She wondered if Gail had any family. Or if that was Mathias's doing. Or the landlord's. She felt tears welling, for all the old lady's salty ways, she was sweet and Adina would miss her. She realized she was starting to hyperventilate and practically fled back to her vehicle.

She couldn't lose it now. Later, but not now. Now wasn't about her.

She squeezed her eyes shut and started her car, picturing Gail in her mind. The crow-caw laugh. She said a mourner's kaddish on the way to the police station for her. It wasn't usual by any means, but then, Adina figured if nothing else it would amuse the old woman's spirit wherever she was. And God would understand the words helped her focus on something other than grief.

She pulled into the police station parking lot and parked, not caring she was half out of the space. Not even bothering to grab her purse. She shut off the Jeep and jumped out, wiping her face surreptitiously to catch any stray tears or anything that would make her look worse than she already did. Someone was walking out as she was walking in and she forced herself to make eye contact, to smile and nod even though she'd reached the point where she mainly just wanted to grab people and shake them until they gave her what she wanted.

Cady was right, she probably should have taken a nap.

Kenny looked up from the computer when she walked through to the reception area and did a double take. Adina almost laughed. "I must really look like shit," she said, "Is he here?"

He shook his head, "He hasn't been in today."

"Is he at least responding to _your_ phone calls?" She winced, that sounded bitchier than she meant it to. "Sorry, I haven't gotten much sleep."

"It's okay," Kenny shook his head then reached for a pile of papers on his desk, "Gina and I talked last night. There's place he liked to go when we were kids. We think he probably went there. It's pretty easy to find...If you want to wait, my shift ends in a few hours, I can take you there-"

"Do you have a map? Just show me where, I can find it," she put her hands on the desk and leaned over it, craning her head to see the folded map he was going for.

"Are you sure? I mean this isn't a national park, the trail isn't, like, state maintained, you know?"

She bit her lip to keep from laughing in his face. "I'll be okay, Kenny."

"I don't know if I'm comfortable-"

"I have a knife in my purse. My phone has an internal GPS, a compass, and a full battery. If you want, I'll take a radio with me. I know how to tell if a snake is poisonous and to avoid bears. The weather is clear and it's not going to be dark for another five hours yet." She she let out her breath slowly, "I can't think of anything else, but let me tell you truly-I have traveled to far, and have been awake too long- nothing short of an act of God is going to keep me from that man, so show me the map, Kenny."

"Show her the map, Kenny," Gina stood in the doorway, a bottle of water in her hand. Something like grudging respect on her face. Adina straightened to look her in the eye and she nodded at her, walking into the reception area and around the desk to sit in the other seat behind the desk. "Took you long enough."

"My flight was delayed," Adina said sourly, "Fucking United."

"Mm," Gina sipped her water. "Kenny's a drama queen, you're not going to be scaling a cliff side. You're just going to drive a little and then walk maybe a mile. Two tops, I forget." Kenny shot her a dirty look and she looked affronted, "What, you know it's true." She pointed to a place on the map, "See there? Circle that. That's where you want to go. If you don't see him right away there's a little cave he used to like to hole up in, but he got too big for it when he turned eleven so now he just puts his cooler there."

"Thank you," Adina circled the place on the map carefully and then marked the place where they were currently. "I went by his apartment. It looks like a badger den."

Gina snorted, "He's only ever been like this maybe once before." She made a face and it was pained. Kenny grabbed her hand and she gave Adina a long look. "He does the thing where he thinks he has to take care of everybody and then he takes it personally if something happens. I want it just to be a temper tantrum, you know? But it's more than that."

"Yeah," Adina said softly. She moved to fold the map and Gina grabbed the edge, holding it pointedly.

"Don't go out there if you're gonna fuck him up," she said quietly.

Adina's eyes flashed, "I'm not."

"You sure?" Gina pulled the map towards her chest the barest inch, "That's my brother, white lady."

She held her gaze for a long moment, Adina lifted her chin, arching her eyebrows. Gina's face didn't change. Adina nodded once, swiftly.

"Good," Gina released the map. She reached down into the cooler at her feet and brought out a liter bottle of water. "Take this. Just in case. Kenny give her the station's number."

Adina took the water and Kenny scrawled the number on the edge of the map. Adina nodded a goodbye and left as quickly as she'd come. When the glass door whooshed shut behind her Gina breathed a sigh of relief, surprised that she actually felt better. About more than just the current situation. Kenny was giving her an odd look. She raised her head and twitched her fingers in a 'tell me' gesture.

He shrugged, taking a noisy slurp of his Big Gulp, "Women are scary, man."

888

Adina parked the Jeep on the edge of the clearing and was more than a little relieved to see his vehicle on the opposite edge of the clearing. Of course, she was assuming it was his vehicle. It was a Tribal Police SUV. She got out of the Jeep and grabbed the map, her phone, the knife, and the bottle of water. She locked the Jeep and took a second to pull her hair up into a high ponytail, tie her sweat shirt around her waist and shove the phone in her pocket. It'd been a long time since she'd gone essentially hiking on her own.

Although Gina had been right so far, this place was only a twenty minute drive from the station. She walked across the clearing and peered into the SUV. There was a travel coffee mug and takeout wrappers and other detritus accumulating in the passenger seat. _Badger_ , she thought, it must be his. She pulled out the map and took off.

The last time she'd done something like this she'd been backpacking in New Zealand. She snorted, so yeah, she TOTALLY knew what she was doing. At least the walk was pretty. As she went up the side of the hill she thought that chuck's were probably the opposite of the shoes she should have been wearing for this.

Oh well, she rolled her eyes, she was pretty sure there was a proverb or a folk tale somewhere about a woman proving her devotion by walking up a staircase of a thousand steps barefoot or something. This felt like that. Except she wasn't going to throw herself off of it when she got to the top.

She thought of all the times she'd called him over the past few days. The texts. The worry. She realized she was starting to get pissed off. She told herself she was just tired, but no, she realized she'd started to get a little pissed off when Gina had said "temper tantrum". She stopped to check the map and wiped her forehead. It wasn't hot-hot by any stretch. She'd just come from a city of soup, so really, it was small wonder she wasn't wearing the sweatshirt and shivering, but the pace she was going wasn't slow, and she was going uphill.

She checked her phone in relation to the map. It looked like it was going to be closer to two miles than one. Oh well. She was making good time. When this was over she was going to take a helluva nap. And a bath. Oh god was she going to take a bath in that garden tub in her house. She took a long sip of the water, she needed to calm down before she got to where she was going or she was going to happily murder him, she realized.

She closed her eyes, trying for yoga breathing. Fairly certain Gail would find this turn of events positively hilarious. She took off on the trail again. What was it ma would say when she was angry? _Migulgl zol er vern in a henglayhter, by tog zol er hengen, un bay nakht zol er brenen._

Roughly translated: He should be transformed into a chandelier, to hang by day and burn by night.

Oh yeah, she was getting punchy, she hadn't thought about yiddish curses in a long time. They were incredibly specific. Also, incredibly poetic. She smirked as she rounded a bend. Her grandmother's favorite: _Got zol gebn, er zol hobn altsding vos zayn harts glist, nor er zol zayn geleymt oyf ale ayvers un nit kenen rirn mit der tsung_.

God should bestow him with everything his heart desires, but he should be unable to use his limbs and have no tongue.

The trail ended. It didn't so much end, as the cliff face fell off and the trail didn't have anywhere to go so it just stopped. Adina grabbed a tree to stop herself from propelling forward. She cursed herself. If she'd been paying attention she'd have seen she needed to veer left. There was an open place that must be where she was going because he was sitting on an outcropping of rock, his back to her, a red cooler open next to him. A breeze ruffled his hair and Adina rolled her eyes. "The least you could do is say hello," she called.

She started toward him and made the mistake of glancing down the cliff side. Vertigo had her head spinning.

"I know you knew I was here," she said, sitting down the water bottle to take a second to breathe.

"Why, because of my mystical powers of observation?" he called over his shoulder and she narrowed her eyes, wanting to deck him.

"No," she called sweetly, "because I've been talking to myself for the past twenty minutes and I haven't exactly been quiet."

He laughed in spite of himself and ambled to his feet. When he turned to face her the sight of him was such a relief she nearly fell to her knees. Her fingers itched and she wanted to grab him. She walked slowly to the outcropping of rocks and untied her sweatshirt from her hips, letting it fall on the cooler. She closed her eyes when the breeze touched her bare skin and enjoyed it for a moment.

When she opened her eyes she turned her head to look at him. "Hey you," she said softly.

He smirked, lifting a finger to brush her cheek bone, "You're back early," he answered.

"Gina called." She watched his face shutter closed and inwardly she said something foul. "She had Kenny tell me about Gail." He turned away from her even as she reached for him, "Mathias-"

"You shouldn't have come out here by yourself, it's dangerous," he stepped away from the outcropping to go pick up the bottle of water she'd left at the little clearing's entrance.

Adina closed her eyes and pressed two fingers to her forehead just above her right eye. She was getting a headache there. "You really are having a temper tantrum, aren't you?" She said softly.

He made a bland face so she figured he didn't hear her. She wasn't going to repeat herself. He took her elbow, steering her gently away from the outcropping of rocks and more onto the dirt. Adina let him until she realized he was steering her back to the trail itself. Then she stopped. He shot her a reproachful look, "You should head back down, it'll be dark in a few hours. You don't want to catch cold up here."

Later, when the story was being retold, Adina would say she presented him with a well-thought-out argument that contained all the rational reasons why he was being a little difficult, as well as some suggestions for ways he could process what was likely some intense grief and frustration. The reality, as with most things, was a little different.

The first thing she did was shove him as hard as she could. Then she called him a juvenile idiot. Then she told him he had a tribe full of people who were more than willing to be there for him if he'd let them, starting with his sister, if he'd let them, but he was too busy fucking off doing that walk into the wind shit and sit cross-legged on a rock and feel sorry for himself to notice. Also, he was living like a badger and his apartment smelled like burnt corn chips. At some point she started punctuating her points with smacks. She told him he wasn't the only one who missed Gail, here she sobbed, then kicked him to prove her point. She told him he was an asshole for not calling her immediately. That there was nothing on this _planet_ that would have kept her away the second she knew, up to and including an amazing airline delay, and if he honestly thought propelling her back down the mountain like everything was fine was going to make her ignore the fact that he was obviously hurting then he wasn't just an idiot, he was a damn idiot.

To be honest, she wasn't entirely sure everything she said. By the third smack, he started yelling back. He told her she was an arrogant bitch who didn't know the first thing about his life. He said he knew damn good and well he could talk to people if he wanted to, but there was nothing any of them could do so what was the fucking point of it all. That he had to come out here and sit on a rock because he didn't trust himself to be on flat land within driving distance of the little shit who killed Gail. Here he took her by the shoulders and shook her hard. He told her the damn dog was still at the vet's and would likely pull through but would need to have a leg amputated and that seemed like the greatest injustice of all, didn't it? That he couldn't even protect a blind, one-eyed dog. He told her he was sick to death of the law, of following someone else's law when that law didn't do a damn thing to help his people and everyone knew there was no justice anymore out here anyway and the longer he spent up here the more he was convinced he should just say screw it.

Adina reared back, breathing hard. He stared down at her, there was a roaring, sawing sound and he realized it was his blood pounding. Adina shook her head, slapping him hard across the face. He stared down at her, his jaw clenched hard, his cheek smarting even if he wouldn't admit it.

"You do _not_ get to go be batman," she said, her cheeks were red, her eyes were shining. "That is the easy way out and you are _better than that_ you selfish prick." An angry tear tracked down her cheek and she ignored it, poking him in the chest with her finger. "You care _too much_ about right and wrong to go down that road and you know it. You wouldn't be able to live with yourself. And I love you too much to watch you go there."

She sobbed once, hard like it hurt her chest, and she put a hand to her diaphragm for a moment to steady herself. When she lifted her head she wiped her eye with the heel of her hand and almost laughed at the gobsmacked expression on his face. He reached for her and she stepped back, lifting her other hand to stop him.

"I love you, Mathias. Kenny told me about Gail and the only reason I didn't come back last night was there wasn't a flight. I promised you once I wasn't going to leave and I meant it." She sighed, "You stay up here as long as you need to. I'm going to go to the vet to see Useless."

Three steps was as far as she got before he grabbed her, spinning her around and kissing her hard. Adina groaned against his lips and he backed her against a tree. She twined her fingers in his hair and let him lift her legs, wrapping them around his waist. His fingers wrapped around her ponytail, angling her head up so he could blaze a path down her jaw to her neck. All pretense of gentleness gone. His lips and teeth were bruising, her fingers were hard on his skin.

He jerked her shirt over her head and she made a noise that was almost a snarl. Adina's fingers tore at his tee shirt, pulling it from his jeans and his fingers left her long enough to pull it over his head. He sank slowly to his knees, easing her down the tree trunk until they were on the ground. Her lips and teeth found his chest and she pushed him back, urging him onto his back on the dirt. She stood up, standing over him to jerk her pants and underwear over her hips and kick her shoes off.

She bent over him, tenderly lifting his head to place her jeans beneath, then her lips quirked into a challenging grin and she moved to straddle his shoulders. She looked down the line of her body, between the valley of her breasts to his face, "I love you," she said and it was a command. He closed his mouth over her and she moaned, her hips rolling with him. She slid her fingers in his hair and his lips and teeth and tongue were insistent,

He let her ride him, working to help her find the crest of her orgasm as his fingers went to the belt of his own jeans. Just as she was about to climax she abruptly slid away from him, she crawled down his body to his waist, jerking his jeans and his shorts just far enough down his hips to expose his erection. She straddled him again, this time taking his hands and guiding them to her breasts, still encased in the bra. Adina slid against him, teasing him. He moaned beneath her and she made a sound of pleasure above him. Only when he was begging, and not before, did she guide him inside her and then her pace was punishing.

She rode him hard, falling back on her hands fisted on his thighs. His fingers found her clit and he played with her until she orgasmed hard around him. Her cries were long and hoarse and loud. It was glorious fucking her out here like this. The sun lit her hair so it was fire around her. When he came it was on a shout that echoed off the rocks. Adina shivered above him and collapsed slowly down to his chest. Her breath was cool against the drying sweat. He held her, his fingers curled under the band of her bra.

"I'm glad you're back," he said quietly.

"Me too," she said, her fingers reaching up to run idle lines through his hair.

"I can take you to see Useless if you like," he offered, one of his hands sliding down to cup her ass.

She smiled against his chest, "Maybe later," she lifted her head enough to look him in the eye. "Have we adopted a dog?"

"Someone had to," he said, reaching up to curl a tendril of her hair around his finger. "You know what this means, don't you?"

"No, what?" She rested her chin on his bare chest, her lips pulling back into a lazy smile.

His finger traced her cheekbone, then down the line of her nose, then the curve of her lip. "I think you're awfully pretty."

 _~Fin~_


End file.
